ADVENTURES OF THE CHUMS

Taranaki Daily News, 6 August 1932, Page 7 (Supplement)

ADVENTURES OF THE CHUMS

“Bay,. Bichaxi,” said. Gwen, the -other evening, “What is an Assegai?” “An assegai,” replied Richard, “well, well, I suppose it’s an assegai.” “Don’t he silly/’ retorted Gwen. “Do you know what it is?’ “No, I don’t,” said Richard, “but if you give we the dictionary I’ll soon tell you.” y f * .

L “Nbw,”sai4 Richard, with the dictionary oh Ms jaeiTW sooh tell you what an assegai is.' Row do you spell it?” “How should I; Gwen.snapped. “It musf he among the,'.asses/” Polly suggested. “Of course,” cried-Gwen* '"l’ve got it, -‘assegai.’ It means a gay ass, or a jolly donkey.” “In that case you’re an assegai very often,” said Polly, which did not please poor Gwen, ' •■■ ■

Bichard had awful difficulty in finding .assagai, ”«B he <8 uncertain of the spelling. Gwen insisted that he should find it, bspause she said she was not going to he called an assegai -without knowing what it ipeant. At last Richard found it. “Hei» fit •js,” he-cried.” “Why, it’sa kind of spear used by the Zulus. I thought it was something like that,” “Well, you are certainly not an assegai, Gwen,” said Polly. “You’re not sharp enough!”

Next morning Richard came along with two Jong sticks. “What are they?” Gwen asked. \ “Assegai,” said Richard. i “What, are you going to do with them?” Gwen' enquired. “What ,am I going to do with .them!” cried Richard. “Why, show you how to use them, of hours®! I’ve been practising with them this morning?’

llun: afraid”Rich.ar.d had not quite the right idea of the size and use of an assegai, for he had made qfttite Mayy Jong poles. But it did not matter. He had madb’ a i .spejn:.hb .cpuld tfifow. He .explained to Gwen how to do it, and Gwen wanted to have first-go, but Richard insisted upon her .watching him. “Watch w,'andkee what I first,” he said.

Gwen.never got her go, for Richard threw his spear so well that it went through a window, .and, of course, the poor dog got into serious trouble/ Since then he has been inclined to blame Gwen, because he says if she hadn’t worried him. about the word assegai it wouldn’t have happened. Polly said,it would have been much better if the word had meant ’‘jolly donkey” after all, because only a jolly donkey would throw a stick through a window!

AMBIGUOUS. • “Charles,” said the hostess across the table to her husband. “Yes, my dear,” he responded. ‘ “How .inattentive you. are,” she admonished’. “You -must look after Mr. Jenkins -’better. He’s helping himself to everything!” ■ • • • • ' - LIARS.A preacher gave. out. that he would give a .discourse, on the .subject of “.Liars” f'h© next meeting day, and in preparation to receive it ‘adequately he .would ask all the men present to read the 17t}i : chapter of St.'Mark. On the next day he remarked that he wa.s going to speak .about ’ liars, and would ask all who had been there before and; who had'read the chapter to hold up; their hands. Nearly all did eo. '' iHe then remarked that as there were only 16; chapters there they were -in * splendid -condition to hear his sermon. ... »• • • • . SPEED UP. If you ..cannot .win, .make the one ahead break-., the record.

MERCY! A man took his wife with him to Paris, As neither had been to the French capital before, they promised themselves a good time. They began by treating themselves to an excellent dinner. Towards the end of the meal the man was telling his wife that her French pronunciation was all wrong, and that she should not say “merci” as if it was our English word “mercy.” “Now I’ll give that waiter 10 francs,” he fold her,’“and you listen carefully.” ' He handed the man a 10-franc note, and the reply was, “Thanks very much, sir.” •'♦ • • THE FRIENDLY CLOCK. The big grandfather clock that stood in the hajl of little Betty’s homo was a never-ending source of wonderment to her, and used to spend a long time gazing at it. One day her aunt entered the hall and saw the child gazing at the clock-face. “Is the clock going, Betty dear?” she 4t.sfc.ed, The child shook her head. “No, auntie,” she replied; “it’s just Standing still and wagging its tail.”