INTERNATIONAL HUMOUR

Otago Witness, Issue 3773, 6 July 1926, Page 8

INTERNATIONAL HUMOUR

Judge: “You are sentenced to fourteen days bread and water. Hare you janything to say?” Bill: “Couldn’t you let me off the water?” —Sondagsnisse-Strix, Stockholm.

“I can’t understand why a girl likeyou takes an interest in politics instead Of selecting a husband.” r —Guerin Meschino, Milan.

Visitor: "Is this patient dangerous?” Asylum director: “Oh, no. It is a savant who spent 40 years in trying to square the circle, and then lost his reason through trying to find an apartment!” —Been Humor, Madrid.

constaoie. \\ hen he is full he suffers from megalomania. Now Jfl) thinks be is Atlas!” —Sondagsnisße-Strix, Stockholm.

Bank clerk: “As you work in the tfc eatre, you might give me some tickets fbr your show I” Actor: **Aa you work in a bank vou might give mo eome notes of your frank!” *-Jo«ro4 XmnMDt, Pm*

"Aa it is a charity hall you might have been a bit more generous towards your dress!” —Bay Bias, Paris.

“That’s a nice new hat. What did it cost 1” -—- “I don’t know. There was no price on it.” —Pelc Male, Paris.

Actress: “Why have you got this horrid soap ?” Maid: Because I read the advertisement in which you say that you cajlnot get on without it!” —i. Hire, Paris.

“For twelve nights I have had no sleep !>” “Grcat*heavens! What is your occupation ?” “Night watchman!” —Journal Amusant, Parrs.

"Your, husband has got over the crisis. How did you manage to make him sweat ?” “I showed him the biil for my new fur coat!” —Jsgend, Munich.

Parson: “Is the ship in danger?” Captain: “Not until the crew begin to pray!” Parson: “Thank heavens; they are cursing now!” —Kasper, Stockholm.

“Hi! Stop! You have lost your hat!” —Her Gotz, Vienna.

“How is it that Tommy’s face is so clean ?” “A snowball hit it!” —Der Brummer, Berlin.

THE FORCE OF HABIT. The motorist in the Sahara. —De Groene Amsterdammer.

“Alas, my boy, we are but dust!” "I wish you would tell that to mother. She beats me as if I were a carpet!” —Le Eire, Paris.

“You ask a lot for your land!” “Three francs per metrsl” “How much per litre?” -W* Mele, Paris.

“Your mushroom* look nice. But how do you tell the good ones from the bad?” “Quite easily! If you eat any of the bad ones you are as sick as a horse!” —Pele Mele, Paris.

Pastor (to village drunkard): “I was glad to see you at our temperance mee> ing last night!” Drunkard: “Oh, is that where I was?” —Goblin, Toronto

“Isaacson’s shop was burned down last night! ” “Strange! I thought he was doing well! ” —Karikaturen, Oslo.

He: “I cannot live without you!” She: “And I could not live with you!” —Pasquino, Turin.

Leader (hotly): "Cut that outl t heard you! I don’t want any non harmony) Thia ia a jazz band!” -Gobi?., Toroato.