Umbrella Flirtation

Otago Witness, Issue 1555, 27 August 1881, Page 26

Umbrella Flirtation

To shut it means that a hat or two is to be knocked off. . To lend an umbrella Indicates, ' I »m a fool.' . ,• . " To carry It in your lap means, ' Oh, that it were you 1' To oarry it from home in the morning means, 'It will clear off.' To turn an umbrella, in a gnat of windpresagea profanity. To select the worat indicates, 'That it is the, only one left.' . ,< .' To purchase an umbrella means, 'I am not smart, but honest.' To let It. fall on the ground indicates that it will become muddy. To' suck the handle of your umbrella meanß, • I am not weaned.' To carry your umbrella in a case signifies • That it is a shabby one.'

To select the best umbrella from the raok means, 'I am the pick, of the lot.' To place your umbrella In a raok indicates that it ia about to change owners. To scratch your head with your umbrella means, ' I itch to get a, better one.' To punch your umbrella into a person and then open it means, ' I dislike you.', To open it quickly in the street means that somebody's eye is going to be put out. To carry' your umbrella on your shoulder indioates, , ' My life ia insured. ' To return an umbrella means— never mind what it means ; nobody ever doeß that. To wipe your face with It means, ' I have no handkerchief. This is a severe wpie.' To give a friend half of your umbrella means, ' That both of you will get wet.' When the man has the umbrella, and the woman the drippings, it indicates marriage. To' swing your umbrella over your head signifies, ' I am making a nuisance of my self.' , , r , To let your umbrella drip down a neighbour's neck signifies, • I hope you are quite com "or table.'

To put a cotton umbrella by the aide of a nice Bilk one Bignifies, 'Exchange is no robbery.' To trail your umbrella along the sidewalk means that the man behind you is thirsting for your blood. To "carry it at rlgh.t angles under your arm signifies that an eye ia to be lost by the man who follows you. To place a wet umbrella where it will drain on your friend's carpet signifies, ' Pray, don't mention it.' ' An umbrella carried over the woman, the. man getting nothing but the drlpplngß of the rain, signifies courtship. To press an umbrella on a' friend, Baying, * Oh, do take it. I much rather you would than not,' signifies, 'That you are l>ing.'