BIDDY MURPHY ON ST. ANDREW'S TROUBLES.
(For the Observer )
Och! St. Ann Drew'a meeting— what, loving greeting Or snag prayer-meeting could with it compare ? ~ When tte great kirk sisaion and the high commission, Like an inquisition, was assembled there, In solemn conclave to try the eldhers For their shortcoming and disunity, Causing great friction and contradiction Been one themselves and the commit-fce.
'Twas dignifying and most edifying To behold the clergy and the laity, Ache loving brother accuse the other Of sinful conduct and impiety — Of dodges sinister to appoint a minister In ways unortherdox and mighty odd ; Their coat-tails thrailin', prepared to sail in, And bash ache other for the love of God.
First the Moderator and pacificator, The mild MacNicol, opens up the ball, In tones of feeling to their hearts appealing To conthrol their timper9 and avoid a sqnall ; In his introduction denouncing ruction, Unseemly scrimmages and fights to shirk ; Ache Christian brother his rage to smother, And love ache other in the sacred Kirk.
Och, the grand oration and big sensation When Whitfield rises and takes the flure, And his swate voice raises in illigant phrases, Denouncing eldhers, who sit quite demure ; Cursing the scandal with bell, book, and candle, In. sintences sounding and words mighty big, Like some fierce disputer or Crown Prosecutor, Such as Tole when dressed in his gown and wig.
Thin, amidst excitement, a stronff indictment Of sixteen clauses bould WhitfMd reads, And the wicked sission sends to perdition For their ambition and rebellious deeds. Abuse he spatters on the eldhers Patterson, Williams, GraLdison, and Andrew Bell; Their opposing Milne he condemns as villainy That would be disgraceful in an infidel.
Next Misther Hastie, so nice and tasty. His coat-tails trailing along the ground ; His nate shillalagh he twisted gayly, And with stern defiance he glared around. If Bell, the traitor, the moderator, Would be insulting, his head he d maul. Bays the Chairman, curtly,' It doesn't hurt me, And doesn't trouble me at all, at all.'
'Ye ken,' says Hastie, ' the obstinate beastie Might have repented of h s sinful ways, And make confeseion of his sad transgression, Instead of ructions iv the church to raise. If he'll make submission, and his opposition To our decision will humbly cease, Then we'll embrace him, in the fold replace him, Among the saintly in joy and peace.'
Then up rose Shearer to make things clearer, An i said that many who opposed the call Were ancient fossils and Rip Van Winkles, Who had no business in the kirk at all. For twenty years, so it appears, They had no share iv the church's work, Which caused loud laughter to shake each rafter And shock the elders of St. Ann Drew's Kirk.
Then, Haslett's pleadings agin the whole proceedings Aroused a feeling of great disc -.ntent; For he said no copy of the accusations To the poor detindant was iver sent. 'Twas agin all season, and oat of season, And quite contrary 10 the golden rule, Such tales to tell agin brother Bell, Who had been bo active in the Sunday school.
Shure, no saint traduced that the world projuced In ail the calendars that was iver known Could show such patience under thribulations As broth* r Bell had so meekly shown ; They might history range all for an average angel, Such cruel abuse that would sthand, begob, The most saint-like would go out on sthrike, Take off his wings and give up the job.
In a kind of daze, Patterson essays To ascertain what the row's about, Being quite dumbfounded, and clane astounded And mighty anxious to find it out. Och! he was bothered and complately smothered To know what sin or wrong he'd done ; While war was waging and battle raging, He sat quiescent and enjoyed the fun.
Then the battle grew like great Watherloo, And hot words flew, wounding many there, Till the congregation, in great trepidation, They all retreated to the open air. Then the conflict inded, and pace discinded Like gintle jew, on the gory plain, Till some casus belly brings another mclley. And the ha} roes draw cheir claymores again
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Bibliographic details
Observer, Volume XVI, Issue 950, 13 March 1897, Page 20
Word Count
692BIDDY MURPHY ON ST. ANDREW'S TROUBLES. Observer, Volume XVI, Issue 950, 13 March 1897, Page 20
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