"FROM SELECTION TO CITY."

Taranaki Herald, Volume LV, Issue 13921, 27 March 1909, Page 6

"FROM SELECTION TO CITY."

By STEELE RUDD.

XIII. MY FIRST DAY IN A GOVERNMENT OFFICE. (Continued.) After timorously interrogating a j policeman, and exhibiting the letter I carried to numerous people, who led mo further and fuither astray, 1 came on | the house I was seeking accidentally, after hunting for it about three hours. ; It was the home of a ship's captain. "Oh. yo&," a woman to whom I delivered ihe message said, "they were landed yesterday. Do you think you can carry them?" . Al , , «. I had formed the opinion that whatever I was to procure for the chief I would be able to put it in my pocket. But when I was confronted with a bundle of formidable war weapons, the pride of some South Sea Islanders, a cargo of spears of all lengths, one a? long as a tram section, and pointed and jagged with fish bones and sharks teeth— l fell back several paces, and ran my palm across my perspiring brow. "I don't think they're very heavy, though," the woman said, seeing my distress; "but you'll have to be verj careful with them, for they're most valuable curios." I made no response. I stood mentally endeavouring to conciliate my exalted dreams of an office with the lumbering of these infernal things through the streets. A small rebellion began to rise within me. I only wanted a leader, or a little encouragement to make trouble — to make tracks, anyway. But that woman was not the person to inflame i me to violence. She didn't seem to be aware of my social status. She took a Idt for granted. She also took up the gruesome consignment of pointed stickr and eha(rky teeth, and balanced their on my shoulder without asking leave j I thought I saw dry blood on one, and i shuddered. "Mind them going out the gate, she squeaked as a final injunction^ "and give "my regards to Mr. — '■ — " And off I strode with nothing but evil And animus in my heart for the chief of my department. 1 felt he had deceived and humiliated me. A large dog bounded for me as T started, and wok© my instincts of selfpreservation. I immediately descended to the level of the savage. I unloaded slightly, and thrust the spear points at him. The woman screeched assurancer that "Carlo wouldn't bite." But I had n*y own opinion. I distrusted dogs, and Carlo, I could see, was all over r dog. I made another cUg at him witlthe "shark's teeth, and the woman, ir a- high key, cried: "You impudent fellow; I'll report you to your master!" * Then I made for the gate, with one eye keeping a lookout in the rear, and the other pn the spear tips, which were pointing the way out, some yards ir jidvance of me., I htfrried along a footpath. The first turn to, the Jeft I remembered war mine. I reached the corner, or rather, th© fishbone and sharks' teeth reached it, And was negotiating it successfully, when ah unwieldly man with a large Corporation, coming m the oppositedirection, it too. He threw up his hands and howled, just as ho was about to be speared in the stom ach. I sared bis life,, and quickened my pace." "Young man!" he gasped after me. I looked . round, but didn't stop. And When I turned my head again the sharks' teeth were flirting with the back hair of a v \dung lady wheeling fi pram a little in front of me. I direct cd' them past her ear, and when the;* crossed her vision she gave an appalling scream, and. Desert-ed her pram. Thr wild stare in hor eyes when she' faced me made me feel, like an a^aSsin. Bu[ I said nothing. I kept going. Am* how I began to sweat! And I wished myself back on the open plains, away from the gaze of the strange and gaping crowd! I thought to minimise the chances' of murder, and halted and reveifeed' arms. It was several miles' to the office, and I made up ray mind to' walk, and avoid trouble on the 'bus. Past tlm person and that I steered my burden, every now and again evading a charge of manslaughter by a hair's breadth Once, with a cWI of skill, I steered clear of a wobbling, inattentive Chinaman, carrying a pair <^f baskets, andheard a woman squeal just behind me. I eased up, and looked round to ser dhat was going on. and as my shoulders turned I caught sight of the wo man frantically clutching for a' red parasol that was gliding away from lier in the sharks' teeth. Thoughts' o? handcuffs and lockups rushed through me; but I* kept my presence, of mind I used my body like a crane, and swung the p-srasol .back, and lowered it j into the I'arms1 'arms of "the woman — into the arms of a dozen women, in fact, and as many men, for a crowd quickly collected. Then the woman screamed things, and dodged under the barb"d curiofi. and brandished her damaged property in my face, I silently damned the chief of my department" for the interest he took in barbarians, and escaped. After -that I deemed it safer to keep the, sharks', teeth in front of me, .and charged ends again. I was getting on well. • I was becoming skilled in the art of sharing the hair off people's car* with a spear without hurjbing them. Old fools of men who came along, halfscrewed, arguing things, and; waving their hands about, and looking inte each other's faces, gave me most trouble. It required all I had learned about handlino; the weapons to save their lives. Whenever I ported helm, they ported, helm Then I would have to stand still and yell a danger siansl to them. - And how they would wake up when they found themselves within an inch or two of being impaled as trophies on the handiwork of Tommy Tanna! I Jidn't lau<j;h at them, an omission I have always regrotted. It was one of -Jie "perfect moments" I failed to seize.

The newsboys, though,' worric^ mo n lot : and impeded my way more than all th*> others put toother. And fhoy uoro pretty thick at that hour. Tliov followed me. ran along besido mo. shouting at the top of theri voices : — "Th' new Cuv'nor! He's lost 'oself outer th' neroession." , And one snatched a rival's newspaper and imnaled it on the .spear points. The additional weight wasn't perceptible, so T made no demur. T bore that evening vp" aloft ns a savage would a. scalp, and the news ratals; were delighted. The*rheered, and jeered in triumph, ai>r! nsed me as ono hired to advertise their waros. An elderly man, with symoatlnin iiis eve, overtook me and release l that newsnaper and hurled it on to tho street. The -lewsboys scowled at him. mid in injured tones growled in chorus. ["DickenM"

I saw the groat stone building whoro tho office was located, and lejt inton.se relief. A short distance further and ] mounted the steps and guided those spear heads into the main corridor. It Avas a long one v ith numerous doors on each side. Some of tho occupants were on their way out— it was elosing-timo now — saw mo advancing and flattened themselves against tho wall till I hud passed. Others poked their heads out of the doors and withdrew them again hurriedly. I thanked honvon^ J had only a few more paces to go. The door of tho chief's room -opened as 1 approached it, and the deputy, in all the glory of a volunteer's uniform, rushed out in a blind hurry. I saw him before he saw me. I only had timo to say "Hoh!" when he bunted the iish bone and sharks' te eth with his military shoulder and knocked mo back.

"Oh, my hoaven!" ho exclaimed, "nn heaven!" holding his shoulder and doing the wriggling act in the corridor. I felt sure I had fatally wounded somebody at last. And while I was engaged in this pleasant feeling a bellow came from the deputy that brought all the building along, including the charwoman.

"Phwhat ar-r-o them?" ,he howled, eyeing Tanna's implements' of war as though they were snakes. Then he j lifted his vbiro an octave higher, and announced to the world that he was> "pizend — pizend ! bigod !" "Dear me! dear me!" the chief said, appearing on tho scene, "what's the matter?" And he looked first at me. then at the wounded deputy, and then at his own lovely curios which I still held balanced on' my shoulder. "Th-th-that d foohl " the de-j puty began. j But I didn't hear any more. I jumped from under the spears and rushed into the office and put my head onj the table. 1 After a while the clerk came in, and said : — "How did ;,ou manage to do that?" I made no reply. Visions of the deputy's funeral came to me. I was lost. "Pity you didn't put one right through him." came from the. clerk. Then I hoard him open the door and go home.

A little later the charwoman entered with her broom and pans, and started throwing the furniture about. "Was it you as stunk thet thing into Mr. •'".she asked with a chuckle. "But it wasn't my fault," I murmured.

"I wished yor had or'- ," she broke off, and addod: "Ah, wfll, I won't say what I was <?r goin' to." Th^n I wont off to tho ' boardiiuz;hoiiKo. And that was my firsj; day in an offico.

(To be continued).