A SCOTCHMAN'S PRONUNCIATION.

Otago Daily Times, Issue 4267, 21 October 1875, Page 3

A SCOTCHMAN'S PRONUNCIATION.

TO THE EDITOR. In the columns of one of your weekly contemporaries there has lately appeared a rather amusing letter from a well-known clergyman in this city, on the subject of a Scotchman's pronunciation of English, apropos of a skit on the late "Spelling Bee " for the benefit of the Cricket Club. The following original piece of poetry takes the other side of the question, and gives a Scotchman's idea of the Englishman's pronunciation of the "mother tongue;" and, in case any Tokomairiro gentleman should feel that the writer has him in his eye, and wo consult some legal firm in town with a view to damages, I would refer him to the "Weekly Scotsman of the 14fch August. Should you be an Englishman yourself, Mr Editor—or, it may be, an Irishman —your wellknown liberality in such vexed matters may be relied upon to give the poor Scotchman fair play, exile as he is from his native shores, with hut small probability of ever returning.— Yours, &c, A Scotchman. A LITTLE HINGLISH. Siuth of Hie Tweed you have such strange expressions, !Vat from \\\" swcii jou ought to take some lessons Iv orthography and pronounciatiou, For which they arc distinguished as a nation. Your ears are yah*, menwtli you s&v for ru<-uth, j Such is the language of yo'ir favourite s-outh ; Your hair 's ji.ur air—.ir, hair ; your hat's your 'at, \ our arm 's your ham. the kit you call the cat ; Your hand 's your 'end, a park you call a pawk; A horse, an 'oss; and fork you call a fa<vk j A brute 's n bruoot, an a3-< you evil a ha<s ; Your heiirt 's your 'art, and gid you call a lass ; We hear you call the word propose, propows ; And worse lh-.n that, you cill your nose your nows. A hen 'san " n ;" your head you call your 'cad ; A nun 's a win : an e;.'g wiili y v 's a he<rsr; In place of " v's," you put in double " v's ;" Tv sday 's tnosd.iy : the new< with you 's the noose ; The harbor 's abba ; while the cove 's the coivie ; The army 's hanny, and a stone 's a st >\vnc; liiea *s hidea ; my dear, my diah : Whisky 's wisk.y, ar.d your beer 's beah ; We've been nt < 'xford, that most learned part, Where quairt is use 1 to Mgnify a quart. A pipe's a poipe ; a pistie, standing post I Look to it Oxford, lest your fame be lost. A c indie's kendlc ; Rut's the word for soot . Handle's endle ; for sip 'tis always soop ; For come, 'tis coom : for stuff, 'Us always stooff; And drum is drooin, and puff is always poof. Through Yo-Vshire, Lancashire, and Durham too, ''Pis thou and fiee wiih them, instead of you. In Lancashire they say they'll poouch the 'ed, Will poise thoe back for thee. o>- kick thee leg ; Their what is wurr, a leet they call a light. And in the streets some even kick and bice; They cull a nut a noot, a stump a stoomp, And pump, of cou fie, they always call a poomp; In Vi rkshire I'gg*s to lie, and laik to play, Hugg's to crry, and fawk out's to pay ; A fhht's a f -u'tit. a mile th".y eill a moil, The house's te 'ou-e, ad sometimes 'tis te oil; If he gets done he says he has been dnon, His coat's his qucpit, his gun he calls his goon ; About, a fool, he sa3'S lie is a fooill, And tool, of course, with him is always tcoil; Where cist the gaum. says the Durham man ; Table's Uab'e, and one is alAa.ys yan ; His own dear city Durham i1? Dawum, And Norliam.of course, with him is JTawautn; The truest thin;r, perhn}>s, that le:ivcs his jaws, He kivw-e, you I;naw, but tlien he Kays thou gnaws ; Abie's yable, hutter he calls booler; NakcdV nyakt, and cutter he ca'ls c 'Oter ; Ttacon's bvakn, and ale he says is yeli; Sucli WelKhii!c« words arc dcvellivh hard to spell. Ha awaya, forcmtie away: jiray's pray" ; And when he gets his yell asks what to paya. They say Kolliumhelund ; Harkworth's Hnkwoth; There's no burr here, the thing is perfect buff. Here is the " r " omitted altogether, And handed over to your Scottish brother, The Scottish snob, the maid, and bourding miss. Their own line Doric leave for stuff like this. Before we v»art, we wish to ask of you, ' Which, is the greatest murd'rer of the two? July, 1875. Joseph .Tebkan.