"MODERN MARRIAGE."

Timaru Herald, Volume XIIC, Issue 13638, 4 July 1908, Page 7

"MODERN MARRIAGE."

AND HOW TO BEAR IT. ' ]n the book—'" Modern Marriage aiiu How Lo Bear it," Xighe Hopkins says rhab Mrs iiiaby is colloquial, ciear-miud-eu, &i.iioi:t, au.iiuiouis, aua eminent iv .lice iK.iu iiK-j Jjiji y*. blie believes av>. n'iae in ivtx-juyc- Uis JJI lias 1.0 mole sympathy w'jJu me gir» uno sought a lui&tianuv "lor tile tumeutence of uaving room iur my clothes' titan with the weil-io-do bachelor who "cannot, allord" a wile. Ihe hflrbbands club aic legaiuii as "an unalloyed blessing" to the home-; and lie lhisband hinuelr she wornd legate with a little iiattery ill »;aso.i, aiiu a mile appi ojjriule- banter when lie- toggles at th& bits. ".N ever cry' is-her auvice, in italics, to the wife; and to young ladits having matrimony in view she recommends a preliminary canuir, or aiueliymeneul fling, as much knowledge of the other fcex as can with modesty come by and some triflyiug skill in. accounts;llie Old, Old Story. Oh- love, Mrs Braby lets fall - a few very peranent sayings, and they are proper to her subject, a.beit Jove and marriage arc nob exactly synonymous terms. In England itself (where, eveu in our day, there is probably more of romantic love than in any ether' -country in tlie world) marriages do 110 L really happen . because young pi-ople are whac is called "in lov*e" with one another, blit because the marketfor cotton goods its a- little higher .than Übual, or wool is exceptionally hrm. ihe price Of corn is not unconnected Wi h this ri»e -or fall' iti* tl/tf'iiiardag\? 'rate. i F 'lace were suddenly to lose' its' value, comparatively few persons would be seriously in love with one another in Nottiigliam. 1 here is a mysterious thing called law of Averages, and it is in blind obedience to this law' that a certain number -il the population are annually run over, b > mothanged for inuraer,. whitewashed. in the bankruptcy Court, and united in bonds of .holy matrimony. In a moie scientific ajge, , novelists - will begin the chapter thtiifr describes the wedding, with a, reference to the Bank Rate, and tlie latest returns of the' department on .the duties of which Mr. Winston . Churchill liius at last- been permitted to- enter: • 'I hose' Selfish Men. • ... v : ■

Are men less prone, to love than, of old—to the serious . love that Jeads, or may . lead, to matrimony,? .'. Mrs. Braby is- severe on the. teliisliiiess of ..the iiex. lhe man. will not consent,to'go t-o a- cheaper tailor,...to leave off. .dining expensively, to ;econcinise in golf , ballsj to his WtvvViid in Paris. This comes of. living iu civilised society. The .eligible savage is "more or less' compelled to marry, and he who■ does. not. and .will not. is, practically ■ sent to. Coventry;. ; Here, where we liuve not yet lhe courage to .put'a-tax, on bacliHlbis. the; tendency of tie man fairly well off is .to marry late'and; later '.-- . The -.woman, on the . other hanil, i.ays Mis; Braby, is as anxious as- ever -for wedded.life. But surely we get some. Vciy mixed opinions on Uiispciini ;i often' as it-' comes up for discussion in the/'newspapers. I remember- a grand correspondence oil it soine: years' ago,-- under the' heading of "Matrimonial Agencies," . The British girl- of. the period was very v jnubh in the front- of- this. ;-Every day for six wooks she went up on the editor's housetop and called, the- young man of the period all tlie names.she could think of. blie did not,-hesitate'.to uay that all her school eompaiiions \vh6 had married had'grown iiitd • jpitiable objects,.- witu:A their.-.: babies and ; their, cheaj) carpets. >,.-.<«• • (Spinster and Bachelor.

'Nothing, «slie ,declared, tihould.. induce her to- marry, and in-tlie same breath she abused-her brother for never bringing his bachelor fnendii home in . the evening. The scrupulous editor, allowed a word to everybody, and ainlost everybody . took advantage :of . his kindntss'. A ne«,iy-married, wile, said that she had trapped her game at a last year's picnic, whereinion a spinster" ret-orted that she had been to sixteen picnics in a- season," and had nothing to snow for them," but rliemiiatism. Under cover of the pseudohyin mothers showed the arts "by. which Uiey liad striven, tt> get their daughters tiff tneir hands. Many bkchelors avowed that tliey dreaded matrimony becau.se, wherever they ' went, tlity . heard wives imartening up their husbands and keeping them home at night Mrs; .Braby, one feels - sure, .would be in favour of.'sin'ariening up husbands, but' she of chaining them to the. hea.rth . seven ilights a week. • . Tlie right' to choose a- hiate, she insists, should be open to all adults, ahd this right': "will pfi.i'sibly bs '\aciknowledged in the future, when the woman question-.shall be set ''at rest for ever." Obviously, theie is- nothing more, degatory in .staling—-whether-iir print: or. by: any o; her' that./you-'are'.'-willingaild • anxious to marry, "than'there is-in getting i-lieuuiat-fcni' '••at''sixtecii.vpi(jnii-S'.' with tlie .same ob-. ject uriavo.wed. > The' marriage that is grounded,; not in passion, nor in ■ interest; but .iir-''.'-affection,-: finds -in .'.j&lib. Braby a sane ' tipd Ktreijuoiis .'advocate. Let us, she says 1 liave- an' Institution for Encouragiiig Matrimony—wlrich would be a .Matrimonial' Aiency - under another name. Ceil- - doing all we can to disthe: unfit,, let -us encourage tlie fit '.(in ; the wcrdtf -of Pope) to "take tilieir pun'ishinerit into their.own liandb.'' .• 'ln'/the course,of the discussion 'o wliich refeienncd' Jias bsen promoter of companies;, urged the of ".i fioiind *ma I rmionial company," with ."a. strong, and representative.' board■ of-, directors :' consisting :of ~ those anxious tb marry." By. all means;.; if Mrs.. Chuiion Braby could'- be-persuaded t-o ;tiiks, a seat! But ib4fore tlie beard is her, book liiuei be; read.- - ,