SOCIAL TOPICS.

Otago Witness, Issue 1916, 6 November 1890, Page 38

SOCIAL TOPICS.

By Cisabettb.

"MRS GRUNDY."

" What will Mrs Grundy say ? " This is a question we have all been asked, and sometimes we have answered, "Who cares what she says 1 " or " Bother Mrs Grundy ; " but deep down in our" hearts we all have a certain respect for her opinion, and whether we acknowledge it or not she certainly influences our behaviour more than we would care to confess.

For she is a terrible woman that Mrs Grundy, with a dreadful faculty for saying unpleasant things ; therefore, if we are wise, we shall propitiate her, without being governed by her. In England Mra Grundy's opinion carries great weight, in the colonies she has not as yet obtained a very firm footing, while in America she is treated with contempt.

How shall we describe her without offending her, tor she is very easily offended ? Bhe reads the newspapers with avidity, and if she finds anything in them calculated to shock the sensibilities of the British matron, she overwhelms the long-suffering editors with columns of correspondence. She looks after the morals of the English people (for she is " Quite English, you know "). She it is who regulates the class of plays which shall be acted on English stages, and the class of novels which shall ornament English book-shelves, and if she had her own way she would drape nude statues, and cover " Phyrne " with a waterproof cloak, for she is full of matrimonial prejudices, and incapable of understanding that "Unto the pure alj things are pure." She is the personification of propriety, the embodiment of conventionality, and often, alasl the essence of uncharitableness, But she is like the dust cart, a necessary evil, and though we have no affection for her she helps to keep our moral atmosphere clean. We are all naturally so wicked (at any rate our clergy are always telling us so, and they ought to know) that we require some soaial .policeman to keep us in order, and Mrs Grundy fulfils that office. She is a sort of female detective always at our elbow, making remarks on our conduct and checking us when we are inclined to be indiscreet. If we set her at nought we may expect social ostracism, we may be dubbed " eccentric." " Bohemian," or even " fast." Morris says : "It is seldom worth while to wage war against conventionality," and he is right let us give in in little things, so long as we are not altogether ruled by conventionality ; for women have to avoid being talked about, and if they defy Mrs Grundy their names will be public property. No doubt picnics, dances, and boating parties would be much nicer without chaperones, but then " What would Mrs Grundy say ? " and no doubt the space occupied by those objectionable people known as "gooseberries ; " would be much more appreciated than their company ; but again, What would Mrs Grundy say 1 People of congenial tastes, whether of the same sex or not, enjoy each other's conversation and delight in each other's society, but should these kindred spirits be male and female, in steps Mrs Grundy and asks, " What is the meaning of this flirtation ? " It is no use to suggest " Platonic affection " in reply ; it is as bad as shaking a red rag at a bull. The very name of Platonic affection starts Mrs G. off in a tirade on the frailty of human nature, the wickedness of mankind, and the degenerate state of the human heart, which she affirms is perfectly incapable of anything but carnal love. Poor old Mrs Grundy, she is utterly lacking in that rare virtue, " charity that thinketh no evil."

Therefore we will not be ruled entirely by her. She will try to settle for us whom we shall visit and whom we shall decline to receive. This is a point we should settle for ourselves. She is also very particular about the observance of the Sabbath, and keeps account of our attendance at church. This is a matter for own conscience, but in all the minor details of social life which come under Mrs Grundy's dominion we can safely be guided by her opinion, such as the wearing of gloves and dress coats on certain occasions, the mysteries of card leaving, the question of the advisability of ladies riding unattended, the regulation number of dances with one partner, the propriety of public kisses, the wording of invitations, and all the numerous trifles which are strictly within Mrs Grundy's province ; always remembering that where the heart is concerned we ourselves are the best judges of our conduct, and that we need never be afraid of outraging conventionality if we will but practise always what Shakespeare says : " To thine own self be true, and it must follow, thou canst not then be false to any man."

— Jonnthnn yon Lutz, the Bavarian statesman, is dead.

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