THE ART OF TALKING WELL.

Southland Times, Issue 18059, 31 January 1903, Page 1 (Supplement)

THE ART OF TALKING WELL.

The wise woman is ;i good listener as weV: as a good conversationalist. tt i.s much more of an arttodraw out the best-thoughts :>f other people than it ia to converse well one's self. One often meets intelligent persons who never enter a roomful of people without monopolising the conversation. Their faculty for nselcsschatleris unlimited, and their conversation is liberally interspersed with the pronoun I. Well-bred people have a wholesome dislike of talking about themselves. One never knows how much the; know, or what wonderful sights they have seen, unless some circumstance occurs to bring it out. It is left for the person of few ideas and narrow visions to keep up a ceaseless chatter. It is tho occa. sional traveller who seeks to impress upon his or her friends the fact that he or she has seen something of the world. Such a one never misses a chance of speaking about it. While this is not an unpardonable fault, it is a disagresable one, which sometime? causes the inverate talker to be spoken of in terms anything but complimentary. It was recently remarked, concerning a popular and witty speaker, that "he ha* the gift of wit and sarcasm that amounts to a positive talent," and wo much question whether this gift is an enviable one. It certainly is not a desirable on 9, unless it is veiy shamefully usei, and undoubtedly •tfireasm lias its good uses. It shames people, where downright reproof or btamo would pass unheeded. It can touch lightly on light faults, scathingly on heavy oius. In iome cases it may be effective ; but probably not So often as we sometimes Satire flourished in the most depraved nge* of Eomo ; but it does not appear that the satirists effected much reformation by theii ■stinging shots. Public sarcasm mny hive occasionally modified vicious fashions, but in private life its only effect is usually to cause irritation and p.iin j it leaves a smart behind but without any soothing balm. It is generally easy to s;iy disagreeable things •hat are rather smart. The difficulty often is not to sny th.Mi ; but, as a rule, they are far better left unsaid.. However true thej may be, thy ur.kindne.--s that usuaMy lurkat the bottom of them epiito spoils their usefulness. 15 von if said without real intent to wound, thay may do infinite mischief.