NOTES FROM THE SEAT OF GOVERNMENT.

Otago Witness, Issue 1813, 20 August 1886, Page 29

NOTES FROM THE SEAT OF GOVERNMENT.

By Peabl Pen. Wellington, August 10. That Hansard, and other reporters, get heartily tired before the close of a long session, goes without saying, for even a moderate amount, of such work becomes monotonous and trying to a degree as the months go^by, and the end is not yet. " Pooh ! they are just for the maist part but a ne'er-do-weel set nf scoffers!" exclaimed an old Scotch acquaintance of mine the other evening, when speaking about reporters and press writers generally; a slander which I, oE course, hastened to refute with scornful indignation. Happily there is hope now that they will be reclaimed, as the Salvationists are showing a special interest in their spiritual welfare. There is a story of a certain newspaper reporter who was sitting among the audience at a revival meeting, and was accosted by a well-meaning, but over-zealous gentleman, who put to him the question, " Are you a Christian ?" "No, lam a reporter," was the reply. The gentleman was taken aback, and probably shocked by this curious answer. I fancy he would not have put the - question if he had known the young man to be a reporter, for it is well known that at temperance and revival meetings which reporters have to attend professionally, they are as a rule let severely alone, and doubtless appreciate the non-interference. However, it appears that General Booth and the Salvation Army are very much concerned about their wellbeing, and occasionally of late the reporters are specially prayed for at their meetings. But whether they really think that pressmen are an altogether ungodly set, or whether they mean their intercessions to be a sort of " return for services rendered" by the reporters of their meetings, deponent knoweth not. At one of their Exeter Hall meetings lately General Booth referred with special pleasure to the fact that the Army had "even saved an American reporter and a Swedish editor." Clearly the General considers the condition of pressmen to be all but hopeless, else he would not have used that very suggestive little word " even." But one should be jealous for the reputation of the craft ; and of one thing I am certain— namely., that though pressmen have faults like other folks, yet they are not one-half so black as they are painted. Here is one of the funniest speeches anent the

"woman suffrage" question that I have ever listened to. The debater suffers from a slight impediment in his speech, and this peculiarity and the curiously original series of arguments he. used on the occasion combined to produce one of the drollest and most unanswerable speeches possible. It ran somewhat after the following style : — " The first thing to find out is w-w-what man was m-made for, and what w-w-woman was made for. God created Adam first, and put him in the garden of Eden. T-then He made Eve, and p-pub her there too. If He hadn't c-c-created Eve there never would have been all the s-s-sin there is liow in this w-world. If He hadn't made Eve she never would have p-p-picked the apple and eaten it. N-n-no; she never would have picked it and given it to Adam to eat. Paul and his Epistles says w-w-woman should keep still. And, besides, gentlemen, women couldn't fill the offices. I d-d-defy anyone to point out a woman in this city or in the c-c-country that could be a constable. Would a woman turn out at dead of night to track and arrest a murderer ? I say n-no. Ten to one she would elope with him." At the end of his oration this gallant defender of man's rights took his seat amid thunders of applause and laughter. The speech was delivered at a debating club. I have been troubled of late with grave doubts as to whether Mr Ruskin is after all a teacher of sound morality. For instance, he advocates stealing a pair of "Socks if needful, but on no account must you buy them on credit. The following is an amusing letter sent in reply to a request that Mr Ruskin should contribute towards a fund for paying off a church debt. He says, " Sir, I am scornfully amused at your appeal to me, of all people in the world, the precisely least likely to give you a farthing ! My first word to all men and boys who care to hear me is, " Don't get into debt. Starve and go to heaven, but don't borrow. Try first begging — I don't mind— if its really needful — stealing. But don't buy things you can't pay for !" And of all manner of debtors pious people building churches they can't pay for are the most detestable nonsense to me. Can't you preach and pray behind the hedges, or in a sandpit, or a coalhole, first ? And of all manner of churches thus idiotically built, iron churches are the damnablest to me. And of all the sects ot believers in any ruling spirit, Hindoos, Turks, Feather Idolators, and Mumbo Jumbo, log and fire worshippers — who want churches, your modern English evangelical sect is the most absurd', and entirely objectionable and unendurable to me ! All of which they might very easily have found out from my books — any other sort of sect would, before | bothering one to write it to them." Mr Ruskin is evidently becoming as sour and crusty as Carlyle. No doubt Dunediuwill be exceptionally gay during the coming summer, as the vice-regal residence is to be in the Southern capital during | that season. Of course Wellington people will be very sorry to lose Sir William and Lady Jervois, for they are extremely popular here, but at the sam<? time it is only fair that Dunedin should enjoy a like favour with the other chief cities of the colony. Lady Jervois is. I know, immensely pleased with the prospect of a season in Otago, and certainly if her ladyship derives as much benefit from the invigorating climate as I did myself last summer — which I spent for the sake of health and recreation in the "Sunny South " — then, indeed, there will be no valid reason for regretting the change. And let me add, that as far as my experience goes, there are no more hospitable peopleto be found in the colony than are those of Otago, tbe stranger guest being entertained with a generous courtesy not to be excelled, or easily forgotten. The members of the Wellington Garrison Amateur Dramatic Club have gained for themselves a very unenviable notoriety lately by giving a performance — doubtless with the best possible intentions — for the benefit of the Hospitals and Charitable Aid Fund, which' it appears the public did not care to support, the result being that the unfortunate Hospital Committee, instead of finding themselves the recipients of a substantial sum for the good of the institution, have actually been obliged to pay about £10 to make up the loss on the performance. One would have thought that rather than have allowed themselves to be so disparagingly " talked about " these " gallant soldiers " would have paid the price twice told out of their own pockets. The weather was cold, the Premier cross, Sir Julius sulky, and the talk stupid; why then should not a few grave and serious legislators lighten the strain of their arduous duties by the trifling indulgence of a regular good game of leap-frog in the lobbies of the House, if they liked it ? A,t any rate, ifc is said that this lively — if not legislative game — was entered into with zest by several members of the House of Representatives the other morning, . and of course there has been a lot of talk about it, and heaps of " chaff " flying in all directions. But, after all, where was the harm in it ? Wasn't it far better than quarrelling and roundly abusing each other, as they would in all probability have been doing if they had not taken to acting like a lot of college lads just freed from severe academical restraints ? In truth 'twas nothing more than a " college joke to cure the dumps."

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