A CLEVER BIRD.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 4573, 18 February 1893, Page 2

A CLEVER BIRD.

"How d'ye do ? " he asked, with a grin of familiar recognition. "Don't seem to know me, do ye ? I was in here laat year and gave yer some anecdotes abont some snakes I saw abroad. Remember?" "Yes," growled the editor. "Ireoolleot yon. All your snake stories were false, and we got letters from all over the world Baying so. What do you want now?" "You. don't tell me," ruminated, the snake man, smoothing his hat softly. " False, was they P Mebbe the parties as writ to yer knowd more about them snakes than me. P'rbaps what I come to tell yer abont my speckled hen, is all false, too." " What has she done?" " Bhe's done more than . the snakes, and if the snakes was lies that hen's a whopper, th<vfa all I c»ri^say;"\ and he looked deeply injured. " Tell ns about her," said, the editor. " Yer hearn about the cat that hatched cbickens, I reckon. Well, my old speckled hen'a bin discounting that cat. She's batched four brood of kittens; one in each brood." "Oh, 1 go home/and sleep it off!" recommended ' the indignant editor. " Fact ! Four brood, and one to the brood. I seen her getting restless and setten on things, and tried fer to knock her out o* the idee. No use. She'd set on to a hot flatiron but what she'd set. Fast she hatched an old milkpail into tin cups, and then she squatted on some dough that was sot to ' rise, and I'm blessed if she didn't hatch out a dozen biscuits and then try to learn 'em to swim. I Been she was gottin broody, and I eayß to the old woman, says I, ' Mar, sumpin' must be done for that speckled ; hen.' Mar tumbled to the idee, and says ehe, 'It must,' so with that we figgered ! what we'd best do. While we was figgerin' she aot on a' load o' wood, and I'll est a grindstun if it diin't come out all sawed and split. I'm tellin yer this so yer won't i think the kittens wbb unnat'ral. Well, mar and me figgered and figgered, and while we was figgerin' the speckled hen | -vaa a figgerin* too. She -hopped on to a bar'l o' scrap iron, and I'm hanged if Bbc didn't whack oat two hundred papers o' tacks. We seen that sumpin' had got ter be done right off, but before we hit on to the scheme, tan my skin if she didn't set on the pump handle and hatch it into toothpicks. Sure as yer born. Somehow my reapin' machine got under her one night, and the next morning it was iron tent-pege. Yer never seen nothin' like it. She was bent fer to set, I'll tell yer." "No doubt of it. But how about the a kittens ?" . "Well, some men come to put a new roof to the house; got there just- ' before dinner, and left their tools in the yard. I see the old hen, watching them , tools, but : I didn't think no harm. Just before that— •-—"" Never mind; anything else. Come to the eats. " Jist so. While we was at dinner I seen her explorin', and I didn't know, from what happened the day before——" "Drop that!" Baid the editor sternly, " give us the four brood of cats, one in a brood." " Well, the four workmen were at dinner, and the old speckled hen was nosin' about, and I says to mar, ' Mar-—' " " Oat with those oats quick," and the editor took down a scythe. "Certainly. The tools was outside, yer know, four sets on 'em, in— what* s this they carry tools in ?" " A kit ?" " And that old speckled hen sot on , them four kits, and if she didn't hatch out four brood o'— — " Parties desiring to exchange a new scythe for a second-hand one, somewhat out of repair, will please apply to the editor.