Chapter XXII. To Err is Human.
Instead of keeping behind her straight home, I turned from the main road and, witn my mind full of gloomy thought?, wandered about the dark quiet thoroughfares in the neighbournood of Oampden Hill, until, having" walked for over an hour undecided how to acr, I awoke to a consciousness that I was befora my own house. When I entered I opened a telegram lying on the hall table and found it was from Loru Warnham, stating that he was leaving the Premier's suddenly, and asking me to call at Berkeley square at 6. It was then a quarter' to 6, and I saw that 'even by cab I mnsfc be 10 minnteß late for the appointment. '♦Has my wife returned, Juckes ? " I asked my faithful man, who stood ready to reiieve me of hat and coat. " Yea, sir. She returned an hour ago, and is now in the drawing room." My first impulse wae to return to Berkeley square without seeing her, but, unable longer to bear the suspense, I allowed Juckeß to ) take my things, and entered the room where | she awaited me. j " Ah, Geoffrey 1 " ehe exclaimed, jumping I to ber facn with an exprcssiou of joy md j coming forward to meet me. " I expected ! yoa home long ago, dearest." And che raised her face for the habitual kiss. " Ob," I said coldly, placing her away frwrt me without caressing her. " Have you beea home loDg?" f " A long, long time," she answered, regarding my coldness with unfeigned surprise. " Where have you been to-day 1 " I inquired rather sharply, taking up a position on the hearthrug, with my back to the bright wood fire. "This morniDg I went to Mr Praga's studio and gave him a aitting. He is painti ing my portrait tor the Academy, you j know." " Yes," I answered ; "he told me so at the club the other day. Whero else have yoa j been 1 " " Why are you so anxious to have a complete record of my doings 1 " she asked, pout- ! ing. " You seem absurdly auspicious." I smiled bitterly. Since her return .she had exchanged her tailor-made gown for »■ handsome dinner dress, and wore ac her only ornament a string of pearls, ray wedding gift. | She stood gaziDg at me with her dark blue eyes wide open and brows arched in wellfeigned .reproach. "You did not return to lunob," I said ! quietly. " No ; I went to Pont streot," she answered. " Mother was so fer.rf.ully up»et." I "Why?" "Last night she detected Helmholtz in the act of 'opening a letter ho had taken from tho postman. It contained a oheque, ml&
she was compelled to discharge him at a znoment'«s notice." "I understood he was quite a model servant," I said in genuine surprise at this latest development. To me it was astounding that a shrewd officer like Renouf should have thus allowed himself to be caught napping. "Mother thought most highly of him," sbe went on. " But it now appears that for the past few weeks she has had suspicions tbat her letters were being tampered with, for two cheques Bent by tenants for rent have been stolen." " I never thought very much of him," I said. 41 Neither did I," she declared. "He had Buch a silent, cunning way, and moved so softly that dozens of times when I have .turned suddenly I have been quite startled to find him standing close to me. I'm glad mother has got rid of him. She packed him off bag and baggage." " Did he protest his innocence 1 " " No. He treated her with cool indifference, placed his things in his portmanteau leisurely, hailed a cab, and went eff without askiDg.for his wages." I was silent. The reason Renouf should descend to steal cheques was inexplicable. Oae thing, however, appeared clear — namely, tbat he had taken an unusual interest in the nature of Mrs Laing's correspondence. To me it was a matter for congratulation that as he had been detected by his mistress and discharged he could not cast upon me the blame for his betrayal. "What did you do after lunch?" I at last inquired, returning to my charge. " I went shopping," she replied, amiling. •• With whom 1 " " Alone." " Were you alone the whole time ? " I inquired, regarding her intently. Her lips quivered slightly, and her glance Wavered. " Yes," she answered ; " I did not meet Anyone I knew." •' That is a lie, Ella ! " I cried. "It is not," she stammered, pale and agitated. " I have told you the truth." "To prevaricate is utterly useless," I said angrily. " I followed" you through Kensington Gardens, where you were walking with ;rour lover. 1 " "My lover 1 " she cried hoarsely, in dismay. " He — he is not my lover. I had never seen him before ! " " Then by your own admission you have Abandoned all respect for me and yourself. You are addicted to strolling alone with any idiot who flatters you." " I swear I do not," she retorted. " You misjudge me entirely." And sbe placed her trembling hand upon my arm. But I shook it off wrath fully,' saying : "I have discovered the truth, alas 1 too late. While making pretence to love me you prefer the society of other men. I was a blind fool, or I should have discovered the fact, plain to eyerybody the, that Ogle was your lover, and that you mourned for him when he met the fate he so justly deserved." " He never uttered one word of Jove to me, Geoffrey," she protested. " How can you make such horrible charges against me when I love you so dearly 1 " she cried, bursting into a torrent of tears. "Because," I said with emphasis — "because I have myself followed you this evening. Surely Kensington Gardens is not the spot where a wife should take recreation, unless .clandestinely, as you have done 1 No, this is not the first, occasion you have lied to me, Ella ; but it shall be the last." " The last ! " she gasped, glancing up at ! me. " What do you mean ? " " I mean that I can have no further confidence in yon, and that we are better apart." . "You don't intend to leave me. Sorely you would never be so cruel, Geoffrey 1 It would kill me." " I have loved you, Ella," I said hoarsely, after a pause brief and full of suspense. "No man could have loved a woman with a passion more tender than I have done, but now that I have discovered how basely 1 have been deceived my affection has turned to hatred." " You hate mcl " she wailed. "Ab, no, you cannot — you shall not," she cried as, rushing towards me, she threw both arms around my neck, and notwithstanding my efforts to avert" her pressed her tear-stained face to mine. Roughly I unclasped her armi and cast her from me, sajing : •• I have resolved. Nothing will cause me to raconsider my decision. We must part." " It is not like you, Geoffrey, to be cruel to . a womaD," she said reproachfully, standing before me. " I admit I have acted foolishly, but that man you saw was not my lover. I care for no one except your own dear self." " Termß of endearment are unnecesiary," I answered impatiently, turning from her. "Such expressions from one who has so
I grossly deceived me are absolutely nauseatirig. I have striven for your social advancement and have loved you dearly, but from this moment you are ray wife only in name." She buried her face in ber hands and was seized by a fit of hysterical sobbing. All her self-control had vanished at the instant she realised that I knew the truth, and she now stood before me bent ard penitent. " Forgive me," she whispered earnestly. " Forgive me, Geoffrey." 41 No," I answered with firmnass. " I cannot trust you." " Overlook this incident, and I will never again give you cause for jealousy," she exclaimed. " I will do anythmg you ask, only have patience with me." " I have already had patience," I augwered. " Yet, deceived as I am daily, we can live together no longer." 41 But I love you," she declared with fierce earnestness, fixing her fathomless eyes upon me. "If I lose you I shall kill myself." "It is your own fault entirely," I said. " You have chosen to act in this manner, and whatever are the consequences they are of your own seeking. I suppose you will tell me next that this man who was with you compelled you to meet him." " That is the absolnte truth," she faltered. "Ab, always the same lame tsle," I observed in disgust. " I have not forgotten that night at the Nook when I watched you walking with Beck. No, Ella, there is some strange mystery about it all that I don't like. You pretend to love me ; but you have some ulterior motive." " There is a mystery, it is true," she admitted, her eyes dimmed with tears — " a mystery so strange and startling that when you know the truth you will stand aghast and dumbfounded. But with its elucidation you will have knowledge of how I have suffered and striven for your sake ; therefore I can only pray tbat the revelations that must accrue may be hastened, for, although to-day you regard me as base apd deceitful, you will tben learn how muoh one woman has endured and sacrificed because she loved you." ; " Then we must part until this mystery is cleared up," I said calmly, my heart full of grief. " You refuse to take me, your husband, into your confidence, therefore I can place no further reliance on your word." " Think 1 " she cried, clutching my arms convulsively. " Why should the happiness of both of us be wrecked by a mere mis«nderstanding 1 " " A misunderstanding 1 " I echoed. "It is assuredly more than that." 41 No," she answered, endeavouring to stifle her sobs. " You misunderstand me, believing me false to you, whereas I am acting solely in our mutual interests." 41 To walk alone with a stranger is surely not acting in your husband's interests ? " I .observed bitterly. 41 Ah, you are mistaken," she said quickly. " When all is explained you will regret the cruel words you have uttered this evening." " Have I, then, no cause to object to your acquaintance with this man 1 " I inquired, looking sharply at her. 44 None whatever. He Is neither my lover nor my friend." " What is his name 1 " "I do not know. He did not tell me," she replied. "Was this the only occasion you had met ? " "It was." - " He spoke to you casually in the street, I suppose 7 " 41 No, we met by appointment at Victoria station," she answered quite frankly. "By appointment 1 Then you know him ? " j " No, our meeting was arranged by a third ! person . It was by no means of an amatory character, I assure you." 41 What was its object ? " I asked. Slowly she shook her head. " I cannot tell you without relating to you facts that I dare not yet divulge." * 41 Ah 1 as I thought," I cried in anger. 44 You refuse always to explain. As each week passes the mystery surrounding you increases." 41 Unfortunately I cannot prevent it," she answered in a low, earnest tone. " Before we married I told you plainly that I intended to seek the truth of the conspiracy against Dudley's life, and you did not object." "Why not leave that wretched affair to the police and secure our own happiness ? " I urged. " Because the police are powerless. They can have no clue." 41 Is it then absolutely necessary that you should attain this end?" I inquired dubiously. " Are you ready to sacrifice your own home and husband in order to ascertain the truth regarding a crime 1 " " Yes, It is absolutely imperative," she replied emphatically. " Before perfect happiness caa be ours we mast both be aware
of the causes which led to Dudley's sadden ' death. Towards that end lam striving, and knowing what I do, I am regardless of your suspicions and your cruel words. If we part — well, it will be you who one day will be filled with bitter regret ; and as for me, Ishall not pause in my merciless quest." Often she had told me that to ascertain the true cause of Dudley's death was, next to her duty as my wife, her main objeot in life, and these words, uttered with an earnestness that was genuine, bore out her most frequent declarations. Glancing at the facts as a whole it was not surprising that I should have suspected Dudley of having been her lover, whose death she intended to avenge. In silence and hesitation I paced the room that she had furnished with suoh exquisite taste. A dozen times she asked forgiveneis, but no word passed my lips. She stood motionless, her head bent in submission, her hands clasped before her, awaiting my decision. Her pale, tear-stained face betrayed signs of a terrible breathless suspense, she fearing that I intended to cast her off, while I could not bring myself to any firm belief that her declarations of affection .were genuine. Between us there yawned a gulf of darkness and mystery whioh hourly grew wider and more impassable. " Tell me that you'll still be patient and wait," she implored at last. " Surely you can see how intensely I love you and how utterly aimless will be my life if we part ? " " This mystery is, I confess, Ella, driving me to distraction," I said, halting at last before her, " Cannot you confide in me 1 I will preserve silence, I promise." "No, no," she gasped in fear. " I—lI — I dare not." Her attitude was one" of deep dejectiorj, yet I could not fail to notice, even at this moment of her abject despair, how beautiful she was. But a look of unutterable terrdr was in her deep blue eyes, and upon her handsome features was an expression as though, dreading exposure, ahe were haunted by sonre terrible ghost of the past. . •' You told me this once before," I said gravely, " and I trusted you. To-day I have discovered my confidence ill-placed." " Trust me once again," she cried hoarsely. " Only once, and I will show you ere long that your suspicions are utterly without foundation." I took another turn up and down the drawing room, my hands clasped behind my baclr, my gaze fixed upon the carpet. I was still undecided. With a sudden impulss she rushed forward, and flinging her arms about my neck kissed me, next second bursting into tears and burying her fsce upon my shoulder. My band unconsciously stroked her hair, and, bending, I pressed my lips upon her soft cheek. Then she knew that I had forgiven, and holding back her sobs with difficulty raised her face, and kissing me passionately thanked me in a low broken voice, assuring me that I should never regret the step I had taken. During half an hour we remained together, she full of love, and confidence, I admiring and hopeful. I was glad I had not acted rashly nor left her as I had intended, and as we went in to dinner arm in arm we laughed together, joyous in each other's love. After we had eaten, I smoked a cigarette and lingered as long as possible, happy with my well-beloved ; then kissing her fondly I was compelled to take a hansom to Berkeley square, promising her to return at the earliest possible moment, and expressing confidence that our love would last always. The Earl, grumbling at my tardy arrival, was busy in his library with a number of important despatches relating" to our affairs in the East. Wnen he had expressed displeasure that I had not been waiting to receive him, he added : "But there, I suppose now you are married, Dsedes, your wife ie exacting — they always are. She likes you to dine with her, eh?" " Yes," I admitted smiling ; " I did dine at home." "Ah, I thought so," snapped the shrewd old Minister. "A good dinner and your wife's smiles were of more consequence to you than England's prestige with the Sultan, eh?" I made no answer to this sarcasm, but began busying myself with the correspondence, packing it away in the despatch-bag and sealing it for delivery to Hammerton; the messenger, who was waiting in an adjoining room, ready to take it to Constantinople. Not until 11 o'clock was I able to get away j from Berkeley square, and, leaving the aged statesman alone, deeply immersed in the puzzling applications tor advice of all sorts from her Majesty's representatives at the j various Courts of Europe, I drove back to Phillimore Gardens. \ On arrival home my first question of Juckes : was whether Ella was in the drawing room. J "No sir. Madam is out, sir." ! " Out ! When did she go out 1 " ' "About an hour after you had left, sir," replied the man. " Sbe has gone into the country, I believe." " Into the country I What makes you think so?" " Because she put on her travelling dress, and took two trunks with her," he answered. " Roberts, her maid, says she packed the boxes herself three days ago." " Did she say where she was going ? " I inquired breathlessly. " No, sir. She left no message with anyone." Entering the drawing room with my overcoat still on, I noticed lying upon her little rosewood escritoire a note addressed to me. Eagerly I took it up, tore it open, and read its contents. There were only a few hurriedly-Ecrawled words — a brief and formal farewell. " You cannot trust me," she wrote, " therefore we are best apart. Dj not attempt to follow me, for you cannot find me. Do not think ill of me, for even if I have wronged and deceived you I have nevertheless been your friend." It commenced formally, without any endearing terms, and concluded abruptly with the two words " Your wife." For a few moments I stood with it in my hand, staring at it in blank amazement. Then it occurred to me that in that very escritoire she kept all her correspondence, and it was more than probable tbat I might
learn the truth from some of the letters therein contained. I endeavoured to open it, but it was, as usual, locked. She had taken the key. In my sudden excitement I called to Juckes to bring a hammer, and with a few sharp blows broke open the sloping leather-covered top, finding a aumber of letters addressed in unfamiliar handwriting. One, larger than the rest, crumpled, dirty, and worn, as if it had reposed in someone's pocket for a long period, I took out and eagerly opened beneath the soft-shaded lamp. "My Godl" I cried aloud, scarcely able to believe my own eyes, when nest instant I, realised the terrible truth. "My God 1 I had never suspected this 1 " ( To be continued.')
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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/OW18970415.2.167
Bibliographic details
Otago Witness, Issue 2250, 15 April 1897, Page 41
Word Count
3,171Chapter XXII. To Err is Human. Otago Witness, Issue 2250, 15 April 1897, Page 41
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