"TALES OF - - -COLONIAL SPORT.

Otago Witness, Issue 2685, 30 August 1905, Page 69

"TALES OF - - - COLONIAL SPORT.

By F. DA. C. De L'lsle.

Author of "Tales of Sahib Land ' "Tales of {he 23th 8.L.." "Tales of a Turf Detective " "Ta'es of Sport," etc.

No. II.— MY TEN-POUXDEE.

[All Rights Reserved.]

(For the Witness.) I picked him up in Kirk's Bazaar, MclI bourne, Australia, at an auction sale of blood stock. He was, bar one, the sorriest ', "crock" there. Still. Bar One was woise to i look at. My ten-pounder had not a,leg to stand on ;' he was "gone all round." Teddy Yuille said he was a disgrace to i the yards ; but as the owner had paid - the auction fee to enter him for sale, up he liad to go. But the auctioneer could not stand Bar One at any price. "Take him away." he said to Jimmy Surface, '"and sell him to the huntsman of the Oaklands Hounds. We can't turn the yards into a sale ring for cats' meat." i Jimmy was "broke," and he pleaded hard to have Bar One put up. If breeding went for anything, he ought to sell. So he was the first thoroughbred led into the ring. All the auctioneer's fervid eloquence was in vain ; nary a bid' would any of the flash — ahem! I apologise — high-toned sports congregated round the sale ring make for Bar One. So with a heavy heart Jimmy lugged him out of the yards. As he passed the rostrum the irate auctioneer growled sotto voce in his ear : "' Take the confounded clothes-horse to Foot 1;cray, and have him boiled down into German sausages. That's all he's fit for, anyway.' 1 After some time my ten-pounder hobbled into the ring. Ironical cheers greeted his semi-circular under.- landing?. "The next Melbourne Cup winner, gentlemen!" cried a paunchy bookie with i a grin. "Sold in Hingland for a fortune ! cried a funny trainer, who never owned a winner in bis life. "What are you sayin", my boy?" cried a white-hatted' leviathan, who cuddled an enormous cheroot, and who had huge diamonds growing out of every buttonhole on him. "He's not for sale : he belongs to the Chersey Lily. I'm goin' "Ome to pack 'im for de Eclipse Stakes, an' yen 'c vms, I'll get a divorce an' marry the bloomin' Chersey Lily myself !" '•'Now, then, gentlemen," cried the suctioneer, "here's a well-bred 'un if you like — Panic blood on one side and Navigator on the other. He's one of the best jumpers in the colonies, and smart, too, on the flat, or he wouldn't have nine hurdle wees to his credit. You all remember how easily he won the Open Hurdle Race at Williamstown last year!" "An 1 c fell down four times vhile tbe jockey was a-pullin' of 'im hup. Oh, yes ! we know !" cried the diamondiferous leviathan. '"You bet, we know !" "Now, then, what shall I start him at?" cried the xiuetioneer. '•Half a crown, if you'll chalk hit hup!"

answered one of the crowd. "Take him away," growled the auctioneer. "Five pounds!" cried a well-known crooked owner-trainer. "Six !"' cried a flashy bookie. "Seven !:1! :1 from another. "My boy, you'll be ruined !" "Oh. eight!" I stammered. And how did the cormorants glare at me ! I was an outsider, and they resented my interference. ''Nine!" said the cronk trainer. The usual pause followed, and after the usual "Going — going — going, for the la^t time," I hazarded "Ten!" Bang went the hammer on the desk, and I was the owner of a thoroughbred raceiiorse. "I'll lay a thousin' to one he will never win another race/ cried the diamondii'erous bookie. "A wager!" cried I, as I handed him my card and a sovereign, at the same time asking the auctioneer to bear witness to the transaction. "Oh, be d d. I v. as only joking ! ' cried the diamond grower. But his pals rounded on him. and, glad of the opportunity, they chaffed him unmercifully. "He's got you be^t, Barney!" cried the "cronk" trainer. "You'll have to go to graft to moke that up, I'll bet.'" "Let im 'aye the f-tones. Bainey, an' cry off the wager."' advised one of his pals. Finally, with great braggadocio, Mr Barney Melchoir book-ed the wager in his pocket book, and invited the ciowd to come next door and "blue" my very ecsilyearned sovereign. I paid my tenner, aiui had wy di-conso late purchase removed to my home at fcandringham, a subuib of Melbourne.

And now' t gentle reudei-j a woid in your

car. Fallen fmm the h! o h estate of an independent income of thousands a year, v,}\f\i 1 iculd keep many hrrses in tiaining in another country thin Australia, 1 had emigrated thither (having heard it described as the hnven of the impeccniouN aristocrat and the stoney-broke plunger) in the hopes of bung able to provide myself with the great es-t amount of sport upon the smallest outlay of cash. Metaphorically, 1 ti is in that frame of mind that is anxious to emulate the lilies of the field. "Considered comment croissentles lis dcs champ 5 -, ils no travaillent ni ne filent," as the French have it in their Holy Writ. "They toil not, neither do they spin! 1 ' But I was always anxious to "croisser" like the lilies. Rente my presence at the sals of blood stock ; hence my snapping up the idiotic wager of the cheroot -sucking bookie ; and hence my determination to win that wager. L My racehorse had a name, so I could not re-christen him. Bui in the interests of many honest hearts that my narrative , might plunge into heavy sorrow, I subdue the original, and substitute "Ten-pounder" . instead. '

Under my watchful eye — I am a vet. of some pretension*, amateur though 1 be — my illustrious purchase came en in great style, and I sat up night after night attending T-cii-pounder's legs, until they took pity on me, and became less curved than usual. As the time was glorious summer, and I resided by the sad sea waves, I was wont to give my champion plenty ot swimming exerci«-e, and it was really wonderful how sound he got. Tendons and sinews resumed their normal proportions, and by the advent of hoary winter (not bad for a lurgid sport, eh?) my. Neddy was capering about in all the glory of a new set of legs, and an abdomen (far neater word than stomach, and not nearly so vulgar as "belly") full of good oats.

One frolicsome morning, frightened by the sudden whistle of an approaching tram (you don't know the juggernauts they run in the Melbourne suburbs, or you would better understand the childlike timidity of my Bucephalus), my racehorse bolted with me — yes, he actually bolted ! And, what's more, he took me over the railway double in legular hurdleracing style, flying the rails in his strides.

When I succeeded in stopping him my first thoughts were of his legs, and I hastily dismounted to examine them. I breathed more easily after I had found everything 0.X., which, being translated freely, means "Oil correct." Then I clapped my hands together in ecsfacy as I pictured Ten-pounder leading a beaten field down the straight home.

But my long and varied experience warned me to be secret and circumspect ; for my experience had occasionally been of a peculiarly painful nature, "and visions of tho "steaks, chops, and sausages" of tho sixpenny hash foundries in the metropolis would sometimes intrude themselves upon the camera obscura of nvy imagination, forming an abhorrent blot upon an otherwise colourful and pleasant catalogue of reminiscences. Therefore, I was extremely circumspect. Though 1 longed for Mr Bookie's thousand pounds, yet I foresaw that I would have to use the greatest stategy (it would be low to say cunning) in order to bring off the "coup." With this object in view, I joined the Victoria Hunt Club during the ensuing winter, using Tenpounder as my hunter. You may take my word for it that I didn't bang him about any more than was absolutely necessary for him to qualify for a hunter's certificate. At the five meets that I rode him I was a, good "bad last" all the way. But my troubles ! I was always busy picking out the softest ppots for my necldy to gallop over. The last time I rode him for the nreessary qualification I was surprised to find Jimmy Surface out on a shapely-look-ing "blood" qualifj-ing for a hunter.

"What's that you're on, Jimmy?" I asked with interest.

'Oh, old Bar One, that you wouldn't look at in Kirk's Bazaar six months ago," he answered.

"G-o on ; you — you don't say so !" I reclied.

The horso had improved wonderfully — in fact, equally as well as mine had, and Jimmy was qualifying him for the Victoria, Hunt Club races. -I began to look upon him as a probable rival, but Jimmy informed me that Bar One's mission was the big race of the day — the Hunt Club Steeplechase.

During a confidential chat we had on our way home I told him of Barney Melchoir' s thousand-pound wager, and of nvy intention of having a try to win it.

"Good on you!" said Jimmy. "I'll give you a hand." We'll train our nags together."

And so we did. As the end of the hunting s-sason drew near the Victoria Hunt Club advertised their Hunt Club racing meeting. I entered Ten-pounder for the Hunt Club Hurdlew, and Jimmy entpred Bar One for the Hunt Club Steeplechase. A week before the meeting I thought it advisable to interview Mr Barney Melchoir, and with ihat laudablo object in vi«w Jimmy and 1 sauntered down to the Leviathan Club that night. They were hard at it bettina; on the coming events at the Victoria Hunt Club's meeting, and just as Jiuimv and I entered the room we heard Mr Melchoir inquire, in a pained voice. '"What that blanked Ttin-pounder was? Did anypody know the horse?" '"W'liy, Barney, that old so-and-po, that you saw sold at Kirk's Bnzaar last summer. You laid the buyer a thousand to a quid that he would never win another race, don't you remember?" cried one of the chosen in th? company. '"Oh, skippin' kangaroos ! What a beauty to rim in a hurdle iace. I think the waiter was a safe one. And what's this here Bar On^ in t lie Steeple, Solly" queried Mr Melchoir.

"That's another beruity bk^ the other. Barney — the one thai Jinmue Surface took

away with him lo make into polonies," rt plied Solly.

They all bughed at this, thinking it funny, no doubt. Then Mr Melchoir said :

"I'd like to lay them a thousand to one about that double ' '

"A wiigei !" I said, stopping out into the middle of tho saloon. ' Good-evening. Mr Melchou". You know me, I think. I wilL take that accommodating wager of yours five tim?s, and I tendered him a five-pound note. Now tho mlet of tbe Leviathan Sporting Club aie very strict. Or.cc 'i wager is called and accepted it must bo booked. Mr Melchoir v<a*> in ,i quandary. With wide-open mouth and bloated eyes lie feebly glared at mo. But his brothpr "bookies" urged him to dec. "I'm with you, Barney , ciied a. dia-mond-bespaugled bookie.

"Take me too!" slid aonther bookie, affectionately.

"And I'm with you. too '"' cried several others. So they formed a syndicate of 10, and accepted my fiver.

We. left the room standing to win bix thousand pounds over rhe double.

On the first day of the meeting was tho big race, the H>nt Club S-f-eeplechase. and Jimmy Surface tiu it e-i^ily on Ear One, a steeplechaser that laicr on accounted for the Grand National double of Hurdles and

Steeplechase at Flemingion. It would have done your heart good t;> have seen the faces of the Philistines aftPf that race. A mutes' funeral was nothing to it. especially as Ten-poun r ler had put up a, trial on the .same morning at Caulfield good enough to win any Grand National at Flemington. We vibitod the Leviathan Sporting Club"s rooms that nishi, aivl found Ten-pcundei 1 firmly instated as first, favourite by the public. But the "books" had ''No money Ten-pounde>' " as answe." to every inquiry about his price.

We were sunounded by a clamorous crowd of anxious bookies immediately upon our entry, all hungry to cry off.

"Would yon take c>e hundred to cry off the wagerss?" asked or.c. We most decidedly would not. '•Would ypu take six hundred?'' asked Mr Solly, contrite of hent. "No, most certainly not." 'Would yon take seven hundred?" cried another.

"Impossible! We're on a cert," we replied. "Eight, then?" "No!" "Nine?" "No!" A pause, deeply ond eloquently expressive, followed.

"Say. what will you take, then?" asked Mr Barney Melchoir.

"A half — say, three thousand" — answered Jimmy Surface.

Mr Barney Melchoir .talked to a desk, drew out a chesue for £2000, and a heavy, sigh heaving up from his twel\e-and-six-penny Oxford mat shirt tront, he waddled up to me, and in deeply expressive tones said :

"Last offer Scratch your horse first thing to-morrow morning, and I'll make it two thousm'!" at the same time holding the chequ-e within aa inch of my nose.

I was but morcal. One glance at Jimmy, an affirmative nod from him, and I grasped the cheque convulsively, as I said : "If your paper is good when I go to the bank the pen goes through by hor-e's name at 10.15 to-morrow morning." An audible sigh of relief fluttered round! th-n room. And we walked into the bar and had a big bottle of "gold-top" to tlie success of Bar One. We did not toasfc Ten-pounder, and I'll tell you why. Tenpounder broke down hopelessly on returning to his stable at Sandringham after his ti'ial at Caulfield, and! at the time of our visit to the Leviathan Sporting Club's rooms that night he was standing in hia box on thres legs, with the near foreleg the sizo of a cruiser's mainmast, and with as much show of winning a hurdle race as he had of jumping over a blus moon.

Sut -all is fair in love and Avar, and leii limes f.iiier in racing. I cashed Mr Melchoir's cheque next moraine before putting the pen through Ten-pounder's name. At the races evervbodv learnt of the calamity lhat had forced me to scratch mv horse for the race, and sympathisers with me were numerous. Bab Barnsy ancl his pals cut ma dead on the course. They seemed to consider themselves vastly injured. I wonrler how they would have fel* if I could have won with my Ten-pounder?

— Giraffes are such mimics rfiat, although their size might be supposed tn render them conspicuous, the most practised eye has been misled by the animal's resemblance to one of the dead tree trunks which abound in its haunts. Even lions have bee* known to gaze earnestly at a motionless giraffe, and, being unable to deckle that i< was not a tree, turn and make off.