Won by a Scratch.

Otago Witness, Issue 2051, 15 June 1893, Page 50

Won by a Scratch.

" It was such a good joke on me," said the girl in the grey velvet toque to the girl in the blue velvet shoulder cape, as they stirred their hot chocolate, " that I must tell you. " You know how John has been proposing to me at regular intervals ever since he was out of knickerbockers. Well, he did it again the other night, and, with his usual fatality, cho3e an occasion when I was very cross. " He did it a little more awkwardly than usual, too, deliberately choosing the oldfashioned method of offering me * his hand and heart.'" , , , Here she paused tcr drink some chocolate, and the girl in blue asked breathlessly what she said. f . "Oh ! " remarked the other, in the tone of one relating an event of no importance, " I told him that I believed I was already provided with the full quota of bodily organs and tnat I wouldn't deprive him ! " "And what did he gay ? " ••Well, Belle, that's the funny thing. He seemed to brace up and said, politely, that at any rate there was no doubt about my having my full share of cheek ! And I was so delighted to find a man capable of even that much repartee on being rejected— that I accepted him."

As a doctor was showing some friends over a lunatic asylum, he drew their attention to a stately old woman wearing a paper crown. He explained that she imagined she was the Queen of England, and, thinking to amuse his visitors, he advanced towards her with a courtly bow and said : " Good morning, your Majesty."' Looking at him she scornfully uttered, " You're a fool, sir." The doctor was greatly astonished^ but totally collapsed when one young lady innocently remarked ; "Why, doctor, she was sane enough then." Needless to say the rest of the visitors were convulsed with laughter, but the young lady failed to see the point of her own remark.