"Oh, What a Fall was There!"

Te Aroha News, Volume 1, Issue 45, 12 April 1884, Page 5

" Oh, What a Fall was There !"

Apter a man has courted a girl with quotations from the standard- poets, addressed original "lines" to her eyebrows, and serenaded her with a banjo ; .existed principally 'on his knees "at her feet; vowed that, the world is divided into tflfo places—" where she is and where f ,she .is^not ;" .after he has sworn to challenge His rival and kill himself if she says "nbj" remarked" that he .' can never change, and promise to devote his life to providing her with all the luxuries of the four quarters of the globe, beginning with a sealskin dolman and diamond earrings, and so won her from Jones, who, though honestly in love and with the best intentions, never thought of saying or doing all that ; after she is " courted and married and all," and gone to housekeeping, it does seem a shame that he should take to snubbing her, and behave as though Bhe had,dragged him, an unwilling victim, to the altar ! And yet, how many romantic lovers, after being converted into husbands, astonish their wives by becoming grumpy; interpose a wall of newspaper between those whomthe church has joined together at every meal ; decline all escort duly on the ground of having " got their slippers on ;' ? speak of their angel's mother, whom she resembles exactly, as " that confounded mother-in-law of mine;" and no longer singing in the church choir with his head under his beloved one's bonnet, stays at home of % Sunday morning and questions heroutof a catechism of his own invention as follows : "Do you really think I'm made of money?" " Where's all the sugar gone ?" " How much coffee do we use, for mercy's sake ?" jfe" Why do you want a new bonnet when you had one last year?" " What do you want to go to your cousin's wedding for, when it's a wife's duty to be keeper at home ?" " Have your children four legs a piece like donkeys? I should think so, by the shoemaker's bill ?" " Why can't you do your own washing, as my sainted grandmother did ?" " What's the matter—what are you sulking for?" Certainly, this is a great " come down" for a glorified angel, who was always to live in an atmosphere of bliss, on music and perfume, and be worshipped by her humble adorer. No wonder that the poor, disappointed, wretched woman sometimesthinks, in the wildness of her despair, of putting the teaspoons into her reticule, taking the children, and going home to ma. m.k.d.