THE PREMIER'S SONG.

Taranaki Herald, Volume XXXV, Issue 7171, 15 September 1886, Page 2

THE PREMIER'S SONG.

[frosi tub "otago witness." (Am : " When I was a lad." — Pinafore.) When I was a lad I was no fool, But saved up my pennies when I went to school ; I could spell long words and parse every

noun, And besides being clover, I could play " knuckle-down." I played the little game bo skilf ullee, That now I nm Premier of the Colonee. I learned my catechism o/£ by heart ; Parson chucked my little chin and thought me very smart ; But when he quoted Scripture, I opened the book And posed him with Colenso on the Pentateuch. I posed the parson so effectualtee, That now I nm Premier of this Colonee. As I got older I grew at such a rate, That very soon I found that 1 must cmi-

grate, I took a cabin passage for the Southern Hemisphere, And on board I taught the captain of the ship how to steer. And he steered it very well, else how, do you see, Could I ever have been Premier of this Colonee ? When I landed ia New Zealand I was such

a fool That as dominie I taught in n. public school ; Tho Board for piomotiou I used to importune, But this they wouldn't_givc me, as I Bang out oi tune. , , [ _• ' I sang out of tune so confoundedlee, That now I am Premier of this Coloneo.

Of crude superstition I divested myself ; The Bible and theology I laid on the shelf; I swore no priest on my shoulder should

lid c, I built a Lyceum, an 1 publisheJ a Guide. I compiled lliis Guide so luarm-dKc, That In: Education Minister ot this Colonuo. When once an M.11.R., into office aoon I

got. Tho Premiership was mine, yet "precedence " was not. ' No stickler, I, for " precedence " ! 1 thought it ri^ht und jusl To play tho second fildlo if I couldn't ploy the fust. And IVo played second ftidlo so skilfullec That tho Queen, as you know, made me 1v.0.M.G. The full Hood of fortune I thought I should reach In the halls of Frcelhought, when I mudo my "capping " speech, Tho noisy 1 undergrads, I resolved to over-

awo By the dignity of knighthood and the mi jesty of hw. For it's very, very wrong, you all will i ngroe, To interrupt the Premier of this

Colonee. With a " Boby " in tho chair and a posse in the, hall, One would think I might have quashed them — 01), dear, no — not at ail ! Tho Premier and Attorney and Sir Robert

Stout to boot Could not quash the Gnudeamus— that exasperating hoot. Oh, who would be a Premier and a K.G'.M.G.

To bo sat on by bojs of a univereitee! Now, boyp, I confess how silly 'twas of tno To show in)' beastly temper and to scold so lustilee. Rest assured jour own Sir Robert won't be

found offeiiding twice ; And to show 1 bear no Malice. I'll just give <,ou this advice : Good humor.' is v j;\vel — whatever you iimy be — Whether student or professor, or a X U.M.G,