THE MOCK COURT.

Colonist, Volume LVII, Issue 13794, 15 June 1915, Page 2

THE MOCK COURT.

SOME AMUSING INCIDENTS.

The Court run by' the Commercial 'Travellers' Committee at the Wellington Carnival was perhaps the most amusing side-show on the ground, says tho Wellington "Times." The energetic amateur ■iinbs of the law never desisted in their search for local celebrities, and when these failed all and sundry were haled into the largo, tent. The Crown Prosecutor was fined 23s for impersonating his own personality. Mr. Montgomery was charged with "being a public servant and endeavouring to please everyone—an impossible tav-k," and a cliemist with selling pills and patent medicines,"thus doing doctors out of an honest living. But sometimes the "police" were too energetic. For example, a sailor off one of His Majesty's ships was brought in, and the patriotic "judgo" discharged him without a stain on his character and fined the arresting constable half-a-crown. One prisoner pleaded that he was deaf and dumb, and was fined £5. His astonishment and subsequent remarks showed that, his hearing was good, and the fine was reduced to 10s. Mr. P. J. O'Regan's trouble was that he had allegedly threatened to cease his attention to the newspapers and become a squatter, aud Mr. J. Tripe had a charge against him of being a lawyer instead <?f a clergyman. Failing to sit on an Austrian chair was alleged against many ladies. Two charges . in the "book" against local stipendiary magistrates were "speaking too gently when calling for order in the court," and "lack of dignity when on the bench." A policeman was found guilty of being a member cf tho force and refusing a drink at half-past ten on Sunday night. The usual privilege of the press did not avail its' representatives within the precincts of this -court. Several of them were fined during the afternoon for "impersonation," -the "use of language," for "scribbling," and finally for being journalists at all. A'prominent motorist was fined severely for exceeding the speed limit and for having a veiled lady iv his car, and a common offence was sending in a correct income-tax return. The Government Meteorologist was fined 5s for interfering with the weather, os for giving a wrong name, 5s for its not

being sunn-., 5s for the previous clay's rain, and 5s for impertinence to the judge. An offender who was alleged to have entered the park with £12 and been found three hours after with £11 19s 6d in his pocket was relieved of his spare cash. V vith -frequent adjournments for refreshments, the "court" was busy all the evening, and at its conclusion the "judge" himself was fined for not attending tc his business and attempting to run a mock court.