PASSING NOTES.

Otago Witness, Issue 2664, 5 April 1905, Page 5

PASSING NOTES.

(From Saturday's Daily Times.)

No responsible public writer in Europe, no critic, editor, 'diplomatist, seems able quite to make up his mmd concerning the character of th© Czar. No other ruler, not even the Sultan, is more generally ill" l-liougM of. Yet there exists an undercurrent of belief running the other way. If Czar Nicholas knew King Lear and King CEdipus — the chances being that he knows neither — he might possibly be entitled to say with the one, I am a man more sinned against than sinning ; and with -the other, My crimes are things suffered rather than things done. Speaking for myself, I cannot include Nicholas II among Monarchs I Have Known, but I know his waxen effigy in Madame Tussaud's, and. ridiculous though the confession sound, my judgment of the man has always been influenced by it. He stands there in civilian dress by the side of his young wife, looking, the pair of them, like two Sunday school teachers oub for a walk. The writer of a tremendous philippic against the Czar in a recent Quarterly has now an article of the same kind in the National Review. He is a Russian and a good hater ; yet even 1 c acknowledges that the Czar is a domesticated person, thoroughly well tamed and brought to hand, — a treasure in the nursery. We have a picture of him " anxiously superintending the details of the bathing of his little son, the Grand Duke Alexis, afc the height of the diplomatic storm raised by the North Sea incident." It must have been somewhat earlier than this that the hero of that same North Sea incident had an illuminating experience.

What more idyllic than the pretty human weakness betokeiled by the joyful exclamation" with which the great potentate suddenly interrupted Rojd«stvensky making a report on the Baltic squadron : "' But are you aware that ne weighs 14lb?" ""Who. your Majesty?" asked the Admiral, his mind still entangled in questions of disij'lacsmeai't, quick-firing guns, and other kindred matters. " Tsie Heir to the throne," answered th,e happy father. Yet they say of this domestic model that on the morning after the St. Petersburg massacre he was heard " whistling lively airs in the Palace." Why not? Presumably he was whistling to the imperial 14-pounder.

It Is very lofty and public-spirited in London editors to say, as some of them are saying, that in neglecting to go ' out and get himself shot on the morning of the massacre the Czar lost " the opportunity of his life." Of his death, they mean. Had he met the strikers as requested he might have been brought down by a bullet from somebody deep in the crowd ; — but it would have been all in the way of business — the business of a. Czar. This may be- admitted ; yet it is not the sort of thing that sounds convincing to the father of a family, The Czar is an affectionate husband ; he has four or^five dear little girls and a. son and neir who turns the scale at 141b. In short he is an eminent illustration of the navy saying in Nelson's time — that the officer wh» marries is d 1 d for the> service. Yet, take him all in all, the Czar with his faults is a more amiable personality than the Kaiser with his virtues. His Germans are " the salt of the earth," proclaims the Kaiser ; — salt that has lost its savour, is the suggestion of one of my correspondents, who in Germany would doubtless be clapped into aurance for lese majeste. "Every new German battleship was another pledge of peace " — a sentiment in harmony with the same preacher's gospel of the "mailed fist." Finally, and to wind up the blazing indiscretion of which these are scintillations, th© Kaiser indicated the terms and conditions on which

I lie might be prepared to undertake "the sovereignty of the world." This is positivgl^r 6ve.v.TVttelmin£.. As we are unlikely

Chanibers's Cyclopedia: "The appeaicuica { t Mr j^tey. he said . « The land af Halley s comet in 1456, just as the Turks . -„ . . ■ i i i liad become masters of Constantinople a«<i tax ' without exemption, would be an threatened an advance into Europe, -was re- equitable lax, so that we could do away gardecl fey Chri^teiid'om with superstitious with the Customs duties." It is an answer dread, and to the Aye" Maria, was added tie t h a t was repeated to Mr Ansfcey, aaitl, Sthe^melT 1 ' r ° m ' U ' k '' comin S from a representative speaker, it "gives food for some thought.

to develop that perfect confidence in the Hohenzollerns which alone would induce the Kaiser to reign over us, our case, I suppose, is a sad one. Yet not altogether new. " Then I cannot marry you, my pretty maid"; " Nobody asked you, sir," she said.

At tho Garrison Hall the other evening the Rev. Curzon-Siggers drank tea with the Methodists ; after tea lie made them a speech. How these uncanonical proceedings strike certain of the reverend gentleman's co-religionists may be gleaned from a metrical complaint which has been sent to me, and which I here insert, adding that anyone who may wish to dissent will be permitted lo do so in verses of equal length with these and of not inferior smoothness. I couldn't say fairer than that. Ancient and Modetsk — a Passixg Xote. Long time gone by when Balak wished To purchase Balaam's curse Ho held before that prophet's eye A very well filled purse. But times are changed, and prophets now Are (rotted out to bless — As when John Wesley's recreant hosts

Seek S-gg-rs's caress ! The ancient made his protest grand Against the proffered pelf, Yet started forth not disinclined To earn it for hinxself. But, strange to say, the platform gainecf, The pondered barm and scorn Fell from hisjips in balmy words Like fresiheKing dews at morn. Perchance the modern Balaam's skill Will prove but labour ""vain, — The blessing fail, and shame be still Self-gloTy's only gain.

The Tablet editor's persistency over those ; elusive divinity degrees and the evasions of " Civis " thereanent begins to move my admiration. It's dogged as dees it ! — says he, toiling at his stone of Sisyphus, and every week begins again as fresh as paint. Not always in a good c.ause is such devotion seen, and this cause is a singularly bad one. • But tfie Tablet editor-, I fancy, has consecrated himself to the service of lost causes. He must be under a vow. Here is something that otherwise there would be no explaining: One must jnake generous allowances for the intellectual limitations of a man [" Civis," to wit] who could start a controversy on cliviifiiy before ho knew the meaning of the word ■" diviniiy." and who was capable of telling your readers in solemn earnestness the following painful yarn: — That a comet was once upon a time caught aiftl baptised into the comuramon of the Ca+hoTie- Omrcli, and tha-t, forsomo high crime or misdemeanour, it was deprived of that commianion by one. Pope Calixtus — long before it was ever known or hoard of. — I am, etc., j Editoh. New Zealand Tablet. | March 2S. . ! There is sometbrhg fishy about tlie syntax of this toward the end ; but that's nothing. Nor is it anything that the Tablet editor doesn't know his own Church history. He has shown the greatest repugnance to an examination on that subject, even though he should be allowed to appoint his own examiner. As to what has or has not been said in Passing Notes, which is a branch of history strictly modern, he is the prey of illusions and vain imaginations. Never till now lias it been said that "a_ comet was once upon a time caught and baptised into the communion of the Catljplie Church." This delightful proposition is the Tablet editor's, not mine. For the spiritual terrors which Pope C'alixtus arrayed against Halley's comet in 1456, and, in the same breath, against the Turks who at that date had just captured Constantinople, there are authorities ; wlien the Tablet editor was

on this subject before I quoted them. • Here are two : j

Knight's Cyclopasdia of Arf s and Sciences : " With the riew of averting the evil influence oi the comet's presence Pope Calixtus ordered prayers to be offered in all the "Western Churches ; he also in a famous bull anathematised at once the Turk and the comet."

— etcetera, etcetera ; — despite its meriC this classic jingle has to be shortened down. Dickie extends himself rather en the triumphal progress down, the aisle, where flowers are sprerd beneath their tread by fairy nyinpns who pirouette, in shorts ; aud where commenting on the bride the factory maidens afc the side say "Oh my ! — and ain't she chippy !" Finally the happy pair achieve their carriage under protection of the- police. " This is what we'll hsrve — The fashionable splice," Cries Dickio in a transport; And Tottie sighs, " How nice ff — • But Dickie-biixl!" — she falters, " Before you ask Papa, I think — instead — if you don't mind— We'll Lava the Begistrai!"

Dear " Civis," — Ii is sonic time since yo« have had one of the illuminating conversations with Mrs Civis, which I, in common with many of my sex, so much enjoy. I use the word: "illuminating" advisedly, for, being intensely interested in all current topics, political and. otherwise, I have often gained the longed-for information on sxich matters from your answers? to Mrs Civis, that lady invariably having aske<£ the questions I'longed to put. I look upon your solution of the Thibet question many mouths ago as a case* m point. That I supplied a solution of the Thibet question I believe without difficulty, though I disremember what it was. And! naturally I have passed on to Mrs Civis

' the other contents of this nattering letter. A large and intelligent public, I tell her, is all agog for our " illuminating conversations." "I suppose the illumination is thought to come mostly from my side?" — she insinuates. " Madam," I reply, " that's as may be ;—l'm; — I'm not so sure ; — the boot's on the other leg, 1 fancy." '"It is iiofc a question of boots and of legs," saya she, majestically ; " the question is whether most of the illumination that reaches the public through you doesn't originate elsewhere, and whether you're going to deny it." "Oh dear 'no, not at all! — I'm humble enougli for anything jusfc now. Perhaps you will kindly illuminate on this scrape I have got into with the unco quid. You see, lam no Puritan, I don't frown on amusements, I am not for multiplying commandments to multiply sins, I am not prohibition, I am nob Bible-in-Schools ; — wherefore they have it that J. am ' not evangelical. ' And so, like* Socrates, I must needs be a corrupter of

Here is ' Cephas ' — who might be

an apostle and must at least be a saint — and here is the Rev. W. Saunders, botlt of that opinion." " You might add the editor of the Tablet," says she. " Thanks-, so I might, — and that rather lets me off, I fancy. Anyhow here are the three of them unanimously lamenting over ' Civis * as 'unfriendly to religion.'" "Well, you rniglit be better than you are," says she. "Who's a-deniging of it, Betsy? I mighfc be a ruling elder ; but I a' int." "It is this deplorable spirit of banter " — she continues. "That's so; now you hit it. I ought to borrow their old sermons ami catch the style. What you recommend is a respectable dulness." " Well, if it is,'* she chuckles, " you won't have to strain after it ; you know you are dull bynature." Thereupon a silence fell ; a. gloom overspread, — with a sense of strained relations. But later, as we always do, as clearly we were of old predestined to do, we made it up.

| Somewhat startling -was the statement of a representative of the Otago Trades andh Labour Council at th© meeting of the I<antl Commission en the- 28th. Mr R. Ferguson was the. witness under examination, and in

' Voice that breathed o'er Eden '— Tears and osculations. Mob of frenzied women Fight to get a view, Climb into the pulpit Top the topmost pew, — M?ndelssohn — the Wedding March! Organist in throes ; Now we turn to face 'em, Arai-in-arrc, here goes ! . . ."

Lest my authorities should seem fo he only English and Protestant, I ,add a sentence from a French scientific -writer, Bouvard, whom the Tablet editor may inspect, if he cares, at the Times office :

La cornels de Halley. . . son apparition de 1456, epoque ou elle fut excommuniee par lo pape, en meme temps que Mahomet II qyd venait de s'eraparer do Constantinople. It is no discredit to a mediaeval pope that in these matters he was no wiser than the wisdom of his time.

Fashionable society in a northern town is disposed rather to pity itself as having been defrauded of a fashionable wedding, the bride-elect preferring to pass under the secular hands of the Registrar. As I make it out, the case stands thus :.

Eadie's Hotel at Omalcau was completely destroyed by fii'3 at 3 o'clock on the 27th ir-st. Th© building and furniture w-era insured for £650 in the Manchester office, but th© total loss is estimated at £1200. Th© fir© is exipposed to have been caused through th& oeiiing of on© of the rooms ■taking fire from a lamp that was left burning. Mr Eadie is stated to have had £60 ia notes burnt.

An emu hunt, in which the ilaj^or and councillors of Timaru t-ook part, as the outcome of Mr J. S. Rutherford's offer to present two of th© birds to the Timaru Park if the city councillors would catch them, was of a very diverting nature (says tfoe> Timaru Post). The hunt took place at Mr Rutherford's Opawa Station, and with one exception the councillors were on foot. The huntsmen spread themselves out over tha fields to round up the. game, and walked foF a couple of miles, ever on the gui vive. A 6 last they were l-ewarded with a sight of tha game ; emus being seen feeding in a deep valley. On coming closer the birds, which were being driven, were seen to consist o£ two young emus and one old one. Theu tha fun began, and for a time was fast and furious. To recount all that happened in th© attempt to yard the, birds would servo no useful end j suffice it to say that the so&nea when the birds got a*' break "' on and the councillors went in hot pursuit werej of an intensely exciting, not to say hilarious, nature. At last the rofraetoryi emus consented to be yarded, and in a sheep pert about two miles from the starting poinfe they wero lefc for th© night, Mr Rutherford undertaking to truck them to Timaru the* ne-xfc paorxunjj.

A Fashionable Splice. Pickle pops the question, Tottie whithpejtlj, "Yetnl" Ytim yum yum, and one yum more, Yum yum yum till death! Then Dickie to his Tottie: " We can't be married twice ; Our once and onoe for all shall be "The fashionable splice. Cabs with wedding- favours Hither, thither, rushing; Factory girls and nursery maiclg HurryixJg, crowding, crushing, Coachman gay beribboned Tools you down the street, Carpet over pavement Saves your dxickie feet. Parson in a surplico Meets you at the door; You ccme mincing after, He trips on before — Up his aisle shop-walking, Marshals you within ;—; — Organ bleats the ' Bridal March,' Wagner — ' Lohengrin.' Choristers and acolytes— ffi'fV ?i1 dCf "™4.i'nTi«f— -