PASSING NOTES.,

Otago Witness, Issue 1813, 20 August 1886, Page 21

PASSING NOTES.,

Unless the question pending in the City Council is the impeachment or attainder of John Barnes, one hardly sees to what end the portentous proceedings of the past week are tending. We have now three voluminous reports on the causes, occult and visible, of the Dowling street accident. The chairmen of committees have reported, the city surveyor has reported, his Worship the Mayor has reported. The three reports have been printed, by order, in the city newspapers, at the public cost-*-good for the city newspapers, but not so good, one would think, for the citizens ! Cvi bono ? This municipal memorandumiad, making confusion worse confounded, whither does it all tend? Is anybody going to be 1 hanged? On that inducement the public might perhaps be moved to wade through these incrimatory and recriminatory outpourings— not even omitting that of John Barnes, which, judged by a cursory glance, seems, by its numbered verse divisions and Old Testament style, to resemble a copious extract from the Chronicles of Gotham. Boiled down, these reports may be compressed into three sentences. The city surveyor says, "It wasn't me ! " the mayor says, "It wasn't me ! " and the chairmen of committees say, " It wasn't we ! " Let them toss up for it, then— the loser to have his choice between being hanged from the clock tower and being required to fill up the Dowling street cutting at his own expense. The session is over, and terminated in a flourish of backhanded compliments. There was, as is the custom, a debate about nothing, and every hon. member expressed gleefully his candid opinion aboub things in general. Major Atkinson thought that the Government had "sold their birthright for a. mess of pottage " and had been a party to sundry "conspiracies." Mr Moss was generally severe upon Sir R. Stout, and stated roundly that he had " yet his spurs to win." The Treasurer spoke discursively too discursively, most of his friends will think — and complained principally of the efforts that had been made to seduce his chicf — our own Sir Robert — from his side. Mr Wakefield, impetuous as ever, rose to the occasion with the remark that Sir J. Vogel had " talked the most arrant nonsense," that he -was "an alien " and had behaved as such, that he had " sunk to the the lowest position any Minister had ever held in that House"; and that the Premier was a statesman "with drawbacks." Mr Bryce was milder. He merely thoughfthe Premier " peculiar," and opined that " the Government should sink down on their knees and apologise for the session in sackcloth and ashes." To this indictment the Premier has replied by putting up the shutters and leaving the cud of the matter to be chewed by constituencies during .the recess. That they will not "chew up" the Government in the operation is his prayer — and ours of course. Nothing too havd can be said of the weather we have been enduring for the last few days, but not even a week's wet north-easter can reconcile one to hearing our climate accused unjustly. The following sentence is from an article in the London Spectator :— There are hundreds of books about New

Zealand, but just show us a passage in one of them mentioning that the first speciality of New Zealand is viind— an endless, remorseless, persistent blowing of air from the Pacific, which even residents never cease to notice, and which to new comers occasionally makes life almost Unendurable. This sentence occurs in an article lamenting that books of travel are not sufficiently " impressionist" — in other words, do not convey to English readers the first impressions felt by a visitor. The first and last " impression " of visitor or resident in New Zealand, it seems, is wind — "an endless, remorseless, persistent blowing" which "makes life almost unendurable." In charity to the editor we must suppose either that "New Zealand" is a misprint x for " Patagonia," or that he has read something about themeteorological peculiarities of Wellington and supposes Wellington to be synonymous with New Zealand. If neither supposition is admissible, then we must fall back on the general fact that the world — the newspaper world in particular — is sadly given to lee- in'. There is, however, one other possibility — perhaps what is running in the editorial mind is some confused reminiscence of Anthony Trollope's satire about the colonial tendency to "blow." It would not be thefir^t time that a myth has grown out of a figure of speech. Even the present " bad snap," to use an Americanism, may be extenuated if not justified. Man being by constitution a discontented animal, is prone to grumble at his lot under all and any circumstances. Thus, as there is no serious grievance in the air save the tardy approach of quarter day, I am overwhelmed this week by complaints about the weather. To repeat once more a very threadbare remark, I did not manufacture this weather, and if I did, could not have improved upon the present article. " The ' rain it raineth every day " sighs one correspondent. What would the man have ? It cannot rain more often than every day and all day, and under the present atmospherical conditions it cannot rain less often. So much I can clearly perceive without the least assistance from Captain Edwin or any other professional meteorologist. Therefore, why not bo content ? Life in Dunedin during the past week or fortnight has to the rightminded been full of pleasurable | occupatien and exaitemenfc. Most men have been compelled to put in some few hours a day in merely alternating their apparel, and at every necessary ceremony of this kind they should have been filled with increased thankfulness that Providence had supplied them with changes of raiment— three, six, a dozen, or whatever number they might need, per diem. Then, is not the promenade full of unusual interest this weather ? The wind may for the moment be straight ahead or on the quarter, but no man can predict with certainty the direction from which it will take him at the next street corner, nor how his umbrella may be pleased to behave at the critical juncture. He mutters a brief petition, and dashes round. He may weather the blast and he may not, but at anyrate all the finest qualities of his nature will be put sharply to the test and get exercise, which perhaps they need. There is further, speculation as to whether he will or will not be able to ford the next gutter, swollen to a roaring torrent, to say nothing of the supreme query as to whether the basement at home will or will not be flooded, and the maids in hysterics. This weather, you may depend, is considerately sent to provide us with a topic of interest in view of the imminent close of the Parliamentary session. That musical pre-Raphaelite— that apostle of the rennaisance in poatry — Mr Algernon C. Swinburne, appears to have been handling Mr Gladstone entirely without gloves, as is the way with men of rhyme when they grow thoroughly angry. " See," says Mr Swinburne, " the long tongue lick the dripping hand tl at smokes and reeks of slaughter." This is certainly vivid and pictorial, and must have been the reverse of soothing to the great Liberal leader. Quite needless to ask who was the possessor of the long tongue that servilely licked the reeking hand of the Irish assassin. Mr Swinburne's chief quarrel with Mr Gladstone throughout is on account of the length of his tongue. He is a " man of words," an " old man eloquent," a v tonguester." The poet's second complaint against the ex-premier is that he has neglected to become " extinct " long ago, and that when he has talked of retirement it was invariably to the accompaniment of a wink. " Many a year," says Algernon C. S., with natural indignation, Many a year that priceless light of life has trembled, we remember, On the platform of extinction— unextinct ; Many a month has been for him the long year's last —life's calm December. Can it be that he who said so, saying so, winked? It is possible that he did, and the Gladstonian wiak must have been gall and wormwood to his opponents, who were hungering that this "priceless light of life" should be snuffed out, in order that they might take office. Mr Swinburne's lines are splendid, as is usually the case, and their ferocity really matters less than appears at first sight. If Mr Gladstone's friends are shocked at the poet's denunciation of their idol, they must remember that to shock people is part of this poet's mission, and that he is the same man who, a few years ago, discoursed as follows : — " They cry out, thine elect, thine aspirants to heavenward, whose faith is as a flame ; 0, thou, the Lord God of our tyrants, they call thee their God by thy name, By thy name that in hell-fire was written, and burned at the point of thy sword, Thou art smitten, thou God, thou arb smitten; thy death is upon thee, O Lord. And th°. love-song of earth, as thou dieafc, resounds through fcha wind of her wiugs — ' Glory to Man in thehighest ! for Man is the master of things.'" Cjmpared with this merciless raillery directed at something held by men more sacred than even the name of Gladstone, it will be seen that Mr Swinburne's latest effort is mild. He was in good humour at the time, and merely dealt W. E. G. a friendly smack in passing, saying more n sorrow than in anger, " Why d<?n't you shut

your mouth ? and why, by all that's perplexing, don't you die ?" A correspondent sends me the following :— DearC, — A friend of mine who thinks he knows and possibly does know something about music, discharged into my ears the other evening a jeremiad over the low state of the divine art in this city. His lament, as nearly as I can reproduce it, ran as follows :—: — "We care nothing about music, really, in Dunedin. Witness the history of our musical societies." The conductor of one of them has just been sued for £40 odd, cost of music and hire of piano, and has been left by the members to pay it. Not long before, he was sued_ for a big advertising account. The other society is in straits, and hovers perpetually on the verge of insolvency. A community in which musical societies cannot live cares nothing for music, since to get good music you must have societies. Amateurs must combine, co-operate, clubbing together their several mites of knowledge and talent, and by working together educate themselves and each other. Personal vanity is the ruin of our musical societies. At every concert of the • Choral ' places must be found for a dozen or more of solo singers. To suit the capacity of these ambitious members the society is kept occupied with light • cantatas,' the musical merit of which is little above that of a ' service of song.' The great oratorios are neglected. Once a year we have the ' Messiah.' When shall we hear a symphony of Beethoven's or Haydn's ? Never, in Dunedin. Our instrumentalists won't combine to form an orchestral society which might attack the great works of the great masters. Jealousy and vanity split them into coteries ; they prefer to shine at 'smoke concerts' and in string quartettes. It is melancholy to see two or three hundred intelligent people going to a concert of chamber music every alternate Saturday afternoon, in the full belief that they are thereby showing their sympathy with art. Chamber music at the best is always mediocre art. They hear one or two good piano solos and three or four string quartettes. Unless the pertormers are consummate artists— which ours are not—^a succession of three or four string quartettes is a case for the police. After listening to 20 minutes of string quartetting, I defy any man to tell one movement from another. Their squeaking, scraping, and fizzing suggests cats — cats, sir, nothing less — a contest of enraged toms and tabbies. By way of variety you have a 'cello solo. Only a very great artist can get solo music out of a 'cello. The performance rem inds me of Dr Johnson's saying about a dog's walking upon his hind legs. The wonder is not that he does it well, but that he does it at all. No, sir : music is pretty nearly dead in Dunedin. At the rate we are going we shall soon be capable of nothing higher than church choirs, volunteer bands, and ' smoke concerts ' — worst bathos of all ! » This is a veritable jeremiad, whether justified or not by the facts my knowledge of art hardly enables me to say. If the writer will send his name and address I will forward it to Messrs Scherek and Barth, who would probably like to have a word or two with him. There were high jinks at the Carnival on Saturday night. " Civis " appeared there in his own person, ascended the platform amidst thunderous applause, and made a speech. No authentic account of this unprecedented event having been published, though many erroneous rumours are abroad, I shall here set down exactly what occurred. Having on previous evenings pretty well explored all the other follies of the Carnival, on Saturday I ventured into the cave of the sorceress Caterwaula. That's where I made the mistake. No sooner had that gifted woman grabbed my shilling than she uttered a shriek which rang through the building from skylight to cellar. "You are 'Civis'!" she exclaimed — "you are, you are!" flinging herself upon my neck and holding me tight. Alarmed at her cries, a number of lords-in-waiting rushed in, followed by Alfred the Great, William the Norman, Robinson the dentist, and several Plantagenets. Concealment was hopeless. My long-preserved incognito had been penetrated at last, and I resigned myself to be hoisted shoulder-high and carried into the presence of the Queen, seated in state on the platform, surrounded by her maids of honour, her beef-eaters, and her Leicester — an imposing group! Having been informed who I was, her majesty was with | difficulty restrained from prostrating herself !at my feet and clasping my knees. "This is too much happiness!" she exclaimed, — "But why, oh why, illustrious ' Civis,' didst thou write of the youths who flock to these our revels that they were 'young donkeys'?" " Madam," said I, " the term ' young donkeys ' seemed preferable to ' young asses ' | as being the softer, but at your gracious bidding it shall be changed, I will make it 'wild asses,' which is scriptural." "Nay, prithee," interposed the Queen, "it shall stay as it is. The words of ' Oivis " cannot be mended. Quod servpsit, scripsit." [Queen Bess I was pleased to note, had not forgotten her Latin.] " But, good ' Civis,' " she continued, " speak to the multitude, whose impatience will not much longer be restrained." Turning then to the crowd, and hushing them into silence by a wave of my hand, I spake much as follows : " Good people, we have come hither night after night, at much personal expense, drawn by an irresistible desire to revive our fading recollections of Mangnall's Historical Questions. (Tumultuous applause.) Before our eyes has passed the long and glorious pageant of English royalty. (Frantic cheering.; We have seen Queen Elizabeth, with sublime superiority to chronology, succeeding her own successors and receiving at her court James 1., Charles 1., and Charles 11. (delirious cheering). We have seen her exchanging court bows with her own decapitated mother; we have seen Henry VIII. — touching example of domestic felicity ! — marching into the presence attendedby his six wives, like a Presbyterian elder going to kirk at the head of his family on a fast day. We have seen the crowned heads of ten centuries threading the mazes of a Scotch reel, Edward the Confessor kickingup his heels with Catherine of Arragon, and Bloody Mary jigging it with Billy the Norman. We have also seen these ladies of the Elizabethan court, who are as good as they are beautiful — (You darling ! from several maids of honour) — sacrificing their valuable time at the call of charity and religion to sell nosegays and pin them on the breasts of young " But here the constantly growing applause

! became a continuous roar, and the sentence was never, finished. Thereupon, preparing to take my leave, I turned to the queen, fell on one knee, squaring the other into a seat in the manner of a bottle-holder at a prize fight, and extended my arms as if to embrace the whole assembled court. Then a strange thing happened. Magnetised by my appealing attitude, one of the maids of honour sprang forward, slid down upon my extended knee, and flung her arms about my neck. Rising with my lovely burden, I perceived her eyes half close, her head fall back ;— I bent forward, and " Oh !" said the maid of honour, as if she had felt an electric Bhock. Another ! " Ah !" she gasped, shutting her eyes again in sweet resignation. Yet another ! " He — he — he !" laughed the maid of honour, beginning to get slightly hysterical. Gently, but firmly, I was detaching her willowy arms, which held me like the tentacles of an octopus, when she started with renewed animation : " Just one more," said the maid of honour. And we one more'd ! Then I handed her to Leicester, who frowned officially but said nothing. He seemed taken by surprise. Nothing now remained but to submit myself to the embraces of the mob, whose excitement was growing dangerous. Thrice was I carried in triumph round the hall, and then, under pretext of wishing to make another speech, I got them to set me down on the counter of the refreshment stall. Once free, I sprang across the counter, upsetting in my passage a tray of sandwiches, three waitresses, and the coffee urn ; in another moment I had gained the door and made good my escape. [N.B. — This account may be regarded as strictly true in every particular. All others are to be rejected.] .

Parliament wasproroguedon Wednesday afternoon, and most members of the Legislature .have now left Wellington. The Southern members left in the Penguin in the afternoon. The Hinemoa went North with the Tarauaki and Auckland members; and the Stella took those hailing from Marlborough. A slight attempt was made to transact some business in the House, and Mr Macandrew moved his resolutions regarding the settlement of the land. The Premier was replying to Mr Macandrew's speech, when the members were summoned to the Legislative Council, and business was at 1 an end. Parliament has been prorogued till December 12. At the meeting of the Dunedin Hospital Board on Wednesday some discussion took place upon cases, which were stated to be of frequent occurrence, in which indigent patients presented themselves for admission after having paid all their money away to a medical man for treatment outside the hospital. It was suggested that in order to put a stop to this patients should be required, upon admission to the institntion, to state in writing the name of the doctor in whose hands they have been and the amount of fees paid to him. The matter was relegated to the House Committee. During the four years of its active existence in Australia the Salvation Army has established 200 recognised stations, which are in charge of about 400 officers. Between 11,000 and 12,000 soldiers are in regular service, and it is estimated that the aggregate attendance at all the barracks on Sundays does not fall far short of 100,000. The War Cry, the official organ of the army, has a colonial circulation of 80,000 copies weekly. A terrible elephant story comes from India. It appears that on the morning of the Bth of April last, while an elephant was being ridden by its keeper in the district of Sultanpore, in Oude, the animal resented " prodding " with a spear by pulling the man from his back and throwing him some distance away. Fortunately the man fell in a hollow and remained there undiscovered by the elephant, who went to a neighbouring village. There he chased an old man into a house, then broke dbwn the walls, pulled the man out, and dashed him to pieces. The same night the elephant knocked down several houses in quest of human beings in the villages of Sadarpur, Bargaon, and Jaisingpur. He killed six men in Bersoma, three in Sota, four in Gangeo, and four in Mardan. He likewise killed a bullock and a pony, and also completely destroyed a new carriage. The animal used to stand at the door of a house, force his entry by demolishing the walls on either side, and would then kill as many of the inmates as he could, pursuing others who tried to run away. \He mangled the corpses terribly. After securing a victim he sometimes returned to the spot to see if life was extinpt, and would commence mutilating the body afresh. He carried several bodies long distances, and threw them into ravines, &c. The elephant found his way to the Dehra Rajah's place, where he tried to enter the house of a gardener ; but some men, mounted on three elephants, assisted by spearsmen, drove him off* He then returned to Bebipur, where he tried to break down his master's house, in whioh several persons had taken refuge. The police got into the house from a back window, and were obliged to send for help to the Dehra Rajah, who sent three elephants and some spearsmen. The animal received two gunshots on the head at Bebipur; which, however, only temporarily drove him off. He was ultimately captured, at imminent risk, by the Rajah's three elephants and men. Commenting on what is known as the district railways scandal in New Zealand, the Melbourne Argus remarks :—": — " While direct bribery would be scouted in every colony, there may be more insidious forms of corruption, and it is the duty of Parliament to stop the first appearance of them. A feeling of uneasiness is almost unavoidable at the low tone which has been openly professed by well-known colonial politicians. Their ideas are the very reverse of those which have gained ground in England. Since the Dundas case and the expulsion of Lord Cochrane, the House of ComCommons has had to deal with no such scandals. But some Australian politicians seem less careful to avoid the appearance of evil. The New Zealand affair does not stand alone, for in New South Wales the atmosphere reeks with scandal. It is impossible on any grounds to justify this union of public and private business in the same hands. A magistrate does not sit in judgment on a case in which he is interested, and a similar rule is wisely applied to politicians, Mr Steward in New Zealand and %v Wright in New South

Wales may both have been perfectly guiltless, but they placed themselves in a false position, and such precedents would become calamitous.' One by one (says the Tuapeka,Times) the old identities of Tuapeka are gradually passing away. Mr Joseph Bailey, for many years well known on the goldfield, and latterly a resident of Tuapeka Mouth, died at the hospital last week after a brief illness. Deceased was over 62 years of age, and had been in declining health for some time past. — Mr Thomas Brunton, another Tuapeka pioneer, passed over to the majority on Monday morning, at his residence in Coloiisay street. He came to Lawrence when the goldfield first broke out, and was 64 years of age when he died. The Wellington correspondent of the Tuapeka Times states that owing to the absence of several goldfields members, who, to make sure of their berths, were on board the Wairarapa on their way South, the items, £4000 for testing the beds of the Molyneux and Mataura rivers and £450 towards the purchase and erection cf improved machinery at Blue Spuri which had been placed on the Supplementary Estimates, were struck out in Committee on the casting vote of the chairman. Had they not been in such a hurry these votes would have passed. The following particulars are given of the cruise of the German warship Albatross amongst the islands of the Pacific : — She first visited the New Hebrides, where she punished the natives of the island of Lenure for the murder of a German trader named Klein and his companion, Peter Cullen, an Englishman. She opened fire upon and killed 10 natives at one place, but failed to find anyone at another village. She burnt the village, destroyed the plantations, and secured the arms, including rifles. She found the clothing and furniture belonging to the murdered men in the village. The Albatross then proceeded to Pentecost Island, where the mate of the German vessel Upolo had been murdered three months previously. She opened fire with heavy guns, Gatliugs, and rifles* on the natives, who were grouped on the beach, and did terrible execution among them. She then landed a party and destroyed the village, and afterwards informed the natives at Port Sandwich what had been done and the reason for it. She went on to Matupi, New Britain, where she found a splendid harbour in the neighbourhood of Cape Palliser. She then went to the Caroline Islands, where she took down the German flag, which had been previously hoisted in several places. A London telegram to the Melbourne Argus announces that the loan of 600,000,000fr (£25,000,000) required by M. de Lesseps and the Panama Canal Company for the completion of the Panama Canal has been fully subscribed. The French Government only authorised this loan on the report of the special commission that the 600,000,p00fr to be furnished by the loan will be sufficient to carry the works to such an advanced stage as to leave no doubt' as to the final success of the enterprise, which will be then near at hand.