A LADY'S LETTER FROM MELBOURNE.

Otago Witness, Issue 2105, 28 June 1894, Page 47

A LADY'S LETTER FROM MELBOURNE.

DBA.E Emmeline, — The subject of my letter this week will be the " Marriage Shop," an institution peculiar to Melbourne, I think. "Those whom God hath joined together let no man put asunder," are words solemn enough to make the boldest pause en the threshold of matrimony ere they take the step which can never be undone. But no 1 such words might never have been spoken for all the influence they have over the actions of a very large portion of the men and women of to-day. The age of superstition is past, the age of religion is passing, and the world is entering upon a period of agnosticism and lukewarm Christianity which shrugs its shoulders at what it disapproves and winks at what it cannot prevent. Aud the outcome of this Laodiceanism is a universal lowering Of the moral standard of right and wrong, an increase of self-indulgence, and a contempt for raligious institutions and restrictions of all kinds. Now and then the voice of one crying in the wilderness startles soe'ety from its slumber for a while, and a stray individual or so makes a resolve to look into things ; but tbe martyrs' blood has all been shed, and none of us are brave enough now to suffer for our principles, so the flash of the danger signal is disregarded, the word of warning passes unheeded, society slips back into its sensuous sleep, and the world wags on as usual.

In Australia the voice of the clergy, is crying to us to look into the marriage question. Not long ago a worthy judge in New South Wales, startled by the number of divorce casas, spoke seriously upon the lightness with which marriages are entered into in the colonies, and now the Rev. Stacey Chapman ij proclaiming from the pulpit against the immorality of auah places as tbe matrimonial bureau or "marriage shop." St. Paul tells us that " marriage bnould not ba taken in hand lightly . . . but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God, duly considering the causes for which matrimony was ordained." Yet here we see in almost every paper we take up advertisements of matrimonial bureaus wnicb, to "speak plaicly, are in many cases nothing more nor less than means for promoting the degradation of women. Even a newspaper like the

Melbourne Argus, itself a power in the land, lends its columns to such advertisements as these : —

Marriages solemnised any day or night by fully accredited minister of good standing — £1. Witnesses provided; no no -ice required. Strictest privacy. — H. Hanslow, jeweller, 307 Elizabeth street. Needy people free.

In a Melbourne evening journal we find " four gentlemen with good incomes desiring to make the acquaintance of four domesticated young ladies with a view to matrimony." As Df Chapman says, " This wholesale way [ot putting it should at once have aroused suspicion and disgust ; one would have thought that no woman who was not already lost to all sense of decency would for a moment have considered such a thing, and yet this advertisement brought 62 answers, 40 of them being from girls and women writing from the fashionable suburbs of Toorak, Hawthorn, Malvern, and St. Kilda 1 These answers, being from girls of fair education, were at once dismissed from consideration. No horsewhip could cut deep enough into the hides of these ruffians to satisfy me," cries Dr Chapman in righteous indignation. " The advertisers knew perfectly w<>ll what they were about, and had taken the measure of their victims accordingly." The reverend doctor does not say how the correspondence fell into his hands?, but he affirms that there was not a judge on the bench who would not swear to the genuineness of the letters. A strangely significant fact was that not one of the writers was a Roman Catholic, the most of them being either Presbyterians or members of the Church of England. " Could nothing be done for tbe writers of such letters as these?" asks Dr Chapman; "for," says he, "ie is really horrible, humiliating, and disgusting to see of what the ' modern girls,' the ' revolted daughters,' the 'girls up to date' have become capable." He goes on to urge that matrimonial advertisements should be made illegal, and that inquiries should be made with regard to the ordained clergymen who were advertised to celebrate marriages with the " stric test secrecy."

But the suppression of "marriage shops" and matrimonial advertisements, though it may mitigate an evil, will not stamp it out. That such things exist shows that there is a demand for them ; stop the demand and you strike the evil at its root. But how is this to be done ? Ah 1 there's the rub. It is the women themselves who are responsible for the evil. They are taught to look upon marriage as the end and aim of their existence. What wonder, then, that those whose chances of matrimony are meagre tbrow'pride, womanliness, and even modesty to the dogs, and rush into the armg of the first smooth-faced villain who sets himself to deceive them. Even such men as the murderer Deeming have no difficulty in finding wives.

" The girls of to-day hold themselves too cheap," was the careless remark of a gay young Lothario, whose experience of the fair sex was large. Unconsciously be revealed the secret cause of half the immorality of the age. Where is the dignity of girls who will answer marriage advertisements ? yet see how the " marriaga-shop9 " thrive. If the emancipation of women is to bring about a loss of self-respect, it were better that they had never been emancipated.

Trashy literature, no doubt, exerts a great deal of influence over the minds of such girls as those upon whose weakness the "marriage shops" thrive.) Idleness and lack of legitimate amusement are also aids to discontent and ultimate foliy; women whose minds are occupied and whose fingers are busy are not so apt to be foolish as those who have nothing to do but dream about lovers. If higher motives are wanting a congenial occupation will do more to keep a girl straight than all the good advice in the world, and a good education, the cultivation of a hobby, or a legitimate ambition, are better safeguards than stone walls or prison bars. Girls who are happy and contented do not yearn to be married. They are independent, natural, and charming, and always command respect ; but the girl who lowerß herself to be " all things to all men ' for the sake of marrying one of them, or who, in despair, seeks a husband at tbe " marriage shop," "deserves all she gets, which in nine cases out of ten is a heritage of degradation and misery. — Yours truly, Cigarette.

(X 3* (.Dcioriptloni of balli, *«., man be endaried by either be Witness oorroipon&em for the district or by the leareury to the ball jommittee. Tbe US. of an; oorreipoadenti who do not oamplj itth thti rale will be «mt to tbe learetur for endorsement pilot U appearing.— EMMELlNE.l •' > oQiare euuUoatlon la the terthoorulng luna lettera ahaald teton tbe Wltneu offloe If possible on Saturday night, but on no •ooount later tba,n Monday night. SOCIAL AT SHAG VALLEY. Dkar Emmeline, — A most pleasant social gathering of frieiuls from Shag Valley, Palmerston, Dunback, and Waihemo, in response to a cordial invitation from the Inch Valley School Committee, took place on the evening of June 22. It was a beautiful night, the schoolroom was nicely decorated, and refreshments were abundantly provided by the ladies of the district. Dancing was carried on with great spirit under the able management of Mr K. Clark, who kindly acted as JSJ.C, good music being supplied by Mr J. Philip. Songs, step-dancing, and other forms of amusement made the evening pass all too quickly for the young folk. So far as I can remember, the following were some of the dresses worn:— Misses Jpippie, black evening dresses; Miss Ross (Kartigi), dark dre.s.s ; Miss Gillespie, delaine bodice, black skirt; Miss Ross, brown with delaine bodice ; Miss Craig, steel grey with black satin ; Miss J. Craig, .steel grey with brown velvet ; Miss Davies, pink bodice, dark skirt ; Miss Murray, dark dress ; Miss Madams, light bodice, dark skirt, maroon sash ; Miss B. ltoss, pale blue ; Miss Todd, maroon bodice, dark skirt ; Miss S. Tqdd, checked tweed ; Miss M'Donald, maroon skirt, light bodice ; Miss M. M'Donald, dark dress ; MibS Munro, white jacket, dark skirt ; Miss Baggott, black and pink ; Miss Dalziel, print jacket, dark skirt ; Miss A. Dalziel, cardinal ; Miss Deem, delaine bodice, dark .skirt ; MihS M'Leu, silver grey ; Miss K. M'Leau, white and maroon ; Miss Scott (Merton), grey dress.— Pearl.