The "Mum" Sociable.

Otago Witness, Issue 1652, 21 July 1883, Page 28

The "Mum" Sociable.

"Lend me your revolver," said a young man, with hiß nose skinned, his eyes blackened, and bis white necktie around under his ear, and one tail of his dress-coat torn off, as he came into a West Side saloon.

" What's the matter with you t' said the bartender, looking ugly at him. "Do you Buppose I am going to lend you a revolver to kill somebody, and then be arrested for being an accessory ? Not much ! But what's the matter ? You look as though you came out of a window. Was anything the matter with the door V

The young man took a wet towel and sopped the blood off his nose, and then said : " You look like a man that can be trusted, and whose advice would be safe to follow in an emergency, and I will tell you about this murder that I contemplate, and maybe you may give me some points, as you have no doubt murdered many people. The trouble is right here. Our lodge is to give a ' mum social ' this evening. You know what a mum social is. Young people go to a house and sit around all the evening and keep their mouths shut, and never say a word till a signal is given ; then they all make up for lost time and talk for all that is out. (Is my nose bleeding yet ? Thanks.) They wanted me to go, and I just came from there. That is I came from the house next door. You see, I went to the wrong house and rang the bell. A man in his shirt-sleeves came to the door and said, ' Good evening;' but I wasn't going to be caught speaking, because you have to pay a forfeit if you speak. So I just walked right in and pulled off my overcoat and hung it up, and hung my hat on the hat-rack. The man looked a little bit annoyed, but he asked me if the weather was not softening up a little. I smiled but didn't say anything, and I walked into the sitting-room. I thought I was the first one there, and I felt very awkward. The man watched me pretty closely, and finally he said I had the advantage of him ; and I smiled again, but didn't say anything. Now that I think of it, I noticed that he unbuttoned his shirt-sleeves and began to roll them up. He asked me to what circumstance he was indebted for the honour of this visit, and I thought he was trying to get me off my guard, so I smiled one of my best smiles, and looked at him as much as to say, ' You can't play any of your games on the undersigned.' The man came up behind me and hissed in my ear, ' What is your little game, any way ?' Well, I wasn't going to speak and give myself away, so I looked at him sort of impudent, as much as to say, ' Oh, go and chase yourself around your feet,' and then I thought lightning had struck me. He took me by the throat with one hand, and by the vicinity of the coat-tail with the other hand, and he choked me so my tongU9 ran out ; and bis wife screamed and said, 'Don't kill him,' and the man hustled me out into the hall and opened the front door, and he picked me up bodily and threw me out into a snowbank five feet deep. I struggled a little going out of the door, and ran my nose against the door casing, and I guess he forgot to let go of my coat-tail when I went out. I struck head first in the snow, and before I could dig my head out the door closed, and 1 could not explain my conduct to the man. I was so mad I could not have explained anyway. Just as I got out of the snowbank and shook myself the door opened, and the man threw out my overcoat and hat and overshoes, and he told his wife to hurry up with the shotgun, and he would take me on the fly as I went over the fence. Well, I didn't wait for no shotgun, but grabbed my coat and things, and came down the street on a gallop. I met a lot of the young people going up, and as I turned the corner I Baw them going into the next house to the one that I visited, and that was the first I knew of my mistake. Now, what T want is for you to tell me whether I had better shoot that man or kill him with a club. I was raised in the South, and my warm Southern blood will not stand any such treatment." — American Paper.