RECOLLECTIONS OF A SCOTCH TOWN.

Otago Witness, Issue 2323, 8 September 1898, Page 50

RECOLLECTIONS OF A SCOTCH TOWN.

By J. T. S. 0. 11. One of the institutions of the toAAm was I Bell M'Pick, the rag and bane Avife. She j was a Aery tall, lanky, grizzly-haired, Avild- j looking Avoman, and in her general appear- i ance bore a striking resemblance to Sir i Walter Scott's immortal creation, Meg ' Merrilees. Bell, hoAvever, devoted her , talents to the necessities of everyday j life, and didn't bother her - head with prophecy — her efforts in that ! | line being confined to the forecasting of Avhat Avould happen' — when she caught them — to any little boys Avho roused her ire j by calling out, " Bell M'Pick, Bell M'Pick, i yer candy rock's as teuch's a stick." j A picturesque figure Avas Bell as she trim- j died her barrow up the street, the said bar- | row being gaudily decked out Avith coloured paper Avindmills and flags. Her Avell-knoAvn cry of " Candy rock, candy rock," varied occasionally by "BraAV flags for auld rags," brought to her many a little boy or girl Avith a bone or tAvo, a feAv rags, an old ; horse shoe, or anything that could be con- ' A r erted into a baAvbee, for which Bell, after ramming these articles into a "pock" that was suspended between the shafts of the ' barrow, would exchange, according to A r alue ■ received, one or other of her enticing com- j modities. | Bell was also the maker and vendor of a ' dark-coloured and effervescing beverage which bore (he rather fierce title of " treacle- . scoot." The chief ingredients of this yeast- , like preparation Avere " barm " from the " breAver's, sugar, treacle, and water, and i given a wooden bowl of real Perthshire ■ "panritch" — Avhich Avas usually of a con- j sistei\cy sufficient to support the leg of ■ a table — a howi spoon, and a bottle of the i genuine " Bell M'Pick," a hungry man c r ! boy had all the requisites of a satisfying | and brawn-making meal. In the summer j tune it Avns a common thing for bottles of j the properly-prepared article to either burst i or blow their corks out, and 1 haA r e kn-oAvn i of a respectable eight-day clock having its ! staid features damaged by the cork from an : unmannerly bottlf of " scoot " at the oppo- < site end of the room. | Sandy, the shoemaker, to Avhom I referred ■ in a former portion of these humble " P.ccol- ' lections," Avas an intelligent, kindly, humour-loving old soul, and Avas noted as being a most expert trout and salmon fLsher. I have often heard of a feat he performed in hooking, playing, and lin ling a la v ge ' salmon while firiiing for small trout with a ' light " ca=t line " and very small fly hook. I am afraid to mention lioav mairy pounds ' the fish Avas reputed to Aveigh, but it was ahvays referred to by those Avho had seen it as being a "Avapper." j Sandy had a large collection of fishing stories, and although anecdotes of that de^ . scription nre generally vieAved with a cer- ; tain amount of most unbrotherly suspicion-, ' I moke bold to append one. "It Avis jist abloAv White's Hole," SamVy used to say ('• White's Hole was a deep pool in the ! river where a man of that name had been j droAvned Avhilst bathing, " on yon lang bed o' graiA*el, an' A aa-js jist workin' a foAvr j p'und troot when the deil o' a watcher , screiclied oot at me across the Avatter. Man, i ye wad hardly believe me, but A clean for- ' got till A saAv the watcher that it wasna' the season." (Here Sandy used to serai oh

his bristly old head Avith Ms aAvl and give his listeners a piercing glower from beneath his bushy grey eyebroAvs). " Weel, A could see he avis a stranger, so A never let j on that A saAv 'urn, bit jist mindit ma troot : — there Avis a spate, ye- ken, an' A kent fine he couldna' come ower Avithoot gaun aboot five mile roond be the brig. His nabs Avis nearly daft whin he saAv me cleekiu' , ma troot an' pittin't in ma creel, but that 1 didna' bauther me inuckle, an' jist as he yelled oot some fearfu' language at me \ made anither cast, an' afore ye could say ■ ' Jeck Robison ' A hookit anilher ane. Fet'h j ye should a' seen ma frien' dancin' at that 1 ' But a' the time A never let on A saAv 'urn, an' efter Ad pit this ane in ma creel — it wis abcot a pund wecht — a stane splashed j intae the watter jist ahint me. A never j let on, though, but in a Avee Avhile anither ane gaed 'sploush' richt afore me, so A • gloAvered ahint me, an' up the Avatter, an' ! doon the watter, bxit A couldna' see onyJ body, ye ken" (here the old rascal used ! to wink), "so A jist pit on anither Avorrum ' an' made a fresh cast. Ma man Avis roariu' j oot something dreadfu', so Avhin he threw ; anither stane richt forninst me A looked i OAver kind o' staurtlit like, an' whin he . yelled oot, 'Ye bald-headit auld poacher, : All gie ye six months for this,' A jist 1 pintit tae ma mooth. an' ma lugs, an' lookit as silly-like as A cauld, an' them laid doon mi rod an' made a lot o' wark wi' ma fingers — • like a dummy ye ken. On this ma gentle- . man sAvore fearfu', but A coiild not 1 c i bauthered oi-y mair, an' as it avis gettin' I late A made aff hame through the Avud Avi' j a fine creelfu'. A hard he Avis in the toon speerin' aboot a dummy efter that, but Le never got 'urn !" A vigorous young bachelor of about 75 was Hugh, the tailor. Hugh Avas the possessor of a magic lantern, Avith Avhich he was always ready and Avilling to help at any entertainment, and being a. little shortsighted he used to increase the amusement 'of his audiences by unconsciously mixing up the titles of his slides, an Indian temple, perhaps, being announced as an elephant, Avhile on one occasion he referred to a picture of Mr Gladstone as being that of the " roarin' lion o' the desert !" A song from Hugh was always called foi after the lantern o\> hiuition Avas over, and he Avas only too glad j to oblige Avith his favourite, "The rid, ,' Avhitc, and bIeAV," AA'hich he would roll out in most spirited style. Like a good many members of the order of the needle, -Hugh was fond of a " wee drap," and on periodical occasions his little shop — to reach which you had to descend a couple .of steps — would have the shutters up for a Aveek at a time. He must have had extraordinary powers of digestion, as I haA~e seen him, whe» pulling himself together lifter one of his sprees, get a large bowl, into AA r hich he Avould pour a large j quantity of kail broth, then add a slice of i bread broken up, a couple of raAv eggs — i shells and all — a cup of tea, a sliced raw onion, wme fried liver and bacon, salt, pepper and mustard, and would then stir well Avith a spoon the Avhile he added half a tumborful of 11 o.p. whisky. This robusb mixture he Avould enconrpass Avithout a ! quiver, j The district Avas visited at regular interKvals by a gang of long-haired and fiercelooking gipsies, who Avould camp out on the | hills, and there make heather brooms, pot ; scrubbers, horn spoons, and household requi- , sites of that kind, which they avoulc! afterj wards haAvk from door to door in the toAvn. Many a guidwife has been frightened by the I savage appearance of these nomads — added | to the fact that a former member of the tribe had been hanged for murder — into buying, Avhether she needed it or not, one or j other of these articles. Mozambique, one I of the toAvn's most skilful poachers, has been i hea.ru to say that he could neA 7 er snare so I many hares or rabbits in the vicinity of the j gipsies' camping ground after they had gone i as he could prior to their arrival, which seemed to add Aveight to the prevalent impression that these Avanderers lived Avell. Any reminiscences of C , or, in fact, of almost any other Scotch town,, Avould be incomplete Avithout some reference to the I kirk. The Free Kirk there Avas presided 1 over by the Rev. Mr H , a most kind gentleman, but its pulpit Avas sometimes , occupied by ministers of world-wide celebrity. I have myself listened in that church | to the eloquent words of Dr Candlish, Dr Norman M'Leod, Rev. George Gilfillan (of Dundee), and other famous preachers. The last-named gentleman differed someAvhat in his manner of reading his sermon from that usually adopted by ministers of less originality. The Free Kirk congregation of C was, like many others in Scotland, more inclined to look Avith favour on a minister Avbo preached his sermon " oot o' 'is heid " than one Avho read it. What, then, was the astonishment of the large number of people Avho flocked to hear the famous George Gilfillan. when that great pulpit orator, after giving out his text, calmlyopened a roll of manuscript somewhat less than a Daily Times, leant his elbows on uhe desk in front of him. Avith his MS. held out at arm's length, and, without the slightest attempt at an apology, proceeded to read his sermon. Why, even elder G forgot to go to sleep !

CONSUMPTION Oil PHTHISIS Is a constitutional Avasting disease in which the lung* are gradually destroyed by morbid deposits of tubercle and consequent ulceration. To the bacilli of these deposits Toavnexd'b CtSNAirox Cur.-c is highly antagonistic, and in the eavlv &t3p; e =; of the disease id sufficiently pciAvevful'to ovcrcoino and destroy thf srerins on Avhich the progress of the disease depends Apart from this the valuable soothing properties of the cure arc such as to speedily allay the racking cough and so promote the patient's recoA'ery. It is a certain cure in. ordinary colds, recent cough, loss of A'oice, bronchitis, bronchial asthma, whooping couprh. and croup, while its soothing and gercnicidal properties render it of the greatest A - alue in influenza, pleurisy, pneumonia, and catarrh. Sold eA'eiywhere. Price, 2s 6d. — AdArt.

■ — Questioned.—" Auntie, do you always say expire?" — " Why do you ask, dear" — • " Oh, just because papa said you were on© of those people AA-ho neA T er say die."

— Sammy : " Vas money der root okf all evil, fader?" Isaac Slim :* " Yes, Sam ; so you must dry and do all the good you cai% in life by gedding it away from jjeojiW*