ALICE'S LETTER TO HER READERS.

Otago Witness, Issue 1917, 17 August 1888, Page 33

ALICE'S LETTER TO HER READERS.

The weather has been so dismal this week that there have been very few nice gowns about, and no concerts or balls, so consequently there are no dresses to describe. Before 1 close the letter I may have a little to say about the Naval ball ; with that exception there are no amusements to tell of. Ain't you glad I—l1 — I mean my gentlemen readers ; I think I am, also. One gets tired of going out, and a whole week with uninterrupted evenings around the fire this weather is a very acceptable " rest by the way." It sounds nice reading the account of festivities in the paper, but in the report there is no tearing oneself away from a good fire and hurrying to catch a tram; no muddy puddles and cold feet and nasty draughts. A lady correspondent says this week, " It must be jolly going everywhere." It is ; but then one doesn't always feel in a jolly mood. A nice book and lire sometimes seem more inviting than anything in the wide world. I was going along the other evening at about 5 o'clock ; the street lamps were dimly shining through a fog, it was misty and dreary — a thoroughly wintry evening— the KtreoLs only made inviting by the tinkle of the tram bells and the glow from the lighted windows, when a man hurrying home from work remarked to a little girl -by his side as he passed : — " I hope your mother has got a good fire on." I looked at thepoor fellow, weary and toil-stained, and pictured him since eight in the morning working, possibly in the drizzling rain, or in some cold, dreary shop, and hoped heartily there mas a " good fire on." Many wives can scarcely believe what an effect a good fire has upon the husbands' temper for the whole evening — perhaps being in doors all day it does not occur to her — and in sheer thoughtlessness she forgets it. The husband comes home tired and depressed — he has only eaten the cold lunch he took with him in the morning, — and the smouldering ashes in the grate, and the uninviting tea set before him, make him feel that life is scarcely worth living. His poverty is borne in upon him with double force, and if he leaves the uninviting home for an evening to seek* necessary recreation elsewhere, who is to blame ? On the other hand, that bright fire and warm meal woik wonders. The cold weary body is warmed, refreshed and strengthened ; the nervous system is built up again, and as the workingman 'stretches out his rough palms before the fire, the leaping cheerful blaze seems to soften and warm his heait as well, and as he looks round the clean room his voice grows gentle as he speaks to wife and children, for his poverty is not so obtrusive, and his labour is not without its rest and hours of recreation. He feels, too, that his wife identifies herself with him, and by preparing that cheerful welcome she has given him to understand that she knows he is working for her and the children all the day, and will come home tired. So I hope there was " a good fire on " for the workiugman in question. In many homes there was, for the leaping blaze was visible through many windows, or was reflected through the blind. The influence that home evenings have upon the well-being of men and women, boys and girls, is very great. Young folks especially will have recreation — must have it. It is all very well for stern fathers and -mothers to say they shall not. It is like fastening down the hatchways of a ship and ignoring the fact that there is a fire burning down in the hold. By and bye the smoke will begin to push up through the crevices, and as soon as the air gets in the flames will leap up. Human nature will remain human nature under all the suppression laid upon it, and it is natural for young folks to desire and need a certain amount of recreation ; and have it they will. If fathers and mothers will not provide innocent amusement for the young, as soon as they get the chance they will take any amusement, no matter what kind so long as it is a diversion — something to break the monotony of a dull existence. Keeping him altogether away from temptation is not strengthening a lad to resist temptation. Moral strength is displayed in the fact that temptation can be met and mastered. Instil sound principles, inculcate high thoughts and pure tastes, and give the lad a certain amount of scope to decide and judge for himself. If you never give the young any scope to please themselves how are you going to know which way their inclinations run 1 — whether when left free they will turn to the noble or the ignoble ? It is a well-known fact that the youths who have- been kept

under the strictest "discipline have often when set free turned out the wildest scamps. The evening, it seems to me, should always be set apart for rest and refreshment of body and mind. Some housekeepers have always got something on hand in the evening — the children to bath, some ironing to do, some clothes to air in front of the firesomething or other to keep up a fidget and fuss about half the evening. With a little management (unless there is sickness in the house), this can almost always be avoided. The cheerful intercourse, the music, the reading— each after his own idea— does much towards building up hope and courage for the next day's work. There is a saying that a man can be judged more by his friends than by his relations, because his relations are thrust upon, him, while he chooses his friends himself. If this is so — and we know it is — a man can be better judged by his amusements than by his occupation. The character of his employment has often been decided by guardians, or circumstances ; his hours of leisure, if left alone to his own free will, will soon discover the bent of his mind. Even in lodgings some will turn their rooms into little nests of intellectual pleasures ; others, even in a house appointed with all the elegance and luxurious quiet of a palace, will find nothing to interest them like they will in a bar parlour. That reminds me that a lady correspondent asked me several weeks ago, " Ought I to feel neglected because my husband pores over his books every evening ? .He does not leave me alone, but he is so fond of reading that I get vexed." I must apologise for not replying before; but some weeks there is not room to answer at length. Nc; certainly you should not feel neglected. Very possibly your husband feels very lonely, for from the latter half of your letter I can glean you are not --very fond of books. Perhaps before he was married your husband had some gentleman friend with whom he used to read and converse, and interchange ideas on all they read. If so you will scarcely realise how much he will miss such intellectual pleasure, and it is saying much for him that he does not seek it now. If you are. wise you also will try to cultivate his tastes, in order to become more fitted as a companion to him. During the day read what lie is reading, and try to get him to talk about it in the evening. There arc some men who never will talk about the fashions and the news of the day. They don't care a button whether Mrs Jones has had a new dress for the last six years or not, or whether Miss Brown is engaged to Mr Johnson or the minister ; and strange to say, these are the men who generally marry I some pretty girl who takes an intense'interest in every small sensation under the sun. If she does not endeavour to become interested in her husband's pursuits they will both be very lonely. You will find on going to the house a pleasant chatty wife who is most hospitable, and entreats you " not to go yet," so glad is she to have someone to talk to ; and a husband kind but quiet, who listens with a half-smile and a preoccupied expression of the eyes till some chance word catches his ears. Then he becomes animated and eloquent, finding that his world is not un known to his guest also ; and as book men and women come forward the wife grows silent — partly interested, partly bored. Boys are never at a loss for amusement. Turn a boy into the streets and he will thrive where a girl will shiver in the cold, with her arms tucked under her apron. The latest game I have noticed was a boy playing at crossing sweeper. He had got his mother's American broom, and had swept a clean path through the mud, over which boys and girls passed and repassed — mimic ladies and gentlemen. The average boy of 10 years of age scorns lollies. Give him a cigarette and he is happy. The airs he assumes ! He will scarcely speak to his bosom companions ; he leans in a careless attitude against a shop window, while the other boys ! stand round in various attitudes of admiration — thinking what a fine fellow the possessor of the cigarette is. A gentleman to!d me the other day that while he was in a tobacconist's three little boys, averaging from eight to 10 years, came in, and one, depositing a sixpence on the counter, demanded "Three cigarettes, please." It is quite time for you men to leave off smoking. What can be accomplished by a boy of 10 is beneath the dignity of a man to indulge in. We shall have groups of little boys passing round the snuff box next, and askiug one another to take a pinch. Both the University and the Navai Brigade balls on Friday evening were a great success. The University ball was held in the Choral Hall and every arrangement had been made for the comfort and pleasure of the guest?, of whom there were a goodly number. There were a number of pretty dresses worn which were much admired. At the Gauison Hall tha Navals also enjoyed themselves thoroughly. The hall was tastefully decorated, the supper excellent, the music good, and everyone seemed delighted. A correspondent kindly sends me the fol-lowing-note on the hair, by Professor Kirk, of Edinburgh, which may interest and help many :—: — There is a variety of forms in which a diseased coming-uff of the hairs of the hea 1 appeals. For example, it occurs in persons that are jet very young We know several about eight and 10 years of age iv whom the hair is coming off bodily, and threatening to leave them quite bald though they are so young. Among these is at least one from whose head all the natural nice hair is coming off, and a perfectly white hair is showing in its stead. Then there are grown-up persons whose hair is coming off in a more gradual way, and without any growth promising to replace it. Among these are persons whose hair is becoming prematurely white, who are as grey-headed at 30 as the usual run of people of this country would be at 60. Then there are those whose hair does not come off from the roots, but breaks off when 3in or so long. All these forms of failure in head hair lead us to consider simply the state of the skin of the head from which the hair grows. If we can restore health to that we can meet all cases we have named, and any similar ones that may arise. First of all, we may take up the failing colour of the hair. Careful observation shows that this comes and goes. The colouring matter, whatever ifc may be, is sent along the tubes of the hair in full supply at one time and in a much more stinted supply at another. When the case is taken rightly in hand, before the glands supplying the colouring substance have failed 1 altogether, hair that has been getting white "re- i

covers its colour. .We have seen this ■ very strongly in some persons who got good treatment Boon after the hair had begun to get grey. We have seen it in some cases even after a long time of greyness. Just as the skin and its colouriug glands bad become more healthy, the colour passed along hairs that had got white, and then younger appearance returned. Then we have something very similar when ifc is not the colouring matter which is concerned but the sheaths of the hair itstlf that has not sufficient .supply of the substance from which it is formed. When it grows to a length of 3iu or 4in and then breaks off, the skin is failing to supply this substance. . It is to this failure in the skin that we must direct our remedy. Then the same truth comes to us when the hair is coming off gradually and the comb is habitually full of ifc. It is the glands that supply certain hairs that are failing, though they are nob all failing at once. We must hero address ourselves again to the skin of the bead. So must it be when the whole hair is coming off in handfuls. It is only the skin more rapidly and completely which is throwing off all the hairs together. It is this that must be cured. Then comes the important question as to THE JREMEDY. We have found nothing so good as careful rubbing with weak acetic acid, and finishing with really good olive oil. If the acid is used too strong evil will be done rather than good, because the skin is then burned and shrivelled. But there is no need for such a blunder as this. The arid must be diluted till it raises only a comfortable feeling in the skin of the head. Then ifc must be carefully rubbed into the skin for a length of time long enough to have this comfortable feeling caused. When this has been fairly secured, and the head drier), a little good olive oil is rubbed in so as to keep all warm, and the head should then have a nice covering, so that the glands that have bean stimulated wit > the acid may be nursed into new life and better action. This treatment should be given at least once a day. Ifc will not be long in showing its •power. We speak from knowing a good many cases of perfect cure now. There could scarcely be any remedy more cheap or more easily procured. A correspondent sends me the following description of a wedding at Kyeburn :—: — A pleasant festive gathering took place at Mr Maisey's Kyeburu Hotel, ou Wednesday, the Ist inst , on the occasion of the marriage of Mis 3 Annie Shepard to Mr Andrew Patterson. The marriage ceremony took place at about 12 o'clock, when the happy pair were joined in wedlock by the Rev. J. M'Oosh Smith, of Naseby. The brkle was given away by Mr Maisey, and looked rt;a!ly charming in a grey basket canvas cloth with silver flowers, trimmed with broche to match; long tulle veil looped up with pearls and orange blossoms. Miss Oreighton, one of the bridesmaids, wore pale blue nun's veiling with panel of cream lace. Miss Crutchley, the other bridesmaid, wore pale blue cashmere, trirnm«l with satin to match, and white lace flowers with blue ribbons. After the ceremony was over \ha bridal party (comprising over 59 guests) sat down to a sumptuous breakfast provided by the host and hostess of the Kyeburn Hotel. During the evening some excellent vocal and instrumental music wag contributed by several of the young ladies and gentlemen present, and the celebration wound Up about daybreak, with three cheers for the bride and bridegroom, and for the host and hostess. I will give you a description of some of th" dresses worn on the occasion. Miss Annetfc, fawn nun's %'ciling trimmed with old gold and pale bine ribbons ; Miss E. Annetfc, pale blue sateen trimmed with cardinal satin ; Miss Douglas, black cashmere embroidered with jet, white vest and white roses; Miss Annie Douglas, black cashmere embroidered with jet, Stuart tartan vest and cream lace ; Miss Schriek, dark fawn trimmed with liberty cardinal silk ; Miss Harris, black cashmere, white vest and old gold ribbons ; Miss Emily Harris, black cashmere, broche to match ; Miss Dowling, stone colour and broche to match ; Mrs Dowling, black cashmere trimmed with black velvet ; Miss Finepey, cardinal velvet ; Miss Patterson, slate-coloured nun's veiling, plush vesb and lavender ribbons; Miss Bayley, navy blue cashmere, satin to match ; Miss Jessie Bayley, black cashmere, cardinal plush front and ribbons ; Mrs S. Inder, ruby cashmere, jefc panel and vest ; Mrs Pollock, old gold canvas cloth, trimmed with crimson plush ; Mrs Patterson (mother of the bridegroom), brown clcth dress relieved with brown velvet; Mrs A. M. Patterson, black rashmere with j velvet ; Mrs Doughs, Mack cashmere, old goM [ ribbons and Limerick lace ; Mrs Pearson, black nun's veiling and white lace.