Flotsam and Jetsam.

Otago Witness, Issue 1342, 18 August 1877, Page 14

Flotsam and Jetsam.

Si qttid novisti reetius itiit CandtiLu* imperti; ti non, hit utere mecum.

"If yon know anjfchiag better than the*x> *emarksof mine, kiudly tell mej if not, use these with me."

I am completely fixed up about this Turko-Russian war. With the aid of a first rate atlas, and a fair memory for places, I managed for some weeks to keep up with the armies so to speak ; the telegrams have altogether floored me now. A wave of scepticism has swept over my eoul, and I am now almost inclined to suppose that there is no war going on at all. What between the jawbreaking names and their equally impossible conjuncture, I don't believe that anyone who attentively studies the daily telegrams, as they appear, can possibly understand the war. Jn sheer despair at the difficulty, I repose my soul after much wavering on a perusal of the home news. The compiler of that excellent budget of war intelligence that appears therein monthly will have to answer for a great deal. For the future I may be some weeks behind my friends in what I know about events, but then I expect that what I do know i shall know well. I shall have no further trouble in unlearning anything. I shall not be under the impression 'fhat Batoum and Kustchuk are equally parts of the quadrilateral, nor ohail I be under the impression that the Danube flows past Krzeroum. I shall know nothing for three weeks, but then on the fourth I shall know a lot more than everyone who has read the daily telegrams. Someone is sure to find out for me if England is really going to strike in. I am amused just now to find in Charles Kingley's life a letter, in which he says " I feel with you that the only ground on which Sabbath amusements can be really defended is as a carrying out of the divineness of the Sabbath. I have often fancied I should like to Bee the great useless naves and aisles of our cathedrals turned into Museums and winter gardens, where -people might take their Sunday walks, and yet attend service." This is certainly a bold doctrine. Had he taught it in Ocago in 1877 he would have been immolated on the fierce fires of Otagan superstition.

What's in a name? I see that the promoters of a Church of England Young Men's Association were unable to do anything the other day, because they could not agree as to the name to be given to the thing. While Nero was fiddling, Rome was burning. The Dunedin Young Men's Association, on the other hand, Beem to be thriving, a? they deserve to do, from their indomitable pluck and hard work. Their have shown, by sticking to their business, that all things are possible to the brave. Wasn't ifc rather a strong proposal though, when thfl Ri&ht Bey. Chairman refused to put a motion from the chair, to put this other that he now do leave the chair ] I hope that as many Young Men's Associations will be formed as possible ; they want ie all.

Tie Harbour Board has come to the end of its wits, and doesn't know which way to turn next. If Mr Proudfoot won't meet them, tho poor men must be miserable indeed. I consider Mr Proudfoot's last despatch rather a model of good incisive English. Someone said that the members of the Board turned and twisted as they heard it, and looked as uncomfortable as the writer could wish. The best thing that the Board could do now in my opinion is to make a clean sweep and begin again. Let them pay the contractor a fair sum for compensation and break off the contract. At present I see a law snit impending, and if that is sure to come then it had better come at once.

I admire the pluck of the Professor of Natural Science in taking the V ice-Chan-cellor by the throat and Bhaking him. The defence was an alibi, which, as we all know, is not considered satisfactory save and except by the parent " Weller." Dr Stuart has laid that aged man's advice to hia soul, and pleaded first that the "ViceChancellor doesn't fill the pulpit at Knox Church, but only Dr Stuart, and then that it was a piece of cheek on the part of a professor to beard his official superior.

Why do the Ministry cling so pertinaciously to their seat 3 ? The true way to remain permanently in office would be to let Sir George Grey take the reins for one short month. He would never have them again, and the present Ministry would have an almost life tenure. Old stagers in political warfare assure rue,

however, that this sort of thing often breaks down — that when anyone, however objectionable, has once got on the benches of power, it is next to impossible to get them out. Possession is nine points of the law.

The Clutha County Council having awoke from their long lethargy, are desirous of not giving that which coats nothing to their ungrateful country. Therefore they want railway passes to Dunedin. In the interests of their wives I should object.

Crustacean.