Shaun’s Patch

Southland Times, Issue 25308, 11 June 1935, Page 8

Shaun’s Patch

I. A little nooeoM now and ttica la ralUbod by fbo wtaMt men. —Hudlbrn.

Evidently the hope is that the new cabinet will hold gold. Many writers are troubled by typographical errors, but Mrs Ella Wheeler Wilcox, the bard of millions, suffered to the end of her life from one in particular. She had written: My soul is a lighthouse keeper, but the printer produced this cosmic line as, My soul is a light housekeeper and Mrs Wilcox never quite recovered from the. shock. * * » m A man may drink like a fish But a looker-on thinks The trouble is that he don’t drink What a fish drinks. * * * V Gazing out the window yesterday, I realized that Gandhi is wise to keep his methods for India. FOR AT.I DICTIONARY. Indirect Tax: Dog tax, the dog doesn’t pay it. » s » « In .he United States a business man used to be “in conference” when he didn’t want to be interrupted, later he was “assisting to draft a code” for his industry; now he is considering the President’s appeal. » ♦ * * EDUCATIONAL AIDS. Give a sentence containing “rumour”: “Book a rumour two.” *.♦ « « Do catcalls have nine lives? Sometimes at night. I think they do. *** ' » A woman’s paper says: Girls are not marrying as early as they used to do. Of course, night weddings have been growing in popularity. TO AND FRO. A correspondent suspected of being a teacher sings: The poorer the pay the poorer the teacher, The gifts that we offer oft value the preacher; The better the times are, the better the Times. The poorer the pressman, the poorer the news, In lieu of sound doctrine he stoops to abuse; A slap at the teacher is the least of his crimes. For wanting in matter, he jokes tries to hatch To fill up a space that is known as Shaun’s Patch, With some that are his, but with more that he mimes. “Me” having been written, I must to replying And little it is that he’ll find me denying, For when in the course of a rhyme or a quip I seem to have moved a fine triton to nip It isn’t because the construction is loose. “The better the teacher the better the pay” Is quite a sound doctrine I venture to say; But leaving it there is to act like a goose— For equally good as a sermon for preacher:. “The better the pay should make better the teacher” But why not declare it quite frankly, by Zeus? —ME.