BETTY'S SOLILOQUY.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 667, 13 July 1870, Page 4

BETTY'S SOLILOQUY.

Hard to live a quiet life ? Well, that's just as you choose to take it. Some folks hare the faculty for getting a'ong in this world. My name is Easy, and my nature is ditto. When I go to a place, I always say "yea " to every thing they ask me. I never make an objection to doing anything. Of course, my mistress likes that. As to really doing all I promise to do, leave me alone to manage that, with as innocent a face as the baby I take care of. Now, for instance, suppose she sends me up into the nursery to get the child asleep. It is tiresome work ; there's a great deal of coaxing, and twisting, and wriggling, and rockiDg, and singing to be done before that can be brought about ; and it gets me into a perspiration, and I don't like it. But, of course, I reply, " Certainly, ma'am," when she bids me ; and I take the child upstairs. Then I sit down with it ; and just hold it in some uncomfortable position, so that it will cry loud enough to fret its mamma. Then 6he endures it awhile, thinking baby will stop by-and-by ; but baby somehow don't stop. Then she comes up and says to me, " Betty, what do you think can ail baby ? " Andl ki«s it, and hold it up to my face, and say, " Poor little dear, I am afraid it has a bad stomach-ache ; it won't be easy, whatever I try." And then she says, "Well, I'll take it awhile, Betty, and see if I. can't soothe it to sleep ; " — and I say, " Oh, no, ma'am, it is a pity you Bhould tire yourself with the child ; " and she, seeing me so willing, just takes it— don't you see ? That's the way to do. There's no use in fighting one's way through the world, when a little cunning answers just as well. Well, then my mistress likes baby to go out of doors a great deal. Now, as a general thing, ! laever engage to live with a lady who don't keep her own carriage, on that account. It's very nice to be sent out in a carriage with the baby, for an airing, with John the coachman, particularly when John is agreeable, which is sometimes the case. But, of course, one cannot. always get a place to one's mind; and so, when my mistress uses her feet instead of a carriage, she needn't think that I shall do it any more than I can possibly help So, when she tells me to take baby out, I say, " Yes, ma'am," as I always do—respectfully, I hope— and out I go, and make for the first kitchen where I have a pleasant acquaintance, and baby can wait till we get through our gossip, which is not very soon. Of course, I never take a little tell-tale of an older child with me, on such occasions. I tell mistress I'm so afraid of its getting run over, or something, while I am minding baby. Then, as to my « privileges," I hope I know enough to have one of my friends ill or dead \.f I want an extra evening out. There can't apythfng be 6aid against that, you know, if pne \s pnly judicious enough not to have it happen ipo oftep. Sometimes J come across a mistress who. is too keen for me. Now, I never like, to lire with a. Ja.dy who han gray e£es jin thatv as ' c c ha?e a mutual ino'iqa. H.QQ .to part, of course ; but, as a general thing, I find my way of managing first-rate, because I give no " impudence," you see, which is what most ladies are so touchy about. As to " conscience " — humph ! where are their consciences, I'd like to know ? It is a poor rule that won't work both ways. I Bhpuld be worn to a skeleton if I kept a con6cience s