HAPPY THOUGHTS AT THE THAMES.

Thames Star, Volume VII, Issue 1995, 27 May 1875, Page 2

HAPPY THOUGHTS AT THE THAMES.

After a clay's desultory walking, lo say nothing of promiscuous " stone-fences/ one is apt. to feel tired and hungry; at least, I am on ray arrival in a 'bus at the hotel. By-thc-bye, on my way home I made.friends with the driver of the 'bus, or whatever name f.he nondescript vehiclo j in which I was conveyed rocs by, and i found out the real name of the place I j had been to. It is Par-away. I know I shall remember the. name, because it rhymes to far-away; and when I was a small boy I remember I was obliged to say a hymn in which the latter word constantly occurred.* In fact, during part of the journey home I caught myself humming the tune, and saying—

Now, I am coming from Par— Pa.-a.vi'.y. I didn't get beyond this ; but it is extraordinary how one remembers things which were done when one was yeung. Happy thought! Write a book on " Youthful JJeminisrnces," and give this about Par-away as an instance in point. I will. Dinner time, i.e., dinner or tea I don't know which—there is a great deal of-meat eaten, which suggests dinner; and a great deal of tea disposed of, which points to a tea. Wo are disposed of at various small tables, and I dispose of a really good steak, and feel much better. All this disposing reminds one 1 of ; the French verbs—l dispose, you dispose, &c. I own I am rather anxious as to where I shall sleep to-night;,so I enquire at the bar of the waiteri who informs me I am to have a room to myself. Also, that it is a holiday to-morrow, being Queen's birbhday, and there will be lots to do and see. lam glad toiear this. 'I hadoiten heard'at home how loyal tho Colonials were; arid now I shall sco it, and their method of evincing it. Happy thought! Holiday to-morrow'■; Colonial loyalty. Happier thought! Boom, to (myself. Happiesttliought! Bed. • i

Monday, May 24.^1 have had a very good night on the whole, though I do wish they would provide locks to these bed-rooms, especially when there arc people staying in the house who come in late and don't know their number. The only way I could fasten mine was by placing my chair against it, which certainly was not a happy'thought, for I also placed my watch, candlestick, note-book and glass of water on the chair, and some one in the middle of the night, who did not know his number, would open the door, knocked over the chair, and watch, glass of water, and everything else are all sent to the floor. He growled' out

something, and then proceeded to try every other door in the same way, going, I suppose, on the exhaustive process. I imagine he was going on until ho found some bed empty. I daresay if he had found mine empty he would have got into it. How awful it would be on-re-

turning home late to find somebody else in your bed. I remember all this as I am gradually getting awake in the morning, and then I suddenly remember it is the Queen's birthday, and a public holiday. Happy thought—out of bed; dress quickly ; then for colonial loyalty with all the Inn, flags, shooting, Volunteer firing, decorations, with." God Save the Queen," and all that sort of-thing. Happy thought — get my .note book ready and dot clown all 1 see ! I have had my breakfast and do not feel much inspirited. I hare seen no flags,yet, and the town is much the same cs yesterday, except that there are no shops open. It also looks like rain. I - suggest this to ihe waiter; he sajs, "Yes, it most always do rain on the Queen's birthday." Another gentleman. says sompthing about " having a bit of a damper." Now I happen to know that word " damper is colonial" for flour and water, boiled or baked or made into bread somehow, and Idon't seewhatthathas todo with the Queen's Birthday unless it is an old custom to eat damper on the Queen's Birthday. It may be. The waiter tells me that?there is to be a pigeon; match^at one o'clock. I hare heard there is to be; and so I say,- "Oh ! You mean at Paraway," to show him I knew how to pronounce the word. He says, yes, at Parawai, and does not seem to take any notice of my skill in mastering the language; this is disheartening.! It doescome onto rain in accordance with its custom on Queen's Birthday; and the streets seem getting muddier, and muddier—the people, dirtier and dirtier every minute ; however, I must see what the Volunteers are like. So I go. The rain holds off a little, and I find about 150 men and 30 boys drawn up in the mud inside a shed (wooden) being inspected. There are different uniforms, be first arc evidently meant to the Scots of some clan or other, and to carry out this idea, about a yard (more or less) of some tartan-colored stuff is fastened to the left' shoulder of each man, and again somewhere about his back ; as to using it for a plaid, no one could ever dream of such a thing. Happy thought — for commanding officer— " might do as a comforter." Of the men some wear kilts and some do not. The one piper varies the different shades of the inrtans by wearing a kilt of I (think) the bright colored " Eoyal Stuart;" while he has an admirable . foil in the drummer, who appears in the ordinary great coat and trousers of every day life. They are all in line and o"bey (to me) unintelligible orders,: which result m etch man putting a cap,on hi 3 rifle and pointing it direct! v at " vi "■ who are just opposite to them," Then the officer says something about » don't put: any ammunition in." Horrid thought—suppose one should! More horrid thought—suppose the man: opposite me should! Very happy thought —get behind tbo first big man I see;! After all no one did put in any ammunition, so I rather wish I had -not got behind some ono else. . Jfc seems^a- very easy thing to be a commanding officer, all you have to do is to say .something and then make a great noise, like a?half grunt-a short half grunt from the f chest, something like the word o-o-oO!-And you are immediately-obeyed; And; we could easy learn some words of command. Happy thought—buy a book with words of command a»d learn them, then practice the grunt, and then be a commanding officer. Howevpr ij; doesn't niatter af they are all off tp the;" wharf to fire the salute. First, howeyer, I hear that Naval Brigade will fireataplacc "just close, by." I get to the place "just close-by, and, as 1 am anxious to see everything, X take my stand with some others qn a | high pile, fif wqqd which gcem? s.pm.ewkat insecure and slippery, but I will keep ia good look out and watch the two guns, at each of which a man is rtanding holding a piece of string; what for I don't know.

As I am watching one man pulls his string and the gun goes off; this so startles me that I give a small jump, miss my fooling on the slippery logs, and rollincontinently to the ground bringing.'with me several logs and much mud. , However I risd again on the logs in 1 time to sco the other string pulled, but nothing follows as I here my neighbor say "missed fife;" however, I give another little jump in expect tation which unsettles the log under me, and I feel myself slipping down. Happy thought—catch hold of my neighbor! Thi3 I do, but it only makes tHe log roll more swiftly, and detaches others, and in two seconds I am on my back in the mud with the man and several logs on top of Bje,-/ The man is very angry; I think I ffhomcl';be if "I had been pulled into the mud, but I apologise profusely and wipe off somo of his mud—at least I attempt to, but, as ho says I am only making it worse, I didn't. Happy thought—see the rest standing on the ground. Tho gun No. 2has gone off by this time, ,and now .!Np. 1 refuses tp go off." At length, after being repeatedly re-capped and " seen to," it condcecends... to do so, and the "salute of 21 guns'" is over. I see the other • volunteers, wbo have all this time., betftt^waiting on the wharf, commence their display of loyalty, which also consists in firing. They discharge their'rifles at intervals and then retire. I follow the Navals down* one muddy, street,-to the left by a muddier, and back again to the, shed by the muddiest, being joined onitte. way by the riflemen—this concluded tWJpV display of loyalty. "Tell it not.to the* " Illustrated" London News ;" and, as I am wet, cold, hungry and dirty, I go back to the Hotel. Happy thought. Luncheon. I don't think I shall go to the pigeon match this afternoon,: but, as there are plenty of pheasants to be' ihot, will try and go shooting instead, to-r morrow. v '•.-'