Shaun's Patch

Southland Times, Issue 21648, 9 March 1932, Page 6

Shaun's Patch

A lltU« now th’o In rellßbod by lh« —Hudibrat.

Salvatore Spitak, bootlegging gangster, announced in the American newspapers, that he would not have had his name dragged into such a delicate situation as assisting in the recovery of the Lindbergh baby if he “did not know the baby was not only the child of the Lindberghs, but a child of America.” Therefore, Zara-thustra, let us pull a paean from the piccolo Salvatore Spitals " Looked up slowly from his victuals And anyone could see that he was pained. That a gangster in full standing With the Lindberghs should be banding Was quite enough to leave his patience strained. “My name,” said Salvatore, “Has a record that is hoary, And in a thing like this should not be drawn; But no Spital could be lagging—I insist this is not bragging— When the nation is so obviously forlorn. “My business in bootlegging For the nonce can go abegging, And I’ll set aside my little Thompson gun, As a gangster and a father I declare that I would rather Help the nation to recover Lindy’s son. “But not because the parent Is a Lindbergh—that I daren’t Use as reason for this mission delicate; No—a sound financial gangster, Realize you must give thanks ter The depth of my affection for the State.” ***** The shortest distance between two points is a Schneider Cup aeroplane. « * * * Fish is a brain food. They can certainly stimulate the imagination of anglers. # ♦ * * Can it be said that grape fniit is pleasing to the eye? A man writing on humour said: “There is no joke like an old joke”; but a nasty London critic has retorted: “What about the new ones?” ♦ * * * EDUCATIONAL AIDS. Give a sentence containing the word “Sonata”: “He met his sonata school.” • * * * Little bankroll, small but true All the year I’ve clung to you Now there comes the fatal day When one of us must go away. I will stay and you’ll make tracks On ledgers headed “Income Tax.” * * * ♦ Women of Worcestershire in England have posted signs at rustic beauty spots with this inscription: Let no one say And say it to your shame, That all was beauty here Until you came. But that seems an unkind reception for the beauty seeker who happens to be plain. In these days it certainly is a wise stock that knows its own par.