Personal,

Observer, Volume 9, Issue 524, 5 January 1889, Page 10

Personal,

Suitable items for insertion under tim head are inviled. They should be short and sweet, authenticated by the writer's real name and address, and should reach us not later than 9 a.m. on Wednesday—A letter lies at this offiae for Mr. 8. Dummy. —The Taits, lute of Newmarket, are doing very well in Melbourne, and like the place immonsoly. —We are glad to hear that Mr C. O. Montrose, whose death was recently reported, is still in the land of the living. —Last week Mr Alex Reid, of the Star, led Miss White ot Vincent-street to the ' hymeneal alter.' Joy be with them. — It is said that Sir Julius Yogel received .£SO down for his novel, publisher taking all risks and dividing jjrofifcd — if any. — It is considered doubtful whether Mrs Louisa Collins, the Botany husband-poisoner, will be hung — on account of her condition. — Melbourne Punch, speaking of Alison Smith, the railway man, says ' in Melbourne he seems to have made an enemy of every railway employee and nearly every member of Parliament. How do' s it a'l come about ?' — If ifc should ever be deemod expedient to chanare the name of the Domain— reohristen it — we would suggest that Yum Yum Park would nil the bill admirably. Why? Oh, take a stroll there any of these hot nights and see. j j — Gleccon, the burglar, is between eighties aul nineteen years of age, slightly made, and of somewhat feminine appearance, having no beard or moustache. He stands sft_ 7Ain in his stockings. He says that he was born in Auckland and was brought up as a stock-rider. — At the draper's. Irate lady to bland shopwalker: — ' Here, J want to know what you mean by telling me yesterday ifc was the last day I should have a chance of buying those fur boas at 15 b'd. I see them marked 9s lid to-day.' It was perfectly true, madam ; and if you will roliuuj for one moment you will admit that it ia so.' — 'Nothing like beer' seems destined to replace the more familiar adage about leather. Sir Edward Guinness has just transferred the sum of ,£700,000 from his balance at the banker's to the account of the Marquis of Ailesbury, in consideration of becoming the owner of Savernake Forest. — ' The literary and typographical staff of the Napier Evening News send kindly greetings to the Observer staff, and wish them health and prosperity during the coining year.' So runs a card to hand. We reciprocate the good wishes of our smart Napier contemporary, and lifting the crystal goblet we always keep handy, to our lips, drink success to it ! — Lady Martin (known to fame as Miss Victoria Woodhull, of Woman's Rights — with a capital E— notoriety, has just issued a leaflet entitled: ' Stirpiculture ; or the Scientific Propagation of the Human Race.' Lady Martin feels compelled to call upon the Government to incorporate as part of its laws the following commandments : — ' Thou shalt not marry when malformed or diseased.' ' Thou Bhalt not L>roduco His image in ignorance.' Thou shalt not defile His temple.' We don't envy ' Lord ' Martin. Victoria must be trying at times. — Jas. W. Browne, of Dotriot. U.S., determined to satisfy himself by personal experience as to whether marriage 'was a failure or the roverse. led thirty three blushing brides — one after the other and at intervals, of course — to the altar. His modus operand i was to advertise for a housekeeper, select one from the numerous applicants, marry her, live with her for a week or two, and then clear out. Pfteen of his victims appeared as witnesses against him, and it is not surprising that the jury only took four minutes to deliberate before bringing in a verdict of guilty. Sentence was deferred. — That eccentric Wellington party, John Smith Harris, alais ' the Whiffler,' has been distinguishing himself again. 'I his time he was pulled up for parading the streets in a black bonnot, trimmed with artificial flowers, trousers ' a cross between a pair of drawers and a clown's pantaloons ' and stockings of a bright roae-pink, while a carrot was stuck in his button-hole. ' I'll prove,' said the Whiffier in Court, ' that these are not ladies' garments,' and then walking up to the Bench with the dual garments in his hand, he said : ' Sir ! So far as I know, ladies' garments are not made like these.' This was received with shouts of laughter in which the magistrate joined. The Whiffler explained that he was acting as a walking advertisement for a masquerade tailor, and claimed the right to ' go on doing it,' so long as decency was observed. He got off. — Au excited middle- aged female carry ing a baby in her arms recently stuck up a wellknown Aucklander in Queen-street, and shaking her fist iv his face exclaimed in a shrill falsetto .• 'Oh I've found you at last, have IP Oh, you willin' ! Aint you ashamed of yourself ? Do you know whose this is ?' (indicating the little j stranger) oh you precious scamp ! Oh ' ' My good lady ' said the party addressed, with characteristic coolness?, ' I really think you must have made a mistake.' 'No mistake at all, you vagabone ; dont you try to impose on me!' 'But really' The perfect coolness, of the supposed delinquent struck the woman. Moderating her tone somewhat she said : ' A int your name Johnsing ?' ' Not that lam aware of. I have always been under the impression that my name was Smith. I could have wished for a cognomen less common but realy I didn't have mnch say in the matter.' ' And you mean to tell me that your name isn't Johnsing ?' ' Certainly I do— and here comes a friend of mine who will confirm what I say.' Then she was convinced, and with an apologetic smile went on to sajhow hard it was. That villain Johnsing had escaped her, so far, but she would find him yet. And with a snort of determination she went away. There is a bad quarter of an hour awaiting Johnsing when she unearths him