Pars About People.

Observer, Volume XXIX, Issue 44, 17 July 1909, Page 4

Pars About People.

WP. JAMES, S.M., whose death « occurred at Masterton last Sun.

day, was notable as one of the batch of former Clerks of the Magistrates' Courts who were promoted to the magisterial bench some years ago. It will be remembered that F. J. Burgess, at present S.M. at the Thames, was another— and an earlier — member of the same distinguished band. Prior to his elevation, Mr James was one of the best known and most popular officials of the Justice Department in the colony. His early youth was spent in Auckland, where two or three branches of the James family were rather prominent in the "sixties." After receiving hia education here, he entered the civil service, and was sent South, where the whole of his official career was spent. For long periods he was Clerk of the Court, first in Dunedin and then in Wellington, from which place he was finally chosen for magisterial responsibility. In his time he was also a representative Rugby player, chiefly in Wellington teams, and an enthusiastic oarsman and yachtsman.

The selection for the Bench of experienced Court officials was, at the time of its institution, considered to be a wise and judicious step, and likely to become a permanent feature of the Justice Department's system, and the experiment has been justified by its results. To judge from recent occurrences, however, it does not appear to find favour with the present Government. All the late appointments to theV ßench have been made from the ranks of practising solicitors, and it is generally understood that it is not intended to promote any more officials unless they pass the law examinations. That means that few, if any, of the present Clerks of Court will get the chance of preferment. Vsry few men, however capable, have the time to apply themselves to courses of study in the midst of pressing official work, even though they might, in earlier years, have been able to pass the necessary examinations with flying colours. Seeing that Clerks of the Court imbibe every day an atmosphere of law and of court practice, and that the more experienced of them are invaluable advisers to the magistrates, it might have been expected that the path of promotion would still have been kept open to them. However, the authorities seem to think otherwise.

The presiding officer of one of the friendly societies in an up-country district is named John Axe. Probably, this is the country substitute for a time-limit or closure rule. At any rate, if long-winded discussions are attempted in that lodge, all that should be necessary is to sharpen up the Axe and set it to work to cut the orations short. -*

Professor Alfred Manes, of Germany, where the sausages come from, is at present in Wellington, and, of course, the übiquitous interviewer grabbed his stylo and got on the Teuton's track. In the course of the ensuing conversation, the professor made the following somewhat startling remark : — "Your hours of labour — you work eight hours a day, sleep eight hours — what of the other eight hoars ? That is the point ! Never mind what hours are worked — it is what is done in that other eight hoars. We have people who shout for eight hours." What a paradise the Fatherland must be for thirsty individuals who have a propensity for consuming alcoholic liquor at the expense of other people ! Why don't our local street loafers make tracks for Germany? They never would be missed.

Evidently, Sir Joseph Ward's trip to and through Australia, on his way to the Defence Conference, was anything but a pleasure excursion. Until he reached Adelaide, he kept two private secretaries busily employed while he thrashed through piles of official work which he took away with him. From Adelaide, one of these secretaries, F. G. Matthews, turned back — he arrived in Wellington last week — leaving Principal Secretary Hislop to attend his chief for the remainder of the voyage, and in the strenuous time which awaits him in London. With a tactful secretary to bar the door against suspicious interviewers, Sir Joseph ought to be pretty safe from the attentions of discontented excolonists, even without the alleged police guardian of whom we have heard so much.

George Bennett, an old Auckland and Thames boy who haa just served a term on the Wanganui Education Board, was re-elected last week without opposition to his seat for the southern ward of the district, which includes Palmerston North, where he hangs out his business shingle. It was more than an ordinary return by default, for Mr Bennett was nominated by the chairmen of all the principal school committees in and around Palmerston. Another member of tbe Bennett family also cuts an important figure in New Zealand's biggest inland town — George's brother Arthar, who is the managing spirit of one of the milling companies in Palmerston, and puts his shoulder energetically into municipal and political work.

J. J. Craig shrewdly hit upon the weaknesses of Auckland mining schemes when he told a newspaper reporter that most people went into mining companies merely for the puipose of operating in the sharemarket. But in saying that he only stated what was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be. By the time Mr Craig inoculates the public with the idea that their duty is to put their money into companies, wait for calls and dividends, and shun scrip-mongering, the Stock Exchange will have become the meet-ing-place of a mutual improvement class, and all its bulls and bears be turned out to grass. For, verily, before tbe speculative element comes to be repressed, and only straight- out investment indulged in, the millennium will be in sight.

Judge Kettle says that every barmaid should be a judge of human nature. As a general rule, she is — especially where Johnnydom is concerned.

She can judge him by his collar, She can judge him by his tie ; Sbe can judge him by his general vacuity. She can judge the dude bar-loller By the eyeglass in his eye ; She can sum him up with ease and ingenuity. Mr Kettle needn't worry, She can sum up in a trice, — No matter what their rank and nomenclature,

Ev'ry customer — she'll distinguish Twixt the nasty and the nice — You can't beat her as a judge of human nature.

Charles Berkeley, who was in Auckland a short time ago as one of J. C. Williamson's business staff, is not an admirer of goats, and tbis is the reason why : — When he was in Kalgoorlie lately in advance of Julius Knight, he happened to look out of his hotel window early one morning upon the horrifying spectacle of a large caprine family enjoying their matutinal repast off the just pasted bills announcing the season. Hushing out, he upset as many of the depredators as he could reach with both feet, and then, beiDg an enthusiast in his work, set to and began to repair the awful damage they had wrought. But in his haste he forgot to plant supports and rear guards, and his unprotected back as he stooped over his work was a tempting target. The amateur billposter's first intimation that the euemy had turned the tables was a shock that nearly drove him through the hoarding. Any query about the Kalgoorlie fauna is now liable to overexcite him.

Here is something for the W.C.T.U. to look into : — IF W. T. does not call for; his clothes, they will be sold to defray expenses.— 2s, Upper Union-street. Apparently, W. T., whoever he may be, is meandering round without his clothes, and this sort of thing shouldn't be tolerated in a decent community. Where are the police 1

This civic reception business is being done to death. It was recently announced in tbe "Star" that ■" Mrs Catherine L. Stevenson (president of the Massachusetts W.C.T.U.) will arrive in Auckland on August 15, and will be accorded a civic reception by His Worship the Mayor." Bnt, in the name of goodness, why should a civic reception be accorded to Mrs Stevenson ? The position of president of the W.C.T.U. may be a very exalted one from the W.C.T. Unionists' point of view, but the general public certainly don't look upon it as such. If Auckland is going to accord a civic reception to every casual representative of cold water bodies that comes along, she will soon make herself a laughing stock. It is time to draw a hard and fast line with regard to this matter.

The Hon. George Fowlds waxed quite poetical on the occasion of unveiling the Seddon Memorial at tbe Royal Oak corner. The Hon. George recalled the fact that at the time of Mr Seddon's death he was in England. And, remarked George : " he could remember the excitement which prevailed when the news was Hashed across the cables. In trams. and in trains people spoke in whispered words •Seddon is dead.'" Well, this might have been the case at Home. But, judging by the paucity of support given by the people of this Dominfon generally to projected Seddon Memorials, the sentiment out here was " Who was Seddon 1" If he had been so minded, the Hon. George could have preached an eloquent sermon on this theme. It would have been very apropos.

Either Editor Shand or Proprietor William McCullough, of the Thames " Star," has conceived a novel way of pushing editorial advice upon the Thames deep level mining companies. In the opinion of the " Star," it will be disastrous to the Thames if the £5000 subsidy offered by the Government for the 1000-feet level prospecting tunnel is not accepted, and it plainly indicates this view in its editorial columns. Evidently, however, it fears that the mining magnates may not bother to read the "Star" editorials, so it emphasises the matter by sandwiching throngh its news columns, in all the glory of capital letters, an oft-repeated three-line paragraph, which runs as follows : — "DEEP LEVEL ADVICE: ACCEPT £5000. COMMENCE WORK AT ONCE !" If this sort of thing is tobe persisted in, we shall soon not be able to enjoy the deliriously exciting announcements of the " Wanted colnmn, for fear of finding in it journalistic counsel hurled at as concerning some question of constitutional reform or international politics over which editors have . grown ' enthusiastic.

E. H. Taylor, M.P., seems to have a quaint idea of the principle on which Government subsidies to mining should be based. If the papers report him correctly, he says that if the driving of the Thames deep level crosscut results in the discovery of rich areas, there is no question that further Government assistance than the present £5000 grant will be forthcoming. But, surely, if the £5000 subsidy turns out to be sufficient to prove the existence of rich gold in the low levels, the mining companies will be glad enough to open up those areas on their own account, without asking for additional Government aid. Mr Taylor is hardly likely to endorse the idea that to them who have, much should be given. Anyhow, once give the Thames a big find in the low levels, and things will boom on such a scale that it need aak for nothing more.

Joseph Beecham, of Beecham's Pills fame, has given £300,000 to endow a British national opera house. It is understood that seating accommodation therein will be worth a guinea a box.

John Stevens, ex-M.P. for Manawatu, whose frequent contributions to debate in spite of the affliction of blindness were pathetic incidents of the late New Zealand Parliament, has an interesting double in Gregor McGregor, one of the labour leaders in the Commonwealth Senate. In debate (says Melbourne " Punch "), Mr McGregor's blindness is no real handicap. His hearing is so acute and accurate that he knows every Senator's voice, and individualises each interjection, while his memory has, by cultivation, become prodigious, so that when he recently rose to attack the Government and all its works, without any previous preparation he was able to talk interestingly for two hours and a-half, and to quote sections of the Constitution as glibly as if the Act were lying open in front of him.

The party place great faith in " Old Mac's " cleverness, and there is no man who can ring the changes on cant Labour arguments with more astuteness or apparent sincerity.

The London correspondent of the " Star " appears to be desperately hard up for news. How otherwise can the serving up of tbe following futile piffle be accounted for: — "Although Colonel Burton has now been absent from New Zealand some 18 months, he still retains an affectionate regard for the far-off Dominion." Considering tbe financial interests that Colonel Burton is understood to hold in this country, it would be a matter for wonder if he didn't still retain " an affectionate regard "for it. The "Star" might just as well say that Henry Brett retains an affectionate regard for this country, although whether tbe country has an affectionate regard for Henry Brett may be another matter.

As a raconteur, as well as a silver tenor, John Fuller takes some beating. John relates how, when he first peregrinated tb the Antipodes, he effected a landing in Tasmania. Some of the Tasmaniacs, desirous of showing John the beauty of their sea beaches and shingly shores (which two latter words please say quickly), conducted him out to a certain beach, in the vicinity of which a tribe of oysters roosted riotously on the rocks. While there, one of the Tasmaniacs suggested that John should lift up his silver tenor voice and sing. Nothing loth, John complied, and tuned up a song that was popular in those daye, which song went by the title of " The Pilgrim of Love." " And," says John, in relating the yarn, " before I'd finished the first verse, all the oysters in tbe neighbourhood had opened their bally shells and come out to see the view and hear the music." From which it may be inferred that if John Fuller is ever pushed for a job, he will be able to obtain a billet opening oysters at the nearest fish emporium.

Mrß Catherine L. Stevenson (president of the Massachusetts W.C.T.U, and for four years corresponding secretary of the National Union) will arrive in Auckland on August 15th, and will be accorded a civic reception by his Worship the Mayor on Monday at the Council Chambers. 'Mayor Charley Grey : I suppose Fm all right and up to the knocker, but I feel just like a fish out of water. W.C T. U. teceptions are a bit out of my line. Anyhow, here goes for a— ahem ! — soda water, to get my pecker up.

His Majesty the King has established a medal for brave constables and firemen, and awards may be made in any part of tbe Empire. Sergeant Dennis : Be jabers, an' now that's the foinest thinj that good o'd King Ted has done in his loife. It's me that has earned it many a time ; but I'm nimble yet, and I'll give the youngest spalpeen in the foorce a run for the first medal, anyhow.

The Rev. Gray Dixon recently delivered a lecture on " The Land of Burns'." Judging by our fire returns, this certainly ought to have referred to New Zealand. Anyway, it is to be hoped that it didn't refer to a place that is considerably more famous for tires than even this country.

Edward Seddon, brother of the late Prime Minister, who is reported as having suffered from the descent of tbe retrenchment guillotine, and lost his billet under the Agricultural Department, is an individual whose appointment was the subject of a good deal of discussion when he was admitted to the Civil Service some six years ago. Up to that time he had been living in the Waikato, and suddenly the settlers in the district were surprised to find a person who had never counted for much amongst them blossom out into the rank of a Government inspector, and wait upon them wearing knickerbockers, gaiters, and an official air, armed with authority to call upon anyone who had blackberries or other noxious weeds upon his property to eradicate them, or suffer the pains and penalties by law provided. Subsequently, Mr Seddon developed further official wiugs as an inspector of dairies, and this position he continued to hold until the recent roar for retrenchment displaced him.

But Edward Seddon never came more prominently into the limelight than on the occasion of King Dick's return to Auckland by the San Francibco mail steamer from one of his official trips to England, when in the height of his influence as an Imperial statesman. The Liberal and Labour Federation were anxious to do honour to their political chief; and one of their steps to xjt&p end was to take his relative in hand and make him one of

the factors in the reception deputation. Accordingly, Edward Seddon, usually a plainly-dressed person, arrayed himself for the nonce in an irreproachable frock coat, tall bell topper, lavender trousers and fine lineu, and was placed in the fore- front of the party that assembled to meet the

steamer. Physically, Edward Seddon was the antithesis of the stalwart statesman, and even fine feathers' and Lib. -Lab. associations did not avail to make him an especially awesome figure. If it was intended to impress his great kinsman with the access of dignity that had lately come to him, the experiment was not a signal success. For it is stated that when '« King Dick's " eyes fell upon tbe apparition he smiled a smile that betokened amnsement more than anything else. By the way, it seems that the severity of the retrenchment blow has been mitigated in Mr Seddon's case. If report speaks truly, a niche has been found fof him at the Arms Office in Auckland.

George Knight has recently blossomed out as a phrenologist. At a recent meeting of the Mount Albert Literary and Social Club he read the bumps of a couple of those present. Some of the members of tb,e City Council and the Hospital and Charitable Aid Board badly want their heads read. Will George sea to it ?

It is a standing joke about Frank Mackenzie, the enterprising editor and proprietor of the " Northern Luminary," that subscribers to the paper are in the habit of paying their subscriptions in pumpkins, and cabbages, and carrots, those being the local substitute for a cash currency. . Some of the Thames Methodists, however, appear to go one better than this, judging from the following extract from the report of a recent meeting of the Upper Thames Methodist circuit : — "Satisfaction was expressed when the balance-sheet was read, although it showed a debit of £7 3s 3d. Thie debit would bave been greater only some friends had contributed sacks of chaff." The collection boxes, or bags, or plates, or whatever they nse in the Upper Thames Methodist Church, must be pretty capacious affairs if the congregation in general is in the habit of contiibnting such bulky articles. And What about the unfortunate individuals who take up '-tbe collection ? Well, well; sacks of chaff are bad enough. Let us hope they never get down to sacks of thistles.