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Thames Star, Volume VII, Issue 1980, 12 May 1875, Page 4

The Latest Smail-pox Joke.-—-The Cincinnati Saturday JSight, has the smallpox joke in a new form:—"yesterday; morning a nice young man got into a car on the Dayton Short-line [Railroad, and saw to his delight the pnly'vacant seat in the coach was by the side of a young lady acquaintance. He reached for that seat with joyous strides, and her eyes answered his delighted looks; but just before he got there an elderly party from the other end of the car waltzed up the aisle and dropped into the coveted seat, The you ng man approached more slowly and accosted the young lady. * How is your brother ?' he asked; 'ia he able to get out ?' ' Oh, ve3,' she said. • Will he be badly marked ?' he continued; and the old gentleman grew "suddenly interested. - * Oh, no,' said the fair deceiver; • with the exception of a few small pits on the forehead you would not know he had ever had it.' 'Were you not afraid of taking it ?' the young man went on, while the old gentleman broke out in a cold prespiration. ' "Not at all,' she replied; ' I have been vaccinated, you know.' The seat was vacated instantly, two young hearts beat as half a dozen, and the prattle of ' nice talk' strewed that part of the car, while' a grey-haired old man scowled upon them from the hard ■ accommodation of the wood-box, . Matrimonial Felicity.—A receatlymade Benedict writes as follows concerning his young wife's habits :—" If there were a bedroom a mile long, and her entire wardrobe could be packed in a candlebox, still you'd find portions of that . wardrobe scattered along the whole mile of. dressingroom. She's a nice thing to look at when- put together, but this , wonderful creature is evolved fromva ! chaos interminable of pins, ribbons, rags, powder, thread, brushes, combs, and laces. If there were 7,000 drawers in your room,' and.y©u asked but one to bo kept sacred, and inviolate for your private use, that particular one would be full of hair-pins, ribbons and soiled cuffs. Some provision, some protection in this matter, should be < inserted in the marriage service." The " Pound of Flesh."—Mincemeat. .Light Chabacmbbs. — Persons with Ootk souls. How to Meet a Mait on Poubtful Cbedit."-Take no note of him. LrcHTiSMADBD.—A street lamp. .ta/r.i'.HMii. . ■ ■ - ■