Transferring the " Deyil."

Otago Witness, Issue 1764, 12 September 1885, Page 27

Transferring the " Deyil."

Mr and Mrs Fubbs are as well-known and respectable a couple as ever lived in the Hutt Valley. About six months ago old Fubbs caught a bad cold, which ended in a cough which, as is generally the case, was much worse at night than during the daytime, to the great annoyance of Mrs Fubbs. As soon as Fubbs would retire for the might a fit of coughing would come on, and all thought of sleep would be quickly banished from the mind of the indignant Mrs F. This went on for some days, notwithstanding the horehouud tea and different stuff the troubled Mr Fubbs was continually taking at the instigation of his better half. One night Mrs Fubbs said —

"Look here, Jem, it's my opinion you've got asthma, and that your lungs* are going." " Bosh," said Fubbs, irritably, and at the same time half suffocated with coughing. " Well, then, my dear, it's my solemn opinion you are possessed with a devil."

For it must be borne in mind that Mrs Fubbs is a religious woman, and is rather given to looking at all troubles from a biblical point of view.

" One thing is very certain," returned her spouse, " I've got a devil of a cough." " Well," continued his wife, calmly ignoring the vile attempt at wit, " I don't mean to stand it any longer ; I shall be off to Wellington for a trip, for you're breaking my rest night after night, and if I stay here much longer I shall be laid up." And off to town she went, and stayed away nearly three weeks, during which time old Fubbs looked after himself, the house, and the cat. Now it so happened that this cat was a bit of a favourite, and used to come to the bedside of a morning and wake Fubbs up. About a week before the partner of his joys, but in this case not his sorrows, came back, Fubbs observed ,the cat coughing and gasping in a curious way, and, strange to relate, as the cat got worse old Fubbs got better, and by the time that his renegade spouse returned his cough had entirely left him. This Mrs F. did not observe until Fubbs came to bed, when, to her astonishment, he lay quite still and went to sleep without a single cough. Next morning Mrs F. observed — " Why, my dear, your asthma is better." " I don't know about asthma," returned Fubbs, " but I believe it was gospel truth what you said." "What?" " Why, you said you believed I was possessed of a devil, and I have come to the same conclusion during your absence, and for this reason : You know the Bible says the devil left the man and went into the pigs, and they all ran mad and drowned themselves. Well, now for the illustration : While you were away the devil went out of me and into our old cat. Just go and see for yourself." Day after day the cat's cough got worse and worse, and the animal grew thinner and thinner, and it ultimately became a shadow of its former self. At last it made a sort of rush out into the back yard, rolled over, gave a few spasmodic kicks and coughs, and then expired peacefully. " There," said old Fubbs, " ain't it just as I told you?" "What?" " Why, the devil went out of me and went into the cat, and it's gone mad and rushed out, and turned over and over, until it has coughed itself to death. That is not asthma, but the devil's own work, in accordance with what you were telling me before you went to town." And the worthy couple firmly believe in this thebry to this day.— C. W. H.