SATURDAY GOSSIP.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2927, 12 August 1882, Page 3

SATURDAY GOSSIP.

If the stage is to be saved from decay it is comedy that will save it. The tragic is of limited interest, and to witness its portrayal does not give universal pleasure. But the gloomiest of us enjoy a representation of the follies, the shams, the peccadilocs, incidental to human life ; and of the complications, absurd situations, and troubles that are brought about by our weaknesses, frailties, and mistakes. I mast say in fairness, that we in Timarn, very seldom have such a glance behind the scenes of life, as Johnny Halls company now affords us. _ I begin to think the dramatic profession is favorable to a healthy happy life ;—the immortal Johnny is apparently as far off the end of his life, as he was at the beginning (pray pardon the obscurity into which enthusiasm conducts me.)

Looking back, not a very great number of years ago either, I think it will be observed that a very groat change in the personnel of the theatrical profession has been wrought. The actor used. to be a seedy Bohemian, hardly a desirable parti socially ; the actress was very much the same, and they lived separate lives, perforce, from the rest of the community. Now, most of the ladies and gentlemen of the stage are ordinary and very genial ladies and gentlemen ; of much improved morals and habits and education ; and their lives, if fairly successful, are about as happy and jovial as can be imagined.

A peculiar swindle in connection with the Salvation Army was recently disclosed at Home. An.“officer" of the “army” belonged to a Volunteer corps in the capacity of full private, and his “ leetle game ” was this. Having to go a-preaching in a distant town, he donned his Volunteer war-paint, and so passed on to his destination by rail, free of charge, as being on duty. Arrived, he doffed the garb of the temporal army, and assumed one suitable for spiritual warfare, and proceeded to “ expound the scripture.” I can quite conceive a Jesuitical process of reasoning, by which this soldier of two armies might justify his action. But the Bench’, being ignorant of casuistry and not gifted with his superior lights, came down on him with a fine.

Admiral Seymour took off his swallow-tail and flung it on the sofa of his state-room. “I can’t manage this business! But there is a man at the other side of the world, and W—ll—be is his name. That's the man to settle the Turkey hash.” And forthwith a cablegram summoned the ex-B.M. to the command of the iron-dads. Now , the secret of the Porte’s compliance with England’s demands leaks out! This may or may not be true but I tell it as “ ’twas told to me.”

The partition between reason and insanity is a thin one, and perhaps in some of us, it is often in danger of falling down. It is surprising how many people, generally sound, have a particular craze on which, when they start upon it, they go stark staring mad. Moral —Beware of nursing fancies or fads, and brooding over supposed wrongs.

The death of a ‘ leader of the people ’ is generally chronicled. One such has recently departed this life, of whom the world little—one Samuel Crookes. This man’s career shows what dangerous elements there are under the surface in society ; and it should act as a warning to those who, possessing the power of oratory, have the opportunity to move the masses. He who designedly, from selfish motives, sets a match to the explosive materials of which the masses are composed, regardless of the consequences, is a criminal of the very deepest dye. Even in this ninteenth century, the “ mighty people” are still dangerous to handle. Here is 'a specimen of the men who spring up in the midst of popular agitations— Samuel Crookes, a saw grinder, who was asaciated with the notorious William Broadhead in the Sheffield trade outrages which led to a Boyal commission on the subject, has just died at Sheffield. Crookes confessed to having bean hired by Broadhead to shoot Linley, with gunpowder ; and to many rattenings and other outrages. For these he received £2OO from Broadhead. It was largely owing to his revelations that trade anion terrorism was exposed and stopped.”

The Titan must surely be in the po* aition of the Irishman’s gun that wanted a “ new lock, stock, and barrel.” I dare say if she gets a new set of engines, a screw, and a hull, she will be just the boat for us. At any rate that is the impression some people have on the subject.

This is a puzzle for the publicans. Does the permission to keep your house open till 12 imply also an obligation to do so ? The “ beaks ” won’t give an opinion, and the lawyers can’t. I don’t think tho extension has made any Timaru publican’s fortune yet. The door is open and the gas is flaring, but upon my word, there does’nt seem to bo much business doing. Puck.