"I'M AFLOAT!"

Star (Christchurch), Issue 6183, 10 March 1888, Page 3

"I'M AFLOAT!"

The Trials and Triumphs of a TorpedoBoat. I'm afloat, I'm afloat, for tho present, nt lea=t, Thougu on what may next hau^cu wild fancy will .east ; 1 Put i tay, up to now, I'm afloat, I'm Hfloit, Which is .o-uetbi-'j, you s..— f.r 11 Torpedo-Boat, It is trne my t ara-eiigino is all ont of gear, • And th -j top of my lead-pump is busted, 1 fear ; But in triumph I gl.ain, and iv gladness I gloat. For— though lea.y and crank—l'm afloat, I'm -float ! It is much. more than some of my consorts can say, Twenty-four of us started ona morning in May ; For a trini of steaming we -too- out to ssa , And, by Vulcan ! w. had a remarkable spree. Oh, the joy of the jolting, the pride of the pace A few of us, though, were soon ont of th. race. Twenty-six miles au hour— tor an hour— may do, -ill you run on a rock, and disable yonr ecre* ! One did so ; of course she no more conld be used, -mother broke down, foe her crank-brasses fuecd : A tbird made a show, but her^ pride was soon piqued When ncr engineer found how her main-feed valve leaked. Her fires were thon drawn, and, no doubt, you'll t perceive . That the f nriiaceß empty a ship's on sick leave ; Hut that wtis just nothiug compared with tha next— I'm assured her commander was reaUy quite Text, For they let in her boilers the water get low. And the furnac.-crowu cived in— a terrible blow I And tbe steam all escaped, aud ie flew tar and w.de. All (he Staff were wall scalded, and three of them died. Seven boats were thus " boshed "• will 't surprise youto lenrn Tha. an eighth — it's put vaguely— •' broke down on 1 return.'* Well, some did return, which is something to ' boast, Though a shaky, disabled, demoralised host. And now you'll perceive— it's as clear as a star— What a terrible lot we Torpedo Boats are. To whom ? Well— ahem ! —to— that ie— l suppose, To anyone handy, excepting our foe.. Ton see we go queer, aod we get oufc of pear, Go colliding like fun, being awkwaid to steer, Blow up, boil our crews, run aground, »y, and sink. Won't that frighten our enemies ? What do you thin- ? My positions are proved, I am happy to say, By ileports of those Trials the twelfth of last May. Bead them, and they'll second my simple remarks, And you'll own that our trials are really great larks. For myself, I feel Bhaky. They put me in dock, But 1 haven't entirely recovered 'he *>hock. Still do please recollect, when supplies you next vote, That although of small use, I'm afloat. I'm afloat.