FUN AND FANCY.

Otago Witness, Issue 3327, 19 December 1917, Page 54

FUN AND FANCY.

He: "I want to tell you a joke about mistletoe." She: "Be sure it isn't over my head."

Christmas shopping is a joy if taken in time, and you know what you want to buy and have the price. "Who were Santa Claus's ancestors?" " Oh, I dare say he comes from some Joet branch of 'the Christmas tree." Auntie: "Bo the children still believe in Santa Claus?" Mamma: "Well, if they don't they're diplomatic enough to pretend they do." —"I wish my wife was less firm in keeping her New Year resolution." " What was it?" "She resolved that I would quit smoking." —"I wish mietletoc were in season all the time," said he. "Why?" "It means kisses." "Orange blossoms are never'out of season " hinted the girl. —-"I think it's awfully silly to hang up a sprig of mistletoe during the Christmas holidays," we remarked. "Yes," replied the sweet young thing, "and so utterly unnecessary." Steen : " Do-.you think we're going to have %. white Christmas?" Mene: "It look 3 pretty dark for me. I can't, possibly raise the money to buy my wife 'the furs eho's set her heart on." '

Grnbbs: "Is Miss Sweetthing going to hang up any mistletoe in her house this Christmas?" Stubbs: "I think not. According to my understanding, she regards a device of that sort as unsportsmanlike."

Jones: "Have you selected your wife's Christmas present yet?" White: "I don't need to. She selected it herself two months ago. I've been busy ever since trying to select enough money to pay for ft." Crawford: "You seem to think your wife the most unreasonable woman in the world." Crabshaw: "You see, I mortgaged the house to buy her a car, and now she wants me to raise money on the car to purchase CSbristmas presents."