"A Nine Days Wonder."

Timaru Herald, Volume XIIC, Issue 13655, 25 July 1908, Page 1 (Supplement)

"A Nine Days Wonder."

(By' Clotilda Graves.) " Carrier'—Woa! Carrier 1" The man' pulled up short recognising Comfort. A par eel for Battkborough?" "4v" said Mercv Comfort with a cheery laugh, b ruk * n ofi 6nort '"r J, iffi byV.sigh. "'Ay, Ma.Ur- Tubb and I-be the par^l "Step in woman," said the earner, hi*, '.beaten features relating in a friendly grin as the comely, ruddj, portly. Mrs. Comfort handed up two laige-hd-Z& baskets for safe "t the back of the eeat wbi.h atcommoda.ed Tubb ..n; one pa.seng.r- "Shall 1 W \^^[ . he-added, as Mrs. Comfort deliberate!} placed a plump cloth-booted foot upon the high step of th* light two-wheeled cart-and heaved a sigh preliminary to the act of climbing. "Vou baint so lissome nor so jnmpsome as ye wan a dozen years back." . "The more pity for me,' said Mrs. Comfort, as she landed creakingly upon the seat,-, and the horse moved on at a dower trot- "Me that have left my husband's roof to toil and mod for my living under another man's, if he is my son-in-law, George Daisy." "Drabbit, my dear ears, do I hear ye rizbt?" gasped astonished Mr. Tubb. "You the wife of the well-tb-doest man in Cressbrook. Wi" a house of «gW rooms on the Dormister Road, bndt out o' your savins an' comforts when ve was krtchen-hall, cookmaid, and over to Orion College, Bonrford, for twenty veans! 'T« not pcsibte but jou bTa-tying in jes„, as betwi* od tends is allowable. Ha. »»», ha! Mr. 1«W» relaxed his mouth for ihe iWl.herat« purpose of laughter. It tell open, and stayed comely re Comfort, after vainly fumbling for a pocket upon which she wa*> Stttoff. wiped tearful eyes openly ™ t]l a Dair of cotton gloves. 'That house we budt mad- our Inst fall out," she sighed. "We was to make back our lay out by letting lodgens to summer visitors what had come down fiom London and such dry places to look ab th' river all day till time come for em to get back again. And comfort goes and builds our house fawn the dusty hiffh road, an' wi' but one -wmdoer ye can see th' Tiver out o\ and that belongs to Rubeola's three-cornered little upstairs rooin wi* no fireplaee to it, because the money gave out.an' we had to fill up the chimney-flue wi* a block of cement. Times and time I tells Comfort what a wicked lie the name 'River Tiew' looks painted on the gat* pillars, an' what a sin ot judgement he have committed; and lie rounds on me that is he's a fool, hes but the match for me, seeing that Ive taken in earnest! what a young gentleman at the University told me in jest, and christened my only daughter by'the Latin name that goes for measles of the German kind." Her fresh face screwed i'celf up in preparation for a burst of tears. Tubb whipped the horse. "But, may I be b.essed, Mrs. Comfort, if you've told me why you've got to earn your living wi' Rubeola an' her husband For I don't go to believe that the old ding-dong quarrel balween ye, about the no-view tto th.' house-winders and Rubeola's measley name, which has been above-abit popular wi' the labourers' ■wives since ye settled here in Cressbrook —I don't go t' believe that Comfort an' you ha' parted on that account, now." •'But you must believe it," said Mrs Comfort, crying, "when I toll's y* so." "Now I jcig my thoughts," reflected Mr. Tubb, "Comfort" made a hit o' popular gossip, last Wensday were a wick, by Btoppin' away from Miss Rubeola's weddin' wi' George Daisy." •'Be —hoo—'cause he said at the J.ir.t minute he—boo —wouldn't' (stand up in church to give away German measles to George Daisv." sobbed Mrs Comfort. "And when George"'told him plump and. plain he'd, have the girl, and glad and «t„,T,t-ftil was smallpox, an' dipthey —he—hoo!—he ordered George Daisy to leave his house. An' when I told him it was my house as much as his, because my - good money had come out. o' bank to help to build it, he dared me to prove it, an' how can I, seeing he always banks jay money wi' his own.' - "Xch-tch!" said the carrier, clicking hie tongue against his palate, partly as an expression of sympathy with his passenger, partly as a stimulating hint to the |

horse. ' . ... , "An* then -we tried to ha' the weddin wi'out him," sighed Mrs. Comfort, "and when we come back from church to 'River View"—though that name upon the gateposts is a wicked deception and an evil snore, as I've tild Comfort " "Well well," said the carrier, "when ye came home from the cake an* wine-— '* "There wasn't no caks, nor no wine,'

cobbed Mrs. Comfort-. "Comfort had took 'em and hid 'em in the hayloft. An' us bad to eat his bread an' cheese an* ginger biscuits, an' George Daisy's father proposed 'Long life an' happiness to the bride and bridegroom' in mild ale from the 'Pure Pint.' An' th' disgrace is told by every tongue in Cressbrook, as I told Comfort it. would be. An' he growed that mean and nagging in h:s ways that I savs to him, '1 will arise an* go to my daghter, an' he told me to go an'

'be jiggered.* Hoo! hoof "Heart alive! there's a man hardened in e* wickedness!" 6aid Tubb. '-But he'll send an' be ve to come back again—opinion 'lt be too set agen him. even him, even in th' "Pure Pint,' for him tot : d» comfort in th' company there—he 11 be drove home, and an empty house to a talkative mart in—well •" - "My dear soul!" cried Mrs. Comfort, putting her wet gloves back in one of her baskets, "Comfort- 'll be at no less for company, doan't ye think it. He goes an pus wi' thp old pony Toby i the stabie when he feel dnil-like, an' talks away to him by the hour together. An an intelligent heart it is I dare E ay an Id hardly be astonished, nor would Comfort nether, for oft-a-time he've faid so, if Toby didn't up an' answer h.m Christian English one o' these days. "Where bs Comfort now? asked Tufabs, his leathery wrinkling with "-Gone to the 'Pure Pint,'" said his wife, "an he won't be back till rt falls a "Do ye keep stable door locked," asked

Tubb, -widening bis leathery gnn. "Whv no!" returned the simple woman, "o course not. Who 'ud go ito steal 0l "I T £t' a rich man," pursued Tubb after a pa**- " You know % T T™!*?away fronv home i' my youth an took do the voices beautiful, an earned a good Ho' money, but I never had the luck to lam to keep it, an' that*jh»£ Ito the Cressbrook earner i my old age. mat I save is this-I've a idear, Mr* romfort for bringing you • an' comfort X together. If I can work it out you £ffl aire me a sovereign to ids my rent? "A. sovereign seems such a mmt. to pay for gittTn' a man "like Comfort back again? sighed Mrs. Comfort. wi hvoice an' wicked ways an all "TO do it for fifteen shdlms, then, bargained Tubb. "Shan't tell ye how, nor are ye to tell Comfort what you and me hare planned to br.ng about, But The drives Toby in to fetch you back from Battleborougb before twelve noon to-morrow, the moneys m.ne Hey '•I couldn't manage more than ten stmlin" said Mrs. Comfort, shaking her head "an' for that ye' G to put a roaeUe in Toby's bridle and a cuchion in tt.

* "Soul of me! but vou're a bargainer," caid Tubb: but he accepted the matrons Srms, and a* he set her down at Rudeola'a door he called back over his shoulder as the cart rattled away. "Don't unpack more than ye'll need for the night.' £Trs. * Comfort observed secrecy and

spent a bad night in consequence. The guest chamber of-Rubeolas, cottage had been hastily furnished with articles borrowed from the kitchen, • and • bedroom of the young couple, and the chair-bed-stead key having been mislaid, it remained- a chair. "We'll send for Tom Dill, the blacksmith, to wrench it open," said Mr. Daisy, as he rapturously watched Rubeola pouring out the breakfast coffee. "An' if Tom can't—why, ye nnietf just put' up wi' it. My mother, ao had the ashmy cruel bad for in her la»u year*, slep' in a chair for three of \-m. What ba you watchin' th' winder for?*' Mrs. Comfort withdrew her Daisy betook himself to work, after a lingering purling with Rubeola, and the morning crawled by in a procession of weeks until twelve, when Rubeola uttered a shriek of surprise. "Here's the chaise wi' Toby, an' father driving. My heart alire, look at the rosette on the bridle, an' the - sofa-cushion on the spare seat. As cure as beans, he's come to take you home. "Be mother "here?" somewhat- gruffly demanded Mr Comfort, ar> his daughter dished down the garden path. ''Tell her to put her bonnet on an' come home wi' me to once." "Why won't yon come in, father ?" asked Rubeola. "He said I was to take her homo an' not stop, 'case me and George gat quarrelling," said red-faced, twinkling-eyed Mr. Comfort. "He says I'm too prone to pick quarrels—that's what he cays." "Who said -that?" queried Rubeola. "Never you mind, miss.' said her father, with a slight access of snappishness. "Woa there, woa, Toby!" he urged caressingly. "I wasn't going to becall Rubeo-la—-don't ve think it. Woa, woa!"

"Lor", dad, you don't suppose Tcby taker; notice of what you say to me?" gasped the Tecent Miss Comfort. "Don't, he?" asked Mr. Comfort, darkly. "Lcok at his ears! Yon go an' hurry mo'her. Tell her I shan't wait if she keeps me dum-fooling much longer. No—don't tbll her that. Woa, then—Toby ! woa !"

"Come along, Sarah!" cried Mr. Comfort, loudly. "I be a-coming, father," cried she, placidly.

She mounted into the chaise dutifully hoisted by Rubeola, and conjugally hauled by her husband, and the two miles that divided Battle-borough, and the village of Cressbrook was traversed in silence They passed the "Pure Pint," and drew up before a hideous lhtle yellow villa. As in a dream, Mrs. Comfort allowed Mr. Comfort to help her down. As one heholding a vision, she wo'cried him lead the pony away to the stable. "Well. I never," she murmured fo herself. "Well. I nev— —" "I'll trouble you for mv ten shillings, Mrs. Comfort, ma'am," said Tnbb's voice, clo«e at her ear.

"Why, wherever dirl ye spring from?" 6he exclaimed.

"From the tap-room of the 'Pure Pint," said Mr. Tubb, with a k-a'hery grin. "where wo shan't have the satisfaction of seeing your good gentlemnn so often, ma'am, since he' 6 swore off gin cold and taken to lemon an' bitter."

"'Tis impossible I" gasped Mrs. Comfort. s

"Ask the pony, ma'am," said Tubb, coolly, "if you doubt-, me !"

"'Ask the—pony?" gasped Mrs. Comfort.

"Last night," said Mr. Tr>bb. "when Comfort came home and set down in the stable along wi' Toby to smoke his pipe, Toby spoke to him !" "Gracious!" gasped Mrs. Comfort, with round eves.

"Spoke to him in good English, 100, thongh wi' a voice like a tVavellin' Punch as one tin whistle he like another," 6aid the cunning Mr. Tubb. "Dear m»!" ejaculated Mrs. Comfort. "Dear me!"

"Says Comfort, wi' his <=y/i? poppin' nut of his head— nam Comfort when he did get breath enough to speak; 'Sir "i "He didn't- never call the pony 'Sir!' " protested Mrs. Comfort.

"He did," eaid Mr. Tubb. '"Sir, I 'ad no idea I was doin' anything objectionable to you personally, and I promise yon if you don't do what you've threatened'— for Toby had told him that, if he didn't reform at once, he'd upset his-hoofs—'if yon don't do what- you've- threatened, I promise solemly to amend.' 'Will you swear that?' snv:> Toby in the Punch voice. So Comfort go*vi down on his kneef "

"Oh!" panted Mrs. Comfort.. "Xever on his knees—l can't believe it."

"On his knees he gofi" —and swears. 'There's another thing you've got to do,' says Toby, keeping his head over the manger and his tail to Comfort, content nt-uors-like. "What's that. <>ir?" asks the old man. 'This house makes me want to kick my shoes off.' says Tobv, 'whenever I'm driven up to it. Alter the. back—put some bow windows in, and make a real river view of it, or paint on.'-, the name on the gateposts and call it "Turnip View" instead." And the old man pinniped for re-building—so—my ten shillings are wellearned, arentf they ?" "You—don't—mean—to—'ell—me," said Mrs. Comfort, with a panr.e between every word." that von hid in the "

"The hav loft, just over the manager," nodded Tubb. "An* did the speaking for Toby?" said the matron faintly, as she drew out her purse. Mr. Tubb winked and drawing a small tin instrument from his waistcoat pocket, placed it in his mouth. Instantly tb<! long-drawn squeak of Punch greeted Mrs; Comfort's ears. A piece of harness dropped in the stable yard close by, the voice of Mr. Comfort was uplifted, addressing Toby in soothing ton<"s. "Woa, Toby, woa!" he said, conxingly. "You can't have nothing to complain of. Ain't I kep' my word to the letter—cushion and rosette" an' all? An' the builder's comin' to-morrow about them bows. Woa, pony, woa I"