RUDYARD KIPLING AND THE JAPS.

Otago Witness, Issue 2402, 15 March 1900, Page 60

RUDYARD KIPLING AND THE JAPS.

Rudyarcl Kipling made one voyage round the world avowedly as a globe trotter. He was at that time a reporter for the Pioneer, published at Allahabad. At regular intervals he wrote letters describing what he saw: "Nagasaki" (lie said) "is inhabited entirely by children. The grown-ups exist on sufferance. A four-foot child walks with a threefoot child, who carries on her back a one-foot child, who — but you will not believe, mo if I fcav That tho scale runs down to 6in little Jap dolls, pitch as they used to sell in the BurlingLou Aicade. Tiieso dolls -wriggle and laugh. _ They are tied up in^ blue bedgown, which is tied by a sash, which again ties up the bedgown of the carrier. Thus, if you untie that sash, baby and but little bigger brothel" are at once perfectly naked. I saw a mother do this, and it was for all the world like the pooling cf hr.rd-boiled eggs." His description of his first visit to a teahouse is very amusing :—: — " I assure you there is no dignity in sitting down on the steps of a tea-house and struggling with muddy boots. And it is impossible to be polite in your stockinged feet when the floor under you is as smooth as glass and a pretty girl wants to know when you would like tiffin. Take at least oiw pair of beautiful socks when you come thi3 way. Get them made of embroidered sambhur skin, or silk, if you like, but do not stand, as I did, in cheap striped brown things, with a darn at the heel, and try to talk to a tea-girl." He closes in this happy vein: — "My very respectable friends at all the clubs and messes, have you ever, after a good tiffin, lolled on cushions and smoked, with one pretty girl to fill your pipe and four to admire you in an unknown tongue? Toil do not know what life is. I looked round me at that faultless room, at the dwarf pines and creamy cherry blossoms without, at O'Toyo bubbling with laughter because I blew smoke through my nose, and at the ring of Mikado maidens over against the golden bearskin rug. Here was colour, form, food, comfort, and beauty enough for half a year's contemplation. I would not be a Burman any more."

— "It's a 'lessless' age," remarked Simpers. '"What do you mean?" inquired Gkiles. "Here's a couple who entered upon a loveless marriage, drove away in a horseless carriage, and received all- the congratulations by wireless telegraph}*-." — Symp: Raised. — An Irish lady, having had a few angry words with her huioand one day, had occasion, a few moments later, to send her servant for some fish for dinner. "Bridget," said the mistress, "go down the town at once and get me a plaice." "Indade. an' I will, ma'am," said Bridget; "and I may as well get wan for myself, too, for I can't stand the masther no more than yerself."