"BELLER."

Star (Christchurch), Issue 5279, 8 June 1895, Page 3

"BELLER."

[BT A BUBHWOUAN.I

(_.us£raZasicn.)

It was perhaps my -wh fault, for when I sent to the registry office which produced " Beller " (as she called herself) for me /in the capacity of nurse I had requested them to .end a brisk, smart girl. " Beller " was sixteen, small, fragile, and freckled ; her red hair was close cut, her hands horny, her eyes, bright, eager, and rat-like. She wore a very short dress, a long apron, and hob-nailed boots. Never were human feet so noisy as " Bailor's j " when in action aha moved like a heavy dragooD. " Beller " was amttßingiy audacious. I had a married lady and her husband aa my gueßts. Soon after "Bailor" arrived I heard her inquire from my lady friend, " I Suppose yer was in Bervice afore yer got married ? " " Indeed no," said the lady. "Oh gam now," eaid " Beller," with a wink.

" Beller " used to be up early, and late going to bed; the household was awakened at the first blush of dawn by her footfall. Sometimes we thought a burglar was on the premises, but were reassured when hoarse Btage-whispers were heard asking whether "the milk had came for the Missus's tea ? "

" Beller" could never find time to lace her boots (I think she called them " water-tightß "). Sometimes she mislaid them and appeared like Hood's " Lost heir," with a boot on one foot, a Bhoe on the other— she was in an everlasting dishabille, and ehe always spoke with a sniff.

" Beller" lived in a perpetual whirlwind. She was always coming full tear round corners, and cannoning again at me on stairs and in passage.. If I aaked her (as soon aB I succeeded in getting my breath) " what ehe meant by it" she always replied she was " a chasing" the children, or the dog, or the cat. "Beller" was no respecter of parsons. On one occasion my lady friend and her husband were having a heated argument, " Beller" being within heariug.

"Ah ! " she remarked to me afterwards, " I 'card 'im and 'er rowin' in the 'all. She got the worst of it, eh ? " " I am afraid so," said I, concealing a

" Ah-h !" she said, •' my mother alius got 'er own way."

" How ?" I aaked.

" Well, Bhe used to 'it father over the 'cad with the ' belliia ' till he giv' in."

"Yob," added "Beller," "my mother don't stand no humbuggin*. She sea to me, ' Beller/ when I come 'ere as nurse, 'if them youngßters don't do what yer tell 'em giv' 'em plenty o' sly hits.' " On one ocoaaion I heard great horseplay in the kltohen, and going down, found "Beller" and "Bill" our butcher boy, romping.

" Bill " caught up his hat and muttered, " It's 'er fault," and left poor " Beller " to explain. "We was jest 'avin' it lark. Bill pinched me and I pinched 'im, and we 'ad a bid o' fun," she Baid, lifting the corner of her apron to one eye.

On another occasion I found " Bill " embracing hia enchantress in the scullery. I aaid nothing. I thought perchance the tender passion might soften the vigorous spirit of " Beller," and I wondered if " Bill " would succumb to the gentle influence of the " bellua " should ho and " Boiler " be made one.

He brought her offerings of flowersroses, filched from customer's gardens. These Bhe placed in her ruddy tresses.

She confided to me that Bill was " orf ul 'andßome," and like one of her favourite characters in a London Journal, "Algernon Le Warren." "0' course Bill aint got a waxy moustache, like Algernon 'as, but 'c 'as sech lovely curly 'air, and Va more aubstantialler in the figur."

Alas poor "BeHer," the fickle "Bill" soon forsook his lady-love. No more were roses in her ruddy locks. I found her one day weeping copiously,

" What is the matter, Bella ?" I a3ked.

"Bill and me ain't friends no more, mum. 'E ee_ to me — • Beller, I must 'aye a stylish young lidy,' and 'c's give me up. I'll never, never 'aye another ohap; 'c was tho love 'o my life was Bill."

On one occasion only was she known to take life easily. I had gone out for some hours and left her a task. When I returned it was not done. I asked the reason . she would give no answer.

" Surely," said I ; " you were not walking about all these hours doing nothing ? " "No, mum, I was a-settin' down." She told tho cook next day " r_he'd taken a fine rise out of the missus."

"Beller" and the servants wero always at variance ; they waged war against each otber. Poor " Boiler" was a butt for their jokep, and her fickl9 swain "Bill" had much to answer for. However, in her mothor'a vigorous spirit, she boxed. the

cook's ears and pulled the housemaid's hair, bo they decided Bhe was, aa the cook aaid, " worth leavin' alone." " Bailer " waa always hatted and booted in case of messages requiring to be delivered. Her hat was pare of ber indoor costume ; it waa a Bmall " sailor " with a "Union Jack" Bilk handkerchief swathed round it.

I used to wonder if she slept in it. " Beller's " favourite expressions were "to look fly " and "'urry up." I used to hoar her promising "beltine," "leatherins," and "hidings" to my family, and threats of " tellin' yer Mar on yer " were frequent.

The children were torn from their cots at cock-crow by " Beller," tumbled in and out of their baths, and their clothes thrown on— then hurried and scurried through breakfasts, till I thought dyspepsia would carry them off in tho flower of their youth.

A frantic rush, headed by " Beller," to tho school ensued, and the poor schoolmistress used to be roused from her sleep to admit the children and let them play in the schoolyard.

The children were rapidly acquiring a hunted expression from incessant nurryicg. Her ways were infectious ; I began to find myself hurryinp* and scurrying over trifles.

At length the climax came.

I was entertaining a party of friends at afternoon tea. The children were unnaturally prim and sedate and all was tranquil. Suddenly the door buret open and in dashed " Beller."

" Any of you kids seen the new butcher's dog?"

I arose in majesty and waved her from the room.

Next; day I dismissed " Beller." "What are yer sackin' me fer?" she queried.

I suggested she, was rather rough and hasty.

" Well, yer said yer wanted a smart girl, didn't yer ?"

I acknowledged ruefully Euch was the case.

"What are yer givin' us then?" said' " Beller."

"A week's wages," T responded suavely, as I deposited ten shillings in .her palm. She sped from view like a lapwing.