Shaun's Patch

Southland Times, Issue 21650, 11 March 1932, Page 8

Shaun's Patch

A little nonsense now and then Is renshed -by tea

Fires were lit in Mukden as a protest against the enthronement of Henry Pu Vi the Regent of Manchuria. Not a warm welcome. * # Perhaps the Japanese plan was mucked in Mukden. # # epitaph for a not unworthy POLITICIAN. Though gifted in rough eloquence And fond of noses tweaking, He never missed the chance to stop Extensions of dull speaking. The average man might be called a mean man. » * * * EDUCATIONAL AIDS. Give a sentence containing the word “melancholic”: , «• , r “He eat the melon and suffered from melancholic.” * ♦ _ * Wasted Time: Period occupied by the other fellow’s speech. » * * * Mr Makitanara believes the politicians go to the House to “carve out the destiny of the country.” Well, so far the cuts seem to be their principal work.* * Most Scots like to have a free hand when they play cards. In 1931 the number of cigarettes smoked in the United States fell to a mere 115, 379,197,000. What a fag it must have been to count ’em. Mr Rowley wants someone to sit on the bench of the Arbitration Court to represent the public. Anyway that’ll make a nice four for Bridge. I believe the most popular author on American railways is Arthur Train. Of course Wells' is looked on as too deep and Theodore Drieser as prohibited. SOUTHLAND LIMERICKS. A furious tribesman of Mohmand Went out for a raid on the lohland; But the bombs from the air Sent him back to his lair When he found in a trice there was nohband. * * * * A conjuror has a better chance of balancing a budget than an economist. » * * » The Prime Minister says that the Economy Commission has not had any serious diversity of opinion. I suppose they had to observe an economy of words. THE GOLDEN AGE. The lucky girl you’ll find to-day Is she who can contrive For five or six full years to stay Upon the age of twenty-five. For age is just a state of mind, /And one can grasp the truth, That she has not yet left behind The careless energy of youth; But, granting that she isn’t dense, And something she has sought, She’s gathered some experience, By life a little she’s been taught. She’s neither juvenile nor old, She knows that she’s alive; But best of all —if truth be told— Is that she stays at twenty-five.