Those Terrible Twins.
By W. W. GARTNER,
Author of "Matrimonial Mishaps," &c. NUMBER TWENTY-SIX. If you boya think you oan behave yourselves, and attend to your own business you may come in; and if you do not dc it, you will stay out for good. Now ] trout you to listen to what I am saying as I mean business," said the storekeeper, addressing the twins, who were banging around tho door. " Thank you, Mr Clutch; we will try to be good, and remember what yoc say. Ws always did try to behave ourselves wheiever we were, and " *• All I have to sny is, you miss it i>jr a long way," said the storekeeper. " Here is some tea ma sent back," «aid Bije; " she says she ' is no calf to * drink hay-te?; and if this is the best Clutch has got, you hnd better go over to Grandon's, and borrow a couple of pounds till he can order some.' " " What kind of tea did you order?" Asked the storekeeper. " Best uncolored Jap," replied Bije. " Then you got it. Let me see it," said tbe storekeeper. " If that is your best, we wou'd like to trade it for Limburger cheese, so ma can get the tabte out of her mouth. She says she Las tnsted it £.r three days, nnd she only took one mouthful. The hired girl says it is flavored with codfish; but dad says it tastes more like old bootß than anything he can think ©f.'» *' It is nil nonsense! I know what tea I am buying. It is just an infernal notion. You want to find fault with something," snapped the storekeeper. " Ihe trouble with you, Clutch, is that you thiDk you know what your customers want better than they do. If you could get that idea out of your head, you might 'run a country store BUcceeafully," said Ben, as he broke a big piece from, a cake of nwj'Je sngar thai lay in a box which the oleik had jugfc opened. *' I am able to look after my own business without any advice from you," said the storekeeper, as he picked up the box of sugar and carried it behind the counter. " That is a mighty poor article of maple sugar. I should say it wns about four-fifths brotm sngar," declared Ben, as he gave a piece to Bije. " It is all of that; besides, it was scorched in- making," asaerted Bije, after tasting it. " If you boyß have no other business here than to find fault with my goods, you will get out of here mighty sudden,'' said Clutch, as he walked around to where the boys were standing. " Clutch, do you believe in dreams? Did you ever know one to come true?" asked Ben. " I never gave *hem any serious I attention, and therefore I am not j authority on them," curtly responded the storekeeper. " They are very queer things. Yon ■just seem to jump to some distant place, but it seems all right, and you do not get surprised at anything. It comes tight along, iust like winding yarn. I once had an awfully strange dream, and it was just as real as though I waa awake. All at once I was standing right here and you were out there in tho back room. You were sifting sand into a barrel of brown sugar. Then you took a lot of gravel aud mixed it among the dried fruit and coffee. Now what do you suppose made me dream that? Of course, it was nothing but a dream." \ " How do you suppose I know What causes your fool dreams?" snapped the storekeeper. "Well, I did not know but you might. • They say a peison never dreams of anything he Jocb not see or think of through the day. Ihe only way I could account for it was that the hired girl «aid the coffee-mill became choked while fihe was grinding the coffee that morning, and sho found a stone as large as a small maible in the coffee, and " " See here, you young 1 reprobate! Do you mean to soy I put stones in i»y * coffee? I will break every bone in your insignificant bodj!" roared the storekeeper .as he rustle a dive for Ben, (
" Hold on, Clutch. I never said you put them in; I only dreamed you did. I guess a fellow has a right to dream in a free country like this," said Ben, as he dodged around the stove to avoid the storekeeper. " You strongly intimated trickery on j my part. You netd to be very cautious what yon say around here, after this, or you will get yourself kicked out of this stoic!" was Clutch's wrathful reply. " Wiiat was that I heard aV>out your father fulling into the cistern?" asked the blacksmith, who had entered during the above conversation. " That was one of dad's little jokes. He never undertakes to do anything smart without getting his foot in it. Our cistern is close to the back door, and when yon come around from the front door, you walk over tho platform to Ret to the door. Well, the pump got out of order, and we sent for a man to come and take it out. It wns jnst nt nightfall when the man arrived, so he said he would not bn'ng it back till morning. " For three mornings in succession a tramp had been at our house, asking for something to eat. Dad said he did not want any regular boarders, so we would fix up a littlo surprse for him. He got a thin strip of scantling and laid it across the cistern. It was just strong enough to hold up the platform, when dad laid on the boards they rested on the scantling. Then we told ma and the hired girl about it, and dad chuckled to himself every time we spoke of the tromp-trap.
"The next morning dad got up early, because be wns going fishing, and hurried with his breakfast. He put on his hip boots, and set his basket out at the back door, when Squire Johnson came along, dad rushed out tho front door and forgot his basket. Be gave Squire Johnson hiu rod, and ran to the back door for his basket. He hai forgotten all about the trap, and ran on to the platform, and in an instant plunged into the cistern. " "We heard him yelling, and thought we had the tramp. Bije said we need not be in any hurry, as a good soaking would do the tramp good. When we got there, the 6quire and the tramp were i pulling dad out of the cistern. Bije and I could not help snickering a little while we were fishing out dad's hat. " ' If you do not shut up that idiotic giggling, I will give you something to giggle at!' " My, bat he was mad! He took the tramp in, and gave him a square me"al, and filled his pockets with lunch. When the tramp came out, he looked at the cistern, grinned at us, and said goodby. He has not been back since. , ''Well, ma and the hired girl laughed at dad till he was mad clean through, and when he got out where we were he told Bije and me to go at once to Miss Jacobs, and not to show ourselves inside that house again till we had fixed up that Styles matter. 'We had no choice but to go, but we did not hurry, and I thought of what I would say. When we rapped at Mibs Jacobs' door it was opened by Styles' girl herself. I " ' Good-morning, boys; I am glad to see you again,' blio said. I thanked her, and proceeded with my explanation. " ' Miss Jacobs,' I said ' since we wero here we have learned that Styles' presence at the cake walk was purely accidental. The truth of the matter seems to be that dad was engaged to marry the couple; but, through some misunderstanding, lie arrived too late. He invited Styles to go with him, and ( to please the colored people, they joined in the cake walk.' ' "* Wby did you not tell me that 1 your father was there?' she asked. " 'We were so ashamed of it that we never iuformed a soul about it. He never told ns he was going to marry them. This is tho reason we kept still,' I replied, and she looked at us rathef queerly, and I had hard work to keep my face straight. " ' That puts a different face on the matter, and I owe Mr Styles an apology/ she slowly said. " ' Ha will jump clean out of his boots with delight if you give him a chance to even walk along the road in from of youiliouae,' said iJije.
" ' You are sure this is the truth? I hear that you boys are apt to be mischievous.' she said. " ' Sure as death that is the straight truth, and as tor us, we are as innocent of half they blame us for as a new-born babe. May we tell Styles to come down, and fix tha thing up?' I asked. " • Well, yes, you may tell him I have found out the particulars of it, and do not consider ho is altogether to blame,' she replied. " Thon we dug out for Styles' place. He looked very ugly when we went in, and we etayed pretty near the door. " ' Well, Styles, we have been down to s c Miss Jacobs, and fixed np that negro wedding. She says she owes you a kis3 and forgiveness, and wanti you to call around after supper to complete the reconciliation. But you are not to come till after supper, aa she wants it to be in the dark, and after a full meal,' said Bije. " ' Look here! If you devils lie to me, I will kill you both,' he said, jumping up. j "We convinced him it was all right, and went home. " Well, we will try this tea, and if, it is not good, back it cornea. You cannot run any of your Little John stuff up to our houso," said Bije, as they backed out of the door, (to be continued.)
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Bibliographic details
Taranaki Herald, Volume XLVI, Issue 11021, 11 September 1897, Page 2 (Supplement)
Word Count
1,710Those Terrible Twins. Taranaki Herald, Volume XLVI, Issue 11021, 11 September 1897, Page 2 (Supplement)
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