Topics in Brief:

Timaru Herald, Volume CXLIII, Issue 20896, 27 November 1937, Page 12

Topics in Brief:

Readers are invited to furnish for publication in this column, pertinent and witty extracts (the briefer the better), from newspaper and magazine articles, such as: Pedestrians should be seen and not hurt.—“Stewart-Warnerite.” It’s a lot easier to attract attention than to earn respect.—“Labour Leader.” You can always tell when you are on the wrong road, there are no detour signs.—“Whilsitt Impress.” Anyone who takes a fisherman’s word finds that fish grow faster out of water than in it.—“ Los Angeles Times." * * * * What would be a reasonable hourly rate of reading the widely circulated political propaganda?. “Detroit News.” • 1 • • » Vegetables are being omitted from the menu at a Continental prison as a punishment for disturbances. Ne peas for the wicked!” —"Humorist.” Blessed are the nobodies. The calamities that befall great nations are brought about by great men.—"St. Louis Star-Times." Ending of the barber strike in New York will give patrons a chance to catch up in their old magazine reading.—“Philidelphia Evening Bulletin.” Washington, we read, is without any adequate air practices. Now surely this must mean aviation and not “hot air" —"Memphis Commercial Appeal.” The national Inventors’ congress, we see, has on display a tearless onionslicer. Now won’t the tree people accommodate us with a weepingless willow?—"Baltimore Evening Sun.”

After all, Uncle Sam did not fare so badly on the fifteenth of June; the 80 nice instalment payments from little Finland and the little taxpayers.—" The New Yorker.”

"Relatives trying to break the will of an Illinois woman who died at 74, have testified that she fell asleep at lectures.” —News item. The defence rests! —“Atlanta Constitution.”

Why is it that a humorist can grind out reams and fairly readible stuff in the course of a year, yet cannot think of anything funny to put on a vacation card—“St. Louis Star-Times." * * ♦ * Everybody is joking about the things the women are calling hats this season. One favourite remark is that now it is Queen Mary’s turn to laugh.—‘Los Angeles Times’*

Xs the new arms race grows hotter abroad, the diplomatic repartee grows blunter. There is taunting to-night on the old campground.—‘Portland Oregonian.”

Henry Ford’s new car is to have a motor in the rear. Many fathers who get their driving directions from the back scat think its enough to have the mater back there.—“ Evening News.”