LACK OF MARRYING MEN TIMES HAVE CHANGED.

Te Aroha News, Volume III, Issue 133, 19 December 1885, Page 6

LACK OF MARRYING MEN TIMES HAVE CHANGED.

The problem of what we are to do with our girls (said the New York " CitW"') Is cine whose importance is increasing year by, year. It eeetias to be the disposition of young men' not ! to: marry j to abide with the meagre pleasures which they have rather then embrace those which await them. Statistics are always disagreeable things, and in this instance are ill-mannered enough to prove that one-half of the men between ! the ages of twenty and thirty are single, whereas formerly nine out of ten married before thejte were five-and-twenty. One reason for this can be discovered in the desire which young gentlemen' of spirit have to be in a position to support her before they take a wife. They are loth to assume the responsibility of a household while laying the foundation of a fortune or reputation. Times have changed since a young couple could begin life simply. We j are now living in a high civilisation of flats, and servants, and equipages; we forget how our fathers got married, and we wish to begin the in same style which we hope for our grandchildren. Old 'bachelors are no longer looked on as ridiculous beings, but as sensible men, too prudent, to enter matrimony until fairly settled in life, or until they can be certain of a provision fora wife and family." Club life has much to do with this hesitancy. It is commonly said that a bachelor spends enough on himself to support a wife in bis own sphere. But this is nonsense. What is comfort for one ia privation for two. Single men can have a great many luxuries in any of our better clubs, which their income would not afford if they were married, A wife would necessitate apartments or a house in a fashionable quarter,, dressmakers and milliners' ' bills; and other matters that a bachelor is ignorant of. Farther, he would be shut from a great many hospitable houses, and deniedinvitations to dinners and receptions that are not given to young married men. Another, though less potent, reason for the inf requency ot marriages is the scarcity of marriageable men* It is recognised by all of us that while society contains any number of girls well fitted for wifehood, there are very few young men suitable for husbandi. There are plenty of elaborately attired gallants among us, it is true. The streets, the theatre lobbies, and the parlours are full of haughty spirits that exhibit the tailor's handiwork excellently well, and are beautiful to a degree. Theße serve as makeshifts for escorts, are perfect as dancing partners, and make a brave show at receptions. But women want men. A bright, intelligent girl desires a husband whom she can respeot. And those little chaps have no talent, no brains, no future ; nothing to commend ttem farther than their father's position and their tailor's art. A thoughtful girl hesitates long before she intrusts herself to th 9 care of a man whose highest desire is to be considered fast, whose language is lisping, and whose head is not bo well educated as his heels. Our young ladies are not to blame for the scarcity of marriages. Jf we offer them alliance with men, they will get wedded soon enough. ' But the young fellows of ability, of ambition, have *no time to go into society, and the girls are given few chances to meet and to marry them. Men with a future are forced to work in the present.' And it by accident a bright young-man finds him«elf in a gay assemblage he is presently put out of countenance by a crowd of inane creatures who draw better than he, who have a greater stock of fine speeches, and who make much more bother over the exact pose they shall assume. 1 hey are the masters of a nice assortment of gossip ; they can hand a lady down to supper with infinite grace, and are very excellent things in the turning of music. The clever young fellow is abashed ; he is confounded by rivals whom he despises,and retires from the society of girls whom he admires but cannot bring elegance to. And when he does marry he probably takes to wife some pupil, some model, or some obscure relative of his landlord, who never was in sooiety at all.