PARS ABOUT PEOPLE

Observer, Volume XXXV, Issue 44, 10 July 1915, Page 4

PARS ABOUT PEOPLE

AUCKLAND has had a very serious purpose in its giddiness this past week, and if some rather touchy people have felt their dignity shattered! by the persistence and "insults" of amateur and profesesional comedians—their pockets have been touched, which, after all, is all that matters to the wounded. The sanctity of social eminence has been ruthlessly fractured—even an Anglican cleric (Mr Jasper Calder) has been publicly charged with having been seen on a racecourse, and has pleaded guilty to the charge and fined. But this is not the worst. A clergyman was seen to enter a hotel —hotel, brethren, and heard to call in a hollow voice, "0! o!"—as if in sorrow at the weaknesses of his fellowmen, and to irrigate his respectable whiskers with prohibited fluid. Shocked persons ultimately discovered this cleric to be the Rev. Wynne Gray, and he and his fellow curates, clowns and others, sweated the whole day long with bulging collecting boxes and fast dwindling books ol tickets.

But tbat court was a gay old spot! When A. J. Entrican threw himself on the mercy of the "fair", jury, the fair jury up and fined him another guinea for throwing compliments. Serious citizens who generally strike awe into the breasts ot the populace, were ordered peremptorily "not to forget, ' take your hands out of your pockets, and, when whispering m a faint protest, "Don't dhout at counsel, sir. Imagine telling Mr A S. Bankart to take his hands out of bis pockets, or J. J. Craig (sensation!) to abandon the palpable disguise of whiskers ! The arresting constables were not always successful. The Herald" buildings were searched tor Air Harry Horton without result, it is believed! he was entrenched m the paper room. He was to have been charged Avith "having benzine, on petrol while disguised m a military uniform, and with consorting with another leader in a Lane, etc. so he handed a tenner over a roll oil paper and didn't appear. The cosmopolitan character of the proceedings were exemplified by the appearance of the young and growing Aucklander, Willie Ah Chee, who had, with, considerable difficulty, surrounded himself with a motor car, and who shook witli ill-repressed merriment all through the ceremony. Willie, leaving the court in an excited condition, accidentally collided with a group of "constables" and a prisoner. The whole force staggered under the weight of twenty-two stone, but the force rearrested! Willie.

Mr Abbott had already been fined, but as he was smiling approval from a box in the theatre the constabulary reached for him again. It was elicited in cross-examination that he was "part owner of this theatre. "Then," roared "his lordfehip," m a terrible voice, "how dare you have such dressing rooms for actresses and actors?" It was unanswerable. Fined again!

Has anybody noticed the intense shades of gloom on the faces of passers-by in Queen Street. If not, look again. Here is the trouble. Willie Endean leaves in a few days as a lieutenant for Trentham "to do his little bit," as he puts it modestly. Of course, the gloom is mixed with pride, but,, still, Auckland; is a duller place with Willie out of it. He has had quite a respectable military career already and is in all respects competent to go to the icy regions of Upper Hutt and train volunteers to defend our liberties.

"Alice Reynolds," of Waipu, takes exception to a harmless little picture of a ferry steamer published in the Observer of June 19. It illustrated the fact that ferry passengers generally are given to more or less expert discussion of the war, while homeward bound. This ,r a? the legend under the picture: "Our Local War Lords.—Mr McMac, of Waipu: Wot I say, I stand to, and don't care whether Kitchener knows it or not —or anybody else Yer know, 'cc's quite wrong. Now, if he had only done as I say about the Dargiinelles, 'cc would've been in Constangtinopell by this time!" The Mr McMac, of Waipu, might just as easily have been Misther O'O, of Onehunga, or Mister Smith, of Ponsonby, or Mr Jones, of Johnsonyille. In Reality the gentleman didn't come from Waipu at all, but if the land will call we shall be delighted to disolose his name, occupation and place of residence. * * .*

What is not denied is that Waipu has come nobly to the front for the Empire and the lady shows this: "1. Over seventy of the descendants of the Nova Scotians are fighting in Turkey. 2. Many of our Waipu boys are in Trentham; some left

to-day, and some are leaving on Tuesday; there is scarcely a young man left in the district. 3. Chaplain Angus MacDonaUd, at present in Egypt, is from Waipu, He also served in the Boer War. 4. Nurse Sutherland is already on her way to the Front and another sister nurse, Huia Sutherland, is in Auckland waiting to go. They are Waipu girls. 5. All the women are doing their share of sewing, some of the oldest ladies doing knitting, the young ones also, for that matter. 6. Last Monday week the church was filled with sad faced people who attended the funeral service of Trooper MacFarlane, who died at Trentham, giving his life for the Empire as truly as any who fell at the Front. I say without fear of contradiction that no district in New Zealand' has responded more nobly to the call of Empire than has Waipu."

Wounded in action in France Major George Relph Miller, 131 st Battery Royal Field Artillery, and for many years an officer of that battery. He is one of the fast diminishing band of young New Zealanders of the First New Zealand Con-

tingent (Africa 1899-1901) and was a plain trooper in that little lot. When George joined he was, described as a "cadet" and was aged 24. George had (and possibly has) an incurable passion for games of chance and would wager a day's pay on the number of times a blowfly would buzz in ten seconds, what quantity of rum the quartermaster's staff would "pinch" for itself, • the date the war would end, or the number of inches of mud in the regimental water-cart. He had a "system" for playing "crib," "crown and anchor," "house-about," poker or any other soldiers' game and when on long leave in New Zealand bet present writer five shillings that Auckland would be destroyed by an earthquake on April, 1913. A cheerful chap was George, careless, happy.? go-lucky and speculative—and being in the army he has had to earn his majority. In the R.F.A. there is no "to-day a draper, tomorrow a colonel."

A barrister now on the road, to fame is stopping with Friend S. J. Atkins at the Star Hotel. This notable is Mr G. P. Finlay, of Te Kuiti, who, though a prominent King Country Reformer, took Bill Jennings' part in the recent Election Court squabble. For his work at those proceedings he was highly complimented by the judges. Finlay is one of those, very big, open hearted men. When he sights you his whole face and body fairly beam at you .and makes for you with a bound, just as if he were storming the enemy's trenches. He says it's mighty cold at Te Kuiti, but it is quite possible to find a "something" to increase the thermometric pressure.

One of the first Australian soldiers killed at the Dardanelles was Sergeant E. R. Larkin, member of the N.S.W. Assembly for Willoughby, the only North Shore constituency which has ever returned a Labour member. Always a patriot, Larkin enlisted from the jump. He wrote a damning indictment of the party system just before leaving Egypt. "Selfishness," he wrote, "seems to be the main feature of some politicians, and it is only to be expected that they should try to glorify themselves, even at a trying time like this, irrespective of the public welfare. When I left the Labour tiger and the Liberal lamb were lying side by side, dreaming blissfully of the joy that was to fall on all and sundry: throughout their tentative friendship. Evidently the inherent antipathy asserted itself very soon. It v-ould suit a few of them better to be here doing something. Surely they don't expect that we who have given up our comfortable homes and all we hold dear and stepp>*i into the frmg line are the only ones to make sacrifices. Public men should! point the way. The rotters who are thinking only of themselves now will, I hope, be properly summed up when the day arrives."

When you talk law with him you call him "M.L.," of course. When he's off the foolscap chain, he's just "Mick"—Mick Lynch. Mick is better known in Auckland than the Town Clock —wherever that timepiece may be situated, and for the past twenty-three years he has daily attended his duties at the office of Mr W. Napier, barrister and solicitor. Most people like him; all people trust him and' best of all he knows his job. Mr Lynch's people have owned a farm, at Ramarama for forty years and "Mick" is as well known there and! at Pukekohe, Waiuku and other places as in Auckland. Having been born at Thames he is an ardent Thames "Old Boy" and—apart from law, d'ye mind— he's amateur champion billiard player of New Zealandi. That dynamic young man, Alan Moody (maybe you've seen his name in police court cases?) is leaving the firm of Moody, Hackett and Moody and is hitting out for himself. He'll be found— with Mick—in the Security Buildings next week. It's a good combination of forces, for Mr Lynch will take charge of the conveyancing business and Alan will turn his dynamo on at the Court. Good fellows both. Good luck to them!

That bright young spark, Johnnie Fuller,, junr., is visiting the metropolis of the North. Johnnie is growing into quite a prominent man. A few years ago he managed) to find an entry to the Windy l City's municipal council and now he is head of the poll of that august body, with, probably, further honours to follow. Just this time last year Johnnie was in dear old San Francisco and (had a rare old time. He enjoyed bis stay in the so-called "land of the free," but that it was very dimcult to go anywhere and get a square meal as she is spelt in New Zealand. "After all," says Johnnie, "the good old Dominion is tbe place for him." Just the country for a civilised man. The carking cares of managing a profitable business these awful war times sit tight on his shoulders. He gets no taller, but, let it be whispered, he is getting fuller—crossways.

Press people may be interested to know that Christchurch "Sun" played benevolent "musical chairs" with its staff lately. Managing director Dolamore having as per ..arrangement vacated the job after a year's tenure "Teddy" Huie, the live wire editor became managing editor; Allan Marris, one time a reporter of Wellington "Post" and a fluent writer of verse, subsided gracefully into the editorial chair. Dick Harris, former 1 •• assistant editor of the Observe, and wo left this paratorium to become a reporter on the "Sun," is now associateeditor of it and so finds little time to devote to verse making in which he is a master hand. Dick, by tlie way, married an Auckland lady since he left this city.

A little group of Wairarapa semimillionaiiires amused themselves for a few minutes last week by spending eleven thousand! pounds in ten minutes by buying a photograph of Trentham camp. Wairarapa is painfully rich, and D. H. S. Riddiford, who owns 100,000 of the "eyes," "Billy Bairton " also in the fleece industry, "Bill" Hume, George Hume, and a couple of the Bidwills, the racehorse people, not to speak

of Mrs McDougall l , Mrs James Donald, all of the flocks and herds persuasion, each bid £1000 for the picture, and didl not lift it. The braw Scots knight of the Wairarapa, Sir Walter Buchanan, threw his £1000 in, and the historic sun picture, which cost £11,000, is to be given to Featherston Public Library. That patriotic concert brought £20,000 for the siok and wounded-—so squatters do rise to the occasion sometimes. Rumour hath it that the audience represented about two million acres of land, and enough gold to keep two healthy men shovelling for an average lifetime.

A. H. Hindmarsh, M.P., who has been appointed Chairman of the Labour Party in Parliament is a fierce little gentleman of the legal type—but quite a gentleman, don't you know—with admirals and peers and generals and fathers of 15 in the family, and no blots on the family 'scutcheon. The horny handed as a matter of fact would much prefer to have a duke to lead them than a horny handed one and if Hindmarsh isn't a Duke no earthly man could accuse him of being a typical Labourite. He has the necessary qualifications^—an uncontrollable appetite for speech, a fiery denunciatory style, a mental glass that magnifies a molehill five thousand diameters and a belief that he understands wharf lumpers and other real physical' toilers. Mr Hindmarsh, who is an exceedingly warm-hearted man would explode into a four hours' speech on the iniquity of allowing a wharf labourer to hump bags of wheat in wet weather without umbrellas and if bell-toppers would do them any good he'd fill "Hansard" in an endeavour to give public belltoppers to navvies.

"R.W." dissertates generally: Bill Robinson, of the City Council staff, writing from Freemantle lately, says they had a great four dlays in Sydney' and were royally treated. Bill, who is a very popular and cheerful young fellow joined the Medical Corps. Bill was ex-

amined medically once in Auckland and twice again at Trentham, a very stiff overhauling. The other clay a man went up to pass the doctor at the Drill Hall. He was found to be physically fit in every respect, a fine specimen of manhood, but he was rejected because he had upon his great toe an IN-GROW-ING nail.

Ye gods! Memory goes back to the time of the Maori war, when the guard would walk info your shop or office and simply touch you on the shoulder and march you off to Barrack Hill, sling a bag with 60 roundls of shot over you, and walk you away to Otahubu, where you slept that same night. No reference to in-growing nails in those days. J. M. Lennox could recall something of that tramp to Otahubu. Talking of medical exams., there was Charlie Wright, an old Tommy, tried to pass at Hastings and was rejected. He came to Arickland and the medicos passed him flying. He is now at tlie front.

An eyewitness lately from Trentham asserts that two doctors had to cope with the ailments of 2,750 men. There were four medical officers but two were laid aside through sickness. Last Sundlay week there were two nurses at the camp. Twelve more came later and at present there are 20 looking after the afflicted ones. The visitor believes the sooner the camp is moved from its present swampy surroundings to Palmerston, North, or other drier locality the beter it will be for the men. There is a total absence of grumbling amongst those who are victims to the maladies and on the whole t|he mten sm cheerful and anxious to get at the enemy. Food is good at any rate even if accommodation if defective. One feature is remarkable, the burly man from the bush or farm is in the worst case amongst the victims of the flu., while the townies get off lightly. Morning parade, with drill, has been altered from 6 a.m. to 6.30. The early drill was found exhausting. They could hairdly see one another in the dark. The visitor says that Wellington has a noble army of shirkers. They visit the camp accompanied by their walking sticks, and get a bad time from the boys in khaki. Some of these parlour heroes have tlie front to ask the boys in camp to buy tickets for their own relief, against the day in which the fortunes of war may have disabled them.

Lady Jellicoe's opinion that in the future no man without a medal will be able to get a wife may be effective in inducing ordinary blokes to go to the front and become heroes, but if it proves a true pronouncement heaven help the next generation. Millions of men have fallen at the front, millions more may fall, and tins means a woeful scarcity of marriageable men in, the near future. It is the youiiji; and single men who have gone inco the trenches, and for the most part it is they who are being sacrificed. We have to remember, too, that before the war there was in most European communities a preponderance of females. That preponderance will be enormously increased as a result of the war, and if, as Lady Jellicoe predicts, the girls of two, or three years hence won't look at a man without a medal the world will halt in a most alarming manner. No, your ladyship, women don't always want heroes for husbands, and in tlie great scarcity coming the girls will have to be content with what's offering. 'Tis a pity 'tis true, but there you are.

Died of wounds sustained in the er Arthur Stanley Endean, of the Wellington Mounted Rifles service of his country, TroopRegiment. Trooper Endean was one of the sons of that esteemed citizen, Mr John Endean, of Auckland—a bright young man well known in the field of sport, and having innumerable friends. We print a small photo of Arthur Endean. He had, for some years prior to going to the Wairarapa to engage in farming, been an employee of the firm of Briscoe and Co., where lie was highly esteemed by his fellow workers for his excellent qualities. He was one of the first men in Wellington to join the Expeditionary Force, and left with the Main Body. He was one of the boating crew who won the Dewar Shield, played a good game of football for Parnell, and was a member of the Auckland Golf Club.

Dr. Carl Graupner, the German scientist, who has promised the Kaiser a destroying gas that will eclipsein destructiveness anything the Allies can bring against "Prussiam armies, is a professor not unknown to Australia. At one time Melbournearid Sydney playgoers made something of an idol of a niece of his, Miss Flora Graupner, who acted in many popular presentations of theGilbert and Sullivan operas.