The Old Man in his Cot.

Pahiatua Star and Eketahuna Advertiser, Volume 6, Issue 563, 23 November 1891, Page 3

The Old Man in his Cot.

A La Moi>f., " Wip Has V inkle." Ye've been having a bit of a suooze, ould man. and ycr lucking better, too. I'm all right. Phil; only my head is too low. That’s better, ever so much ; now lift my foot over the edge of the bunk, and bring me in the Examiner— The Examiner ! Why, man alive, there's no such paper cirkelating here now. Ye heard the cry ot the Star l-oy, and Sambo has gone to fetch it. No Examiner—and Samko gone to fetch it; well, well, there's something strang* here. What does it all mean. Am 1 to understand that the Examiner no longer preys upon our rates, and has ceased to misrepresent Pahiatua ? Thatsjust what s the matter. Ever since George came into power ekiuiomy has been the mean feature av hia adminisiisation. The adver lisiiig erupt short, the Exanuuer man withdrew his patronage, do you see now ? I think I do; but tell me how long ago is it since I was run over. Hun in. you mean. No. I’m not aware that anything of the kina has occurred. Of coorse not; but it happened all the same. Ye see Cooper thought ye was tight, and he surprised the town by haying ye locked up. Well, more of this by and by. But tell me, l’lnl, how long is this ago. O—let me see—it aint six nicntlis yet; hut here comes the Star ; thanks, Sam, yer a gentleman, and no mistake; that’s it my boy, hang yer hat up on the floor. Now put the billy on, and I'll read the latest from the seat of war, as the saying is. llup la. blessed if he aint gone skithenng into the creek, billy and all. Flop he 1 goes; all. that'll take the starch out of his white westcoat, you bet. What on earth is the matter, Phil. Cant you be quiet and tell me how George got into power. \\ ell, ve see it would be rather a long yarn to tell, if I began at the tart, and gave you perticulars up till date; but I'll ckanonuse it. Ye see Kidd says yet to be kept quiet and in the dark. Why I dont know, but suppose it was for the same reason he sent us over a black man for a cook. Slip, slap, slush ; his bloomm feet are like bars of soap. There he goes again, head first into the meat safe. W hew! another pie dish up a tree. Hallelujah ! Ik> send that man away, Phil, or 1 11 get up and kick O, no you dont; but let me see. When George tlie First ascended the throne of Pietoo it was at a tune when civil discord racked the empire (under lUriiie's verandah) and threatened to fill the land with a deluge of bur-lud (WagstafTs XXX). George, fretting and furamg, emerged from his own native fastness (Mangoone) at the head of a hand of sturdy warriors, and by a series of forced marches through the country tlien known an the Mangahao, w I tore lie added largely to his army amongit tlie woodchoopur and pioneer patriots of the back country ; then travelling east across the Bridge of Baa's, he mode a detour through the Pukcmikaii mountain just in time to interript the usurping Duke of Pokukaack and his hand of foreign mercenaries ifrotu Woodvilie), who had been attracted by the odour of bran mash (their native element) in tlie vicinity of tlie Dudley Arms. The battle was idiort. sharp, and decisive, the Duke being wounded in the rear —of his army, while they were m.inuvnng < with a hogslied.) I will tell you about the battle another time. Phil.