PEOPLE WHO WOULD NOT BE MISSED.

Observer, Volume 7, Issue 338, 30 May 1885, Page 16

PEOPLE WHO WOULD NOT BE MISSED.

A few more names I wish to place on " KoKo's" little list, Of people whoni I am positive never would be missed — There's that dreadful fellow - lodger who thinks that he can sing ; All ladies who keep poodle dogs (let's throw the poodles in) ; Men who know you in the country, but cut you in the street ; The man who wrote "Grandfather's Clock"; all women with cold feet ; The man who carries round the plate, and will wear squeaky, long boots ; Those scourges of society: the folks who borrow books ; The insurance wretch who dogs you with Ms tables and his list — They'd none of 'em be missed ; they'd none of 'em be missed. There's the local politician and others of his breed ; Brother Thomas, the evangelist (I've got him. on the list) ; The friend who wants your signature to help him in his need — They never would be missed ; they never would be missed. Then the simpering young lady who comes round with a list, And requests a small donation for a children's Sunday feast ; The unmitigated nuisance who swings back in. in his chair ; i All Scotchmen with an accent; all women V with red hair ; : All idiots who upon (( equality " and " rights of man " insist — They'd njne of 'em be missed ; they'd none of 'em be missed. The man who says "Good morning— fine weather is it not ? But we want a little rain, but we want a little rain ; " That medical practitioner who always will talk shop ; The man who tells you funny stories when you're travelling in a train (I was pretty nearly puttiug William Garrard on the list, But perhaps he might be missed, perhaps he might be missed) ; There's the fussy man in an omnibus, who is much afraid of draughts ; All stout, bald-headed men with pompous little coughs ; , Those would-be perfect orators who when. speaking icill say " 'jist " — They'd none of 'em be missed ; they'd none ■ of 'em be missed. There's the tourist who dilates upon the wonders of the Lakes ; The man who was going by the Tararua, but was just an hour too late ; And dead-heads, two-thirds of 'em, I've got 'em on the list — I don't think they'd be missed; I'm surfe they'd not be missed. There's the man, sir, who remembers Auckland forty years ago ; And the invalid who tells you that he feels just "so-so;" The wife who wants to be taken out on. Sunday afternoon ; And your neighbour who owns the wretched cur that howls so at the moon ; Men who never look you in the face, and ladies with a lisp — They'd none of 'em be missed, they'd none of 'em be missed. , ■ Dennis.,