Mews Items.

Colonist, Volume XXXVI, Issue 7735, 15 September 1893, Page 4

Mews Items.

(FBOM OUB LATEST E-OHANGES.) A ladies' paper tells a pretty story about the Dnchess of York, «• Mrs Hervey, the wife of the rector of Sandringham, is one of the intimate friends of the Prince of Wales's family, It was in her hoase the poor Dnke if Clarence rested on the memorable day he was taken ill. Mrs Hervey, who has been in very frail health for some time, was unable io be present at the wedding in London, bnt as the Duke and Dnchess of Tork drove past the pretty Saudringham rectory, they had their carriage stopped, and made personal inquiries after the sick lady indoors, while the Duchess handed one of her own beautiful bouquets to be given to the invalid.', Thk Rev. W. Morley, says that the first child born in Chicago is still living, and is yet only a hale matron of 61 summers. She has witnessed the city develope from a few log cabins along tbe shore of Lake Michigan into its present marvellous proportions, and containing a population running into millions. On dit that a Mr Bauoke of Kumara has determined, ii he can get no one else to contest the Westland seat with Mr Seddon, that he will undertake the task himself. Mr Bancke is understood to hold very strong views on the way the Premier has dealt with the question of reducing the oharge for water. He knew better I Once upon a time, a Frenchman and a Dutchman were travelling in Pennsylvania, when their horse, lost a shoe. They drove up to a blacksmith's shop, and, no one being in, they proceded to the houae to inquire. The _ ranchman rapped, and; called out. " Is the amitty wittin?" «< Shtand back," said the Dutchman, •let me spheak: Ishder blacksmith's shop in der house ? " "The « Honiara Times ' of September Bth : states :— News from Diamonds bears witness to the great hindrance thte awful weather is to prospecting. Portugee Joe and party have been flooded ont of five tunnels, so heavy is the water overheard. They arecommencing another. Forty men are on payable gold, and the field will undoubtedly expend with the advent of fine weather. This story is to'a of Jtfr W.B. Gilbert! He jput up his horse, oneway at a email country inn, on tne signboard of wlioh was painted conspicuously ihe notice, 'Entertainment for man and beast.' When bis tanoh was brought he looked dissatisfied, and surprised the waiter by saying, 'This is all very well so far, bnt where is the entertainment for the man ?' NOTHING LIKE SOAP. Fore Map, good soap, boneal soap, Pima

A Scotch woman was returning by J train from a market town where aheL had made a few purohases. Just ac I the last bell rang a fussy gentleman, i elegantly dressed, and with a man- ; mind thyself-looking face, rushed into tbe compartment, flung himself hastily into a corner, pulled out an evening paper and proceeded to devour its oontents. Hardly had he become seated when the woman timidly addressed him, but he would not listen to her, and threatened to report her, Kirsty's eyes flashed, then twinkled, she said no more, and the cholerio gentleman retired, with an angry frown, behind his paper. All went merry as a dinner bell until the train arrived at Oromlade, when Kirsty, stepping out, again addressed the churlish individual in the oorner, • I oarena, sir, whether ye report me or no, but I want that pun* o* butter you bave been sittin' on for the last sax mile.' May Oolvin is familiar to the people of Kansas aad Missouri. Not because of her incorrigible criminal record ie she so prominent, but because of her passionate love for horses, which seem to have oomplete control of all faculties and energies, and prompts her to the moat daring deeds ol horse-stealing ever perpetrated. She was incarcerated the other day for the ninth offence of stealing horses, all committed in the last two years, though she is now but 19 years old. Her dinner was handed into her at twelve O'clock, and without stopping to eat it she immediately began to work with the iron fork to effect her escape. Her cell adjoined ibe gaol, and with the shrewdness of a professional gaol breaker, for which she also has some reputation, she sncoeeded in sawing an iron bar and digging a hole about 30 feet above ihe ground. She then tore her bedclothes into rope, and formed a flexible ladder, on whioh Bhe descended to the ground, aud was gone, no one knew which way, before the sheriff missed her, two hours later. The inquest on the body of Sergeant James Robinson, 3rd East Surrey Militia, who was Bhot at Bilsea Rifle Bange by Private George Mason, of the same corps, was conoluded at 1 Portsmouth. Evidence was given that Robinson had borne testimony against Mason, through whioh the latter was oraared three days' confinement to barrac_3 for neglecting duty by refusing to clewi mess tins. On the range Mason said to a comrade. " Here's a t good mark," t«id shot the sergeant , dead. When arretted Mason said, " I shot him in the small of the baok aud meant to kill him." Tha jury returned a verdict of " Wilful murder." It was a terrib'e scene which was witnessed at Great Orosby, on the Lancashire coast, when the discovery ' was made that three young lada pupils , of Merchant Taylors' School, who had gone down to bathe, had found themselves in a position of great peril They had landed on a mndbank only a hundred and fifty yards from the water's edge, but the wind was blowing strong, and the tide was rolling in i with terrific force. A great orowd speedily gathered on the beach, but they were powerless to help. Meanwhile the cries of the poor boys for belp could be heard, while the wind was increasing in power, and the water was steadily rising around them. At last; tbe men of the neighboring coastguard station were able to get out a punt, but it was found impossible to make way in such a craft against wind atd tide. They contrived, however, to reach a boat which was lying at moorings, and a shout of joy went forth from the spectators when it was perceived that she was beginning to make way with the ooastguard men aboard. Onward, onward, they pulled, Btraiui-g every nerve, but, unhappily, when the rescuers were only Borne sixty or eighty yards from the bank, a wave swept the poor lads off their feet and carried them away before their eyes. An unsuccessful attempt was made to seize them as they drifted past. Two men then plunged into the sea, ' and succeeded in rescuing one boy, but the other two — Arthur Winslow, aged eleven, and Norman Krugerj aged 13 — disappeared. Their bodies have sinoe been washed ashore. The boy saved was a younger brother of Kruger. Wb Englishmen suffer from ball on the brain. It may be taken for granted that whatever an able bodied Englishman does not do with a ball cannot be worth the doing. The main feature of our raoe is this irrepressible impulse to do something either with, at, or to a ball. We kick it, we hit it, we thump it, we throw it, we drive it, we bump it, we roll it, slap it, and catch it ; we run for it, ride for it, and soiamble over it. Upon the earth, in the air above, and in the very waters even, there can be no possible rest for a ball so long as an average Englishman is within measurable distance of it. Give one of our fellow countrymen a bit of board and a ball, and he will at once possess the essential elements to ensure his happiness * » * * The cooking of France is surely better than cricket ; the art of Italy is better than football, and European polish better than polo. We have the worst food, the worst musio, the worst art, and the most work of any living race — and yet we are jubilant because we are able to do a multitude of things to a ball with bits of board !— (" The Linkman," in « Truth.*) An enterprising German Contemplates making an end of " five o'clock tea. " He claims to have produced a lozenge, made of compressed tea with a saccharine oentre, so that the traveller may be able to carry a number of cups of tea already sweetened in his waistcoat pocket. Tee London correspondent of the Auckland ' Star ' says that Miss Florence Mills, tha seoond daughter of the popular general manager of the Union Company, who came Home in the Coptic to enter the Academy of Music has already achieved some success, having won the bronze medal of the year against a large number of competitory. She is now eligible for tbe silver medal n i xfc year, and for tho gold medal (the highest distinction) in 1895. The Bishop of London is credited with the assertion that he cannot save nioney for hia wife and children; He /bias only £10,000 a year, but when be was Bishop of Eseter, with £4000 a year, he was a maoh richer man. London is, to translate a German phrase l

Oremtor: "Oan I collect that bill of mine ?" Debtor : " I'm afraid not, to-day." Creditor; "I hear you're going lo have a new house put up." Debtor: "Yes." Creditor: "Seems very queer, to me that a man who can't pay his honest debts can: be putting up houses." Debtor : " Did you hear who was going to put it up for ma ?" Creditor : " No." Debtor : " Auotioneer."

In thei "course of the finanoi&l debate, Mr Sandford spoke of the evil ol boy labor aa a very serious one for the Oolnoy. Half-trained mechanics and workmen were employed on every hand, scouring profit to employers, while they had to accept low wages for themselves. The Houae in the first cession of the New Parliament would bave to grapple boldly with thiß question, and insisi that boys and girls workiDg at trades should be properly apprenticed, The Auokland • Star ' says regarding the run on tbe Savings Bank:— An amusing incident of the panic was the behaviour of a very much alarmed old lady. Bhe got her cheque at the Saving's Bank and posted down to the Bank of New Zealand as fast as she could to cash it. Arrived at the cashier's counter at the Bank, she presented her cheque to the trembling clerk with most belligerent geßtulations and a frantic order to " Give me my money, ycu robber l" One greatly exoited individual rushed down to tbe ! Bank of New Zealand with his cheque j for £197. In his hurry aod anxiety I ie get his money, he dashed away with £100, leaving the other £97 in notes lying ou the counter, where it waQ found by a clerk. The old ladies who beseiged the Baok of New Zealand with their cheques, would not t ike notes ; thay wanted solid gold, and nothing less would satisfy their perturbed minds. Magsmen are slill haviDg a good time in Melbourne. A simple-minded shepherd, who after patient labor had eavtd about £115, accepted an engagement from a stranger who represented himself as a wealthy Qaeesland squatter. The latter took oharge of the shepherd b money. He has still gol it. The shepherd and detectives are searching for the supposed squatter. The American Derby of £12,000 was won by Boundless, who beat the time record for the race, by running the mile and a half in 2min 86|sec, There was an English competitor in the race called Strathrose, but he ran last, and was at once sent home again. Perhaps the most remarkable thing in connection with the race waß the starting. It took one hour and 40 minutes to effect a despatch. Snapper Gar 1 rison, the jockey, takes the whole of the credit for winning the Derby. In the opening of his interview, he complacently remarks: — "I made the owner of Boundless a rich man in 2min 36aeo. I put 50,000 dollars in his pocket, and all he gave me waa 1,000 dollars. It should have been 5,000 dollars at least." A Correspondent writes to the ' Otago Daily Times ' that a lady recently entered the store of a wellknown Chinese merohant not many miles from Dunedin, and in the pigeon English which is thought by some to be the correct mode under the oircumstances asked, " How mucbee you wantee this thing, John ?". Now the Celestial had an educated family growing up, and one of these happened to be present. With indignation flashing in hia eyes he retorted, "My father's name ia not John." Tho father with Oriental eerenityrespoudud, " Hold your peace ; ladies know no better, my child." The iieeffcon , Guardian ' gives the following^ from the pen of a twelve year-old school girl on boys — " Tbe boy is not an animal, yet he can be heard to a considerable distance. When a boy hollers he opens his big mouth like frogs, but girls bold their tongues till they are spoke to, and they answer respectable and tell just how it was, A boy thinks himself clever because he can wade where it is deep, but God made tbe dry land and rosted on the seventh day, When the boy grows up he is ca led a husband, and then he stops wading, and stays out nigh is, but the grew-up girl is a widow and keeps house,' Lately, the 34th Eegiment of Artillery, in garrison at Metz, was executing some firing exercises in the polygon at Haguenau, and, as usual, sentinels had been placed in various directions to stop circulation within the dangerous zone. An artilleryman placed his ear against the receiver ot the telephone when a flash of lightening suddenly struck the wire, and killed him. Mr Hogg stated to the House on Friday night (says the « Post ') that the Wairarapa fruit-growers oould not compete with imported fruit, owing to the high railway charges, and rather than spend money on experts to compete with blights, the Government should reduce freights. Mr Valet tine retorted that Central Otago people, though carting 50 miles and using the railway 70, could compete.