The Opening of Parliament.

Observer, Volume XXVII, Issue 41, 29 June 1907, Page 23

The Opening of Parliament.

THE SPEECH PROM THE THRONE.

(For the Observer).

Loudly roared the cannonade, Louder still the bugles played. Adown the street With rushing feet, Just to watch their annual treat, Came the folk who live below — Where the gentle breezes blow. Where, I ween The silvery sheen Of the sun is rarely seen. Down in Wellington afar, Where the scrumptious earthquakes are ; And it was Agog, because Parliament, to make more laws, On that day mast opened be. So they thronged abroad to see How His Ex. Could clear the decks — Went to watcti with craning necks Stern-browed troopers gaily prance — Down the street their horses dance. Off they went. On pleasure bent, Just to watch the great event.

Then in the shades of Parliament the Governor arose ; lie coughed a slight patrician cough, and quickly blew his nose. Around the throne the M.L C.'s in stately grandeur sat, But William Beeban spoilt the show by sitting on his hat. And round the wise Thorne Georgian head, 'twas very, very clear, The very microbes seemed to know they hovered round a Peer. And, oh! to be an M.L.C. must be extremely grand, Far better than an M. H. R. —the Lords don't need to stand Altho' the Governor is there ; and yet anM.H.R Must toe the mark —he's got to stand respectfully afar. And there the humble Commons stood, while all with/one accord Were thinking thai they'd give a lot to be a giddy Lord. And over all jthe stately room there stole a hallowed hush — 'Twas only broken by the sound occasioned by the blush Of Alfred Kidd, whose manly cheek was mantled by the rose, And Alfred's blush is quite a treat — he's bashful, I suppose. Poor Freddie Baume was looking tired —he should have been in bunk, For, oh, the journey knocked him out —that journey down the Trunk. While from Frank Lawry's ruby lips a sentence you could catch; He said, if I remember right, " Who's got a bally match ?" With youthful ardour Alison was looking round to try If he could get a eporting chance to catch the Speaker's eye. And Eden's only Bollard stood in {happiness complete, He knew a triek —a useful trick of sleeping on his feet. And once again bold C. H, Poole had braved McLachlan's snort, Determined that he'd show to Mac the value of retort ; While Opposition Massey smiled —he thought about the fun That he was going to have whene'er the session had begun. And so with grave, respectful mien they gathered there to wait Until the Governor arose in grandeur to orate.

• • a Up rose His Ex. and cleared his throat, Said he : " I'm pleased to say, Of work I've got a mighty lot To give to you this day. And for the next three months, or more, You'll find, no doubt with zest, Unless you shirk a lot of work You'll rarely get a rest. 'Tis very clear That while you're here, You'll rarely get a rest.

1 -f«'A¥ yd^^a^are; yoorr'w'drtiiy chief, Sir Joseph W ard, has been To London town, arid gained- renown* For— well, 'tis eas'ly seen That, tho' bold Deakin may declare 'Twas he who ran the shpw— . ; Why, that is what is known as rot, Affairs were run by Joe. ' Oh, Deakin b cheek Is quite unique. .' Affairs were run by Joe. When Joseph dined with good King Ned, The duchesses and dooks On Joseph's air, with wild despair, Cast many envious looks. And Campbell-Bannerman declared He'd learut a thing or two ; For Joseph taught him how he ought The Premier's work to do. Oh ! England knows The debt she owes To Joe — she ought to do. " And in the session that begins Upon this very day, 'Tis plain to see some work there'll be To drive dull care away. For instance, it is very clear That you must soon devise Some ways and means behind the scenes The tariff to revise. 'Tis only right, 'Twill cause delight — The tariff you'll revise. " The working man has got to pay Too much, and he enlarges On what each day he's got to pay In various kinds of charges. He wants free baccy, clothes, and boots, Demands free breakfast table, 'Tis also clear he wants free beer— So give it, if you're able. As he has might,'Tis only right You give him all you're able. " Your kind attention I'd direct To ways of arbitration ; 'Tis clear, I think, we're on the brink Of wholesale devastation. Unless, as Millar has proposed — And his suggestion sage is— ._....,, t . A Wages Board could well a'fibrd ";;.-; To give more rise in wages. . : .'-: r The workers must . ~~~??4lk\ Advance or bust, So let's advance their wages. " *■ " A tax upon the bachelors Is what McNab proposes, I think it would be very good — So Alfred Kidd supposes. And, though the worthy C. H. Poole May frown, and call it rot, Yet still 'tis best that City West Should tie the nuptial knot. A bachelor Would cash up or He'd tie the nuptial knot. "And, oh, I pray you, gird up high Your loins for a fight ; The Land Bill is a bitter pill— The prospect's fraught with fright/ For some of you are freehold men, And some would have the lease; Oh ! haste, I pray, without delay, And let us have some peace. So cure or kill That weary Bill, And let us rest in peace. "So now, my trusty M. H.R.'s, And worthy M.L.C.'s, Hard work is nigh., so bid good-bye To days of scrum tious ea^e. For sounds of strife are in the air, And tumult of debate. So get you gone to muse upon The sadness of your fate With grief intense You may commence The work of dull debate."