SAM AT THE SHOW

Sun (Auckland), Volume II, Issue 521, 26 November 1928, Page 9

SAM AT THE SHOW

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(By Our Special Commissioner , M inhinnick) XTOT counting all the animals an« tilings* there was a Radio An nouncer at the Show on Saturday. Sam says that he thought he coulc hear a band ouee or twice, too. Apart from the Radio Announcei Sam says that the judges were tin **big noises*’ of the Show. Sam says that, speaking strictly asa non-judger of sheep, the correct wa> to judge them would appear to be to first tickle them under the arms. If they don't laugh they are passed on to the next judge—who attempts to pull their hair out by the handful. It they can stand this without snivelling they pass the championship standard. Sam says that the faintest giggle o** the smallest snivel will disqualify a sheep every time. (By the way, the Radio Announcer was at the Show both days.)

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Bulls, on th§ other hand, are judged by their elasticity. Sam says that the skin of a really good bull should streteh at least 18 inches or two feet. It they stretch successfully, they aro then turned up and soundly slapped. Sam says that in this case, also, even the slightest whimper or grizzle will cause the bull to be rejected with contempt. Speakiug of Radio Announcers, Sam says that lie w ishes he’d seen the Bestmannered Saddle Horse Competition on Friday. He says that it must have been a beautiful sight to see all those horses raising their liats, their eyebrows and their partner's bids.

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Sam says that the winner of this competition would he the sort of horse that would win every' race as favourite and then want to apologise and shake hands with all the bookmakers and even the Radio Announcers afterwards. Sam says that no bookmaker could dream of harbouring a grudge against a horse that would do this. If there was one exhibition (barring the Radio Announcer) that was really worth paying a visit to, it was the Publicans' Booth. Sam says that the Prize Publican, with his glossy coat and his sleek i sides, was truly a glorious sight—in fact, Sam spent most of the day and his cash near him. Sam says that these heavy-draught animals (and, of course, all Radio Announcers) have invariably excited his warmest admiration. Sam admits, however, that he was rather disappointed that (he publicans were not driven round in the Grand Parade or tried out over the jumps.

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Apart from the Radio Announcing, the Steer-riding Competition was undoubtedly the hit of the show, but Sam says that a Publican-riding Rodeo would make steer-riding, by comparison, look like a wet day in Wellington. The other exhibit that touched Sam’s heart was the non-prize-winning cream puff.

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Sam says that as it squatted miserably in its pen and looked np appealingly at him, it nearly brought the tears to his eyes. P.S.—Sam says to be sure to tell you that there was a Radio Announcer —(or did I say that before?).