THE STEPMOTHER.

Taranaki Herald, Volume LV, Issue 13947, 30 April 1909, Page 4

THE STEPMOTHER.

Ih.i. ■> ,v l\ » mnii delicate sitna'i'Hj iij .ill .ii.. i> tiiar oi siepmot hei T^ic'i is : n inii'i'i |iiijii(!uc in th*' iinnji itui'.i ,i i ,..ni'-i lu-i null ilii'ic is ,iiii. h iti t,r -ml li'iin tui and against i !.r |v t ,(,i' 111 1 ian lie no stnecuie to mi. l on. ,i Ii , ilre, i.l' iv possession oi a iaiiiil.\ thai in. i (ii ma y not be an at-ii-.icy\e one 111 1 is (ilifii said "she knew whit she wits umlei taking," but did -.In -" I) > we ,m\ ut I! 1 - ie:ilis(\ even i, iih .in ouhnaiv niaivi.ij!!', entirely \\hi\t h> a 1 .' nuclei t.iUnj/. J And the stepmolhi i otten has bitter pnjildicoß ID O\ t'l ("nine . (ilej'idlce- seldom hoi 11 in the ]»n»il t\\ eluUlien tlum-ehes, ba* slimrisl'd .'.llvl tcsteicd by s ( ji,iilt^ and ul.'tiDlis and v.M'.ille'l U lends. '1 lie "ponr lttle l.niili is oiten undiily pitied b\ the nur-e who has read linn oi liei tii.mv :i gi iK'sonie lairy-tale .lliont "wicked si(.j)inotlii«is," Imt the ■ poor lambs' i :in a bet ir r ehaii<-e of being liappier under the cue <>t the <\om:in w ho lo'-es (lieu (athei than with i he unman who losteis a looltsh pieju<l\a> I speak with authority oi the Uiik ot stepmother-,. 1 >r 1 am the I'ji'kv poi-.ewu ol one - v ho is a living ( \ miple ol th<« lo\e and respect that cm n fo-esisl null slcpiuottici ship, and \< honi I !i-\e more diarly t)..ni 1 can i yen say. l»ut :i|>ntt ironi ptisoiul obteivation, I think one <>i the most trying i luniks a stepmother has to put up with is l he lather of her ready-made family. A u'douer n so used to family life that he Marts without the glai .our of romance that 'els us women l.'i'iitlv clow n mt'> the- iiit> oi the commonplace. 1 do not v\ lsli to deny widowers, but liny are seldom romantic when thej ))os-?ess a f.innlv, and v.c w.iincn U)\f lomance. Il is one ol oil! liner and more leautiliil liistiiuts to lovo sentimeiii and to pl.uooiif lowr on a. pedesnl. 1 may be wioiij^, but it seems to lie th,>( it would be \ cry difficult to pi-iee — or at any rale Keep — a married man with «ever.il children on si pedestal. Stepmothers are usually a much malin<red ( las^. \linnst all women arr instinctively tender towards young and helpless children üm! k ivo °."t freely lo\e and sen ice, receiving in returr. sometimes merely the dry husks of ingintitude Unt'it is when the famil> are mi owing up that she has to try and lne down a veritable antipathy, for she ]':m rot only to adapt herself to the new and sli.irigp hie \. ith the man she has married, but to overcome dislike and resentment. She has to put up uith the constant picsenco oi people she does not want, and who do not, want her, and she can seldom f<et the man she lo\es entirely to heiselt. Sometimes grown tcp girls ;»»»] boy» will set the sweetest and most lovin<i 'Stepmother at dofianee and treat hei from the outset as an enemy and a usurper. H here are stepmothers who impatient or this injustice, retaliate ;>:ul the breach grows wider and w idei until the poor blundering father whr bus brought all the troubles about won-der-s what has happened and why on earth -'they can't nil get on" while hr is eoinfortablv away for the day! It i-, the stepmother who should make the "renter efforts at peacemaking, for noi only should we all he infinitely patient with turbulent and impulsive youth. 'nit she "-hou'd remember it is she whe has come into the new family, and .l.nulil therefore come laden with love and liatienciv remembering wisely that tl.e \ery viole.ico of t!ie prejudices of youth often procures rheir easy disap-p»-aranee. Young people acutely unjust >':• d outra'ieouslv unreasonable are eqn,i!l\- open to the iill-cDnqunring power i.f ]tm\ against which youth alone hap ili- 'lntely no defences. So mnc'h for the trials of stepmothers, nnd now for their jirosrcution. Ther» nre women, few and far between I believe, who deliberately turn the children away from their father's home 1 am not criticising weak and foolial fathers; but merely stating an incontrovertible fact. I know myself of « case of two women whose father mariied when they were both well over thirty, and not only sent them out of «» luxurious household where they had jointly reigned for years on an allownr.ee so small that it was impossible tc live on it. but when he died, left hi* entire forturie., including the countryplace nnd all the beautiful art tre-a-»urc<; it contained, to the second wife md her only daughter. These two girl* who are now middle-nged women are both enrnintr ft poor and precarious livins;, while their step-sister lives in th« greatest luxury. 1 know of another case where the woman frankly refused to marry thf man until his entire family had loft the large house in London where they all lived together — and I know of other cases also. I .think on the whole, un-lc-.s she is nm trying for money and nothing else, the young woman tvh« marries ;» widower with a family moke* ii very poor bargain. Only an idealist exacts to be the first womnn "ho" ha? rver loved : Imt everyone is wiser if "she" prefers to be the first "he" ha* married. — Mrs Neish. in M.A.P.

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