PASSING NOTES.

Otago Daily Times, Issue 18074, 23 October 1920, Page 4

PASSING NOTES.

Tho holding of two mass meetings on the same afternoon at places so wide apart is Wingatui and the Queen's Gardens should ho forbidden by legislative* enactment. It places the citizen who desires entertainment in ail embarrassment of choice, which docs not predispose him to the full enjoyment of either show. The thousands who selected the excitement of VVingatui on Saturday afternoon last missed Llio quieter but not less enjoyable frivolity | nf tho mass meeting at tho Queen's Gar- I dens. This was held under the auspices nf tho Dukes of Plaza Bore Oh to discuss , tho High Cost of Living. Tho attendance ' was surprisingly large—as many as 150 j men, women, and children being present. His Worship the Mayor took the chair, which meant on this occasion that he walked about tho platform. But iri tho orgie of metaphor over which he presided words lost their meaning. The most i trenchant speakers of the afternoon were | two irrepressible inebriates, one loudvoiced and combative, the other talkative but inarticulate: First,. Irrepressible Inebriate:—Bill Massey's just lookin' on, that's wot 'o I is. 'E's jnst lookin' on. Second I. I.: —(truculently but incomprehensibly) : . First I. I.: —Bill. Massey's laugh in' at ye. that's wot 'e is. Second I. I.: (cogently): Givo mo Labour* every time. First I. I.: —Yv ot's wrorMj with you Mlows is that ver can't Yer jealous of each other. That's wot it is. Second I. I.:—Yah! I'm for Labour, every t : me. As is usual in such gatherings, the platform speakers found their chief embarrassment in the inconsequential interruptions of their own supporters. They strove to svork up their audience to enthusiasm with in oration on the iniquities of the butter producers, only to be flattened out by " Give us more sugar," or " What about the coal miners?" The speaker who said that " if the watersiders declared butter ' black' they would have machine guns trained on them, and would have to pay the price of their iecision in blood," was speaking with his tongue in his cheek. Or else he has the power of talking himself into any opinion under the sun—or moon. When was a strike in New Zealand ever suppressed in this way? When was a strike Lu New Zealand ever suppressed^at all? The right to strike is universally recognised. What is not recognised is the strikers' right to interfere with men who prefer to work. And strikers do not confine their interference to moral suasion. The speaker on Saturday afternoon knew that as well as I do. What then was his object? The fault lies in the habit of blood-red metaphor which such speakers have contracted. They know their audience. Thov cry with waving arms that " the lash of the employers' whip swirls and hisses over the bare backs of their industrial slaves," till their auditors becrin to feel a shooting pain between the shoulder blades, which the doctor had ascribed to lumbago. " The employers' heel is on your, faces, grinding to the very bone." And the audience puts its hand to its face and feels for the mark. No part of the body is exempt from this diabolical torture > inflicted by the employer. He seizes upon the heart of his victim and squeezes out his very life blood. He grinds him to powder, and makes him' bow to the dust. If, as one speaker is reported as having said on Saturday, ohe only real sc»ntion of the difficulty was for the people to become owners of all products," the poor old English language aMiav once again come under control. Nowadavs it is beinc ruined by unscrupulous exploiters. The genesis of after-dinner stories is a matter of mystery. Are they honestly original, or innocently, plagiarised, or un-' scrupulously stolen ? A story told in a 1 Northern paper throws indirectly some light on the subject. It is a hackneyed one, and has already appeared in this column in a form slightly different: The wit of a ccrtain_ Maori convert, whose fame is raising "(sic) high as a ' preacher of Christian doctrine, was one day faced with a rather embarrassing position. He was talking to a congregation of prospective active converts upon the old story of Daniel in tho lions' den. With the full power of \liis impassioned oratory he described tho lions. . . . But Henaro at the back did not move. " Py korry," he said, I tink you wrong. Me I see the lion come round in the circus. He not a fierce fellow at all. He tame, ho quiet, he not big and strong at all." , The preacher gasped, and the audience looked with approval upon the interrupter, for who had not seen the spiritless boasts of the travelling circus? "Where you see these tamo lions?" asked tho preacher. " In the circus." " You all wrong, tho lions I talk about was B.C.—Before Circuses " -Many years ago? on the deck of an intercolonial boat, I heard an American A. tell this story to an American 8., but the scene was laid in a Methodist preaching house in Louisiana. 'A few months later, I heard the same American B. tell the story to a Dunedin audience, stating that he had actually been present at the negro preaching house in Virginia when the scene took place, and had seen the circus. No doubt the same story has travelled round the world, changing its scene, its character, its colour with the teller, and retaining only one permanent feature—the interpretation of B.C. as meaning "before circuses." Probably in every version the real point- will have been missed, and the missing of this point turns the laugh against American A, American B, and the Northern New Zealand plagiarised paper. The lions with which Daniel passed tbo night were King Darius's circus lions. Why should so many good things come from Southland? The following two. inches of sheer delight has just appeared' in an Invercargill paper : ; — Borough of Rivebton. Applications, accompanied by testimonials, are invited for the combined positions of Surfaceman, Gas Manager, Corporation Carter, Nightsoil Removal Service Contractor, Sexton, Poundkeeper, Inspector of Nuisances, and Dog Tax Collector. Applicant to state remuneration required. 'We have all seen or heard of the Central Otago township where the hairdresser is also tho bicycle repairer, also the fruiterer, also the dispenser of cakes and sweets. But the brilliancy of "this picture pales beside the combination in one person of the whole municipal activities of Riverton with the exception of tho fire-brigade and the librarian of the public library. Such things are frequently met with, as wo all know, in primitive communities. One may readily admit that the sexton may easily add to his duties those of poundkeeper—the offices have a certain similarity. But it is not so easy to imagine why a man skilled in dog tax collecting should necessarily bo able to act as gas engineer. If closely examined, the two positions are quite incompatible. A man should not be allowed to run about the town collecting dog taxes and stray horses when he ought to be staying at home making gas. Wo are left to assume that the responsibilities of the position advertised are not sufficiently arduous—in Riverton—to occunv the waking hours of more than one man. Besides tho lumping together of the seven positions has the merit of cheapness. Dear " Civis,"—Can you answer the following? Is it' true that the train from Oamaru to Kurow on Friday evening carried 6 sacks of sugar, equal to 12 bags of 701bs, consigned to a farmer up the line, while grocers and others cannot get a scrap? If you can answer that, with reasons, please do so. Mother. Does " Mother " think I had had a banc: in it? If I had I should not draw it ou( empty. But let us state tho problem. " One sack of sugar is equal to two bag: of sugar. One bag of sugar is equal tc 701b of sugar. If a farmer up the line gets 6 sacks of sugar, how many lbs of sugai does the grocer down the line get? Giv< the answor to four places of decimals Also tell approximately the number of sh sugar sellers Jiving in Oamaru." 1 fee loth to admit that tho problem beats me Probably, as with sly grog so with sh sugar. You can get any amount o£ th< ml stuff if jon know where to go for it

A correspondent, writes to -complain of tho low standard of education revealed by, speeches in Parliament. The complaint inav appeal' to somo readers quite unnecessary. Ho writes: One University (Ofcago) graduate talks about "creating a Frankenstein." Another quotes " Pnrturiurit montes l'idikulus mus." Apart from l 0 i' ' le urbanely- translates it for trie benefit of the less erudite: " I'lie mountains wore in la.bour and there canio forth a little mouse." If theso tilings are done in tlie green tree . Ana members correct their own proofs. 1 ho dopersonification of Frankenstein is a common error. As everybody knows—or should know—Frankenstein was a young student who constructed a monster out of the fragments of bodies gathered from dissecting rooms and graveyards—a living human form without a soul. The story was written by Mrs Shelley as the result °/ a compact with Byron when Byron and the Shelleys were spending a summer on the banks of Lake Geneva. As far as we know, poor young Frankenstein was no more a monster than students generally are. As regards the knowledge of Latin showed by the classical member, a man who quotes Latin in Parliament or elsewhere is as safe as if he quoted Choctaw. Dear " Civis,"—As your Passing JNotes declare you to bo of a more or less critical turn of mind, may I venture to odor critic.sm of them in my ■ r ,,/ 11 t' lo issue of Saturday, you fay ' Tins class of persons use . . ." i! ff.'i "''' ik, should have been couohed ■tins class of persons use? . . .1" or better still "Persons of this class i" SO ., - because persons govrned t .> ot ~c ali n . o t P oss ibly be nom.native to use. Why then the plural verb unless you trvat "class" as (incorrurtly in my opinion) a noun of multitude? Again, is there any justification for class of persons," as most grammarians prefer "class of person"? 0.8.H.5. The pseudonym adopted "by this correspondent fills me with kihclly feelings, and encourages me to a patient disquisition. In the lirst place, lam misquoted. What I wrote was " VVith that class of persons who use. . The verb "use" is 111 the plural its subject "who" is in the plural;/And, "who" is plural because its antecedent " persons" is plural. Does correspondent make class" the antecedent of "who"? In that case I shou.lt! have said " that class of persons which- \uses," for a collective noun denoting a group of individuals regarded as forming one complete whole, and followed by a singular verb, must be neuter. But why snould " class" not , e J? plnraj verb if the sense demanded ' « ai ? * - not ' or ratller should I not say ' the sixth form were banking the desks"? I should advise " 0.8.H.5." to look up his grammar, or, better stiil, to look up several grammars, and compare them. His conception of grammar is too formal, and he is in danger of being.left behind. His final statement that "most grammarians prefer ' class of person ' " is not true to fact. I wonder where he cot such an idea from. Civis.